Tokal and baybisha: one husband for two?the Well-known phrase “If I am a sultan, I would have three wives“ for some inhabitants of east region and one of the most picturesque countries of the broken-up USSR - Kazakhstan, turned not into a song line for a long time, and into norm of life at which the man has though not three wives, but whole two - perhaps.
The adult wife and the young mistress who under certain circumstances can quite pass into the status of the second wife official - it quite suits the head of family. Why?
In society where it is possible to receive a good position often thanks to money or communications where the young girl cherishing plans for beautiful life does not wish to marry let and darling, but poor guy - artful and cunning plans for a gain of a place in the sun and opportunities to buy this innocent and desired beauty status men exactly there are born young seductresses.
Well, with them - that everything is clear: one wife - it is good, two - it is even better and that women? How they can accept to themselves to the house and life young the second even if continue to remain at the same time senior and main - a baybisha? And how to reconcile to the fact that you will always be in the status beautiful, young, but... deprived of civil rights, being called at the same time only “tokat“, the mistress in fact?
Is expensive, but it is prestigious
If you think that history about tokat - it is the fairy tale about the millionaire and the former prostitute, it is incorrect: to tokalka not girls “from the street“ come. Singers and dancers in the past, housemaids or nurses, the mercenary girlfriends of young daughters who got to disgrace business - vumen - it is not as important as you will enter beautiful life, it is more important that you could be late there and then there will be to you and a champagne for breakfast, and the abroad on every weekend.
In Kazakhstan to have two wives at once in general it is considered prestige top. Senior to you it is put for confidence in the future, for a cosiness and tasty beshbarmak on a table for dinner, for a support in business and a practical advice, and younger - for pleasures in beds and raisings of own status.
To indulge “ego“, having tried it with competitors and colleagues - that is why men bring the second wives; to avoid poverty and to ride as cheese in oil, without working at the same time - that is why enter sinful communication with married and others tokat young.
Meanwhile without polygamy
In Kazakhstan, we will not wriggle now, polygamy successfully practices throughout centuries. Only that official law about it it is not adopted yet, however to bring the mistress in the status tokat, one blessing of the mullah sometimes suffices.
For this purpose it is necessary all “nothing“: to marry a molodukha by rules of Sharia with obligatory presence in the mosque to a baybisha. The ceremony “íčę˙ő“ is called - it means that the senior wife does not oppose double marriage. In this place all to a baybisha exhale and cunning rub palms: “Aha, in any way without nikyakh. There is, so a lazeechka!“
I though parliamentarians in Kazakhstan already twice for the last 15 years tried to remove polygamy in legal “business“, their colleagues - women of the nasty offer did not accept - only if in exchange for permission about “multicourage“. Here parliamentarians are silent as fishes about ice, and eyes on the parties drive.
Minuses or pluses?the way of life is not tumbled down by
“Tokalny“, but is very widespread and if with stay pluses in the status of the second wife everything is clear at once, then here it is necessary to deal with minuses in more detail.
Relatives against What
of mother it will want span that her krovinushka became only the second in the man`s life? Even if also rich? And how to look in the face to the relatives who got used to “simpler“, but an honest way of life? On a question how to answer: “Why you are not married in whole 25?“
of the Colleague too
People from outside will begin to despise you, and someone will be able even to begin to hate: “She does not respect herself!“ Well and anywhere not to get to from the fact that you “fought“ the husband off some good woman: colleagues - ladies for holidays will not call you any more, and on an office party otsyanut far away together with blessed.
LEXUSa is not more expensive than
They say that is higher than a gift, than Lexus, tokat does not receive. Like, is some informal spisochek at these rich dads in which it is accurately registered: by what car tokat rides where lives that receives also other.
Loneliness - the swine
By and large, being even “married“ and in cash, you will alone feel. To you nobody will allow to bring the lover for the company, and for New year, The Eighth of March and during week-end you will spend evenings of the house together with a cat.
the room of breakages Is full of
to Beat a nail, to go to shop, to run away and be protected from hooligans - you with success have to master all this because the “lawful“ husband will do all this for a baybisha, and at you to gostevat arrivals.
Beyond the law
If when (and it is a matter of time) the husband wants to leave you, he surely will make it. At the same time any guarantees for what on clemency of soul will decide to leave you a half excessively acquired: neither itself in charity will not hit, nor the senior wife of it will resolve.
And it is the most honest and bitter truth of “tokalny“ life.