Fighters in kindergarten ofto my
to a synula 2 years and 2 months. The group mixed - and children to 4 - x years. Yesterday the boy, to him 3 and a half runs out to us towards. This boy never goes just like that, and imitates aggressive any gestures - like karate - tycht with a hekanye a fist and heels in a nose to other children. Not strongly - but it is unpleasant. As the day before I already admired it when it at me took away our machine from mine and did not want to give - just told me - “will manage!“ And this time he runs up and speaks - “Mother will buy me a knife and I will kill your Senka in a stomach“ - and sticks to mine with a fist in puziko.
Ya without thinking to it I answer - “well and the fool - go from here“ - reaction at me as at the kindergarten girl.
A what to do? What should be done at that moment and whether it is necessary to do something farther?
18. 1. 2001 13:57:21, the Small piece of ice
- to Talk to tutors and parents that in case they CAN not influence the child (and they are obliged to do it), you will raise a question for the manager of transfer of this boy to special establishment.
19. 1. 2001 3:4:24, Nyusha
- In group is the boy who beats all. Spoke both with it, and with his mother. The behavior of the son of fears does not inspire in it. Well and that, children will understand. So to that mother on problems of your child can deeply spit, and at the she does not see problems.
21. 1. 2001 12:34:50, Breke Ke
- Should protect the child. You arrived perfectly. And I in such cases say that my child cannot be offended, and a point. And the child so answers. Of course, it is necessary that children for themselves could stand, but it should be learned. What words to say what to do at the same time when to ask about the help when most to understand. And here it is necessary to monitor the text: the fool - it is somehow not convincing and offensive, And here Senka CAN not be cut! In my opinion, better it will be apprehended. Though, it is a shame to admit I somehow such situation sent the child in z... at. It was a shame terribly, still I do not know mother learned about it him or not... (Well very much to me it was bad).
18. 1. 2001 14:53:12, Friday
- the Similar story was in our kindergarten. The boy, we will call him Dima, constantly snatched on all children (bit, pulled for hair, fought). My child began to complain and cry that is afraid to go to a garden. Teachers did not know how to cope with it: and in an amicable way tried, and tied to a chair (!) . However “draconian“ methods of tutors frightened also other children: the son came home and with eyes, big from the endured impression, told how Dima was tied to a chair, Dima was struck a bottom etc. Parents tried to talk to the boy`s mother, but she was very aggressive woman, and - it is natural - very much protected the child. Parents complained the manager, wrote the application. Dima`s mother was invited to sit in group, to observe the son. At mother the boy behaved well. Houses as mother claimed, he behaved well too... However, as mother left, history repeated. As a result just all parents and tutors created intolerable conditions for Dima`s mother, and she took away the child.
But it is not a method of a solution too. It would be much better if more professional teachers or psychologists worked with children.
19. 1. 2001 14:11:20, Nata Gorsky
- Ya “on the place of such mother“. Yes - complaints to my kid were... You judge. Which of complaining tried to understand a situation? How there is a fight at 3 - x the summer kid? It is clear, that the child and only he is important. And only it we protect it, without reflecting why with it acted this way. I do not want to consider cases where as it was spoken children below “only aggressive animated cartoons at home look“, or other basis to such behavior now is (alcoholism of parents e.g.) . In general the word “aggression“ I would not use
concerning children even if they told “I will kill a knife“. Many children, and similar without telling anything, secretly mucks do to others and keep in themselves this quality then in adulthood. These “knives“ in application to children are often exaggerated by adults who do not see in children of CHILDREN, and all try to estimate on - to the adult. What it is abnormal to hear from your fellow worker, nothing absolutely can not mean to the kid in 3 years who told you it in a garden.
Is a pity, as comes to tutors, and managers to mind so late to begin to solve a problem - when already complaints arrive and as a result as it was already told to drive the child out of a garden in “special establishment“. And where work on settlement, both prevention, and explanation, and games and so forth?
For some reason I noticed a strange thing - nobody hits back now! It became a rarity! Wonder simply. But the most popular way of protection - the COMPLAINT. The tutor stands up, of course, when already someone to someone “vdarit“. Then it is time: “go - here, now we will tie you to a chair!“
Is simple and for fighters it becomes sometimes offensive. All people different. Kids all with different temperament. Why we wait that around our child all will be tikhinky and poslushnenky. And how to it to cope further in life? To resolve issues, to learn to open a mouth for conversation with each other, and not just for the complaint? Here I do not take 2 letok, of course. But is more senior - that children!
the Example in our case (and why I actually so am upset): On us the complaint from “parent“ arrived. I was told “to do something“, otherwise... literally “last year they had a case... You understand, we had to ask to take away the child“.
U us the remarkable child 3 - x and a half years, as well as at all loving parents. Hyperactivity only. Life is in full swing. It is more than enough of energy. Group of uneven-age from 2,5 to 6 years - lyceum.
So... In a garden window at PTA meeting incidentally I see, Nastya (5 years) to ours (3 years) behind creeps and pulls a hood. That falls, turns around - nobody. In a minute it with the girl (too very quiet and obedient) together again to it and for a hood, it falls, rises - Nastya is enough its bucket and throws aside. Ours swings fists, and here I hear shrill squeal of Nastya towards the teacher walking absentminded: “You look, and Anton beats me“. Second girl for some reason: “Yes, it to us prevents to play and everything selects and pulls a hood“. Ours with the torn-off hood silently continues in the face of the tutor and the grandmother who suited Nastina (as in time she approached!) to lash out at “lovely Nastenka“ with fists and pushes her on the earth with the words “I Will Kill You“. Final: Nastya`s grandmother: “Ah you are a fighter unfortunate! Who you brings up it! It understood THAT for parents! I now in militia will take away you.“
Ya I go outside to me Nastya (5 years) jumps up: “Your Antosha of all offends and everything takes away from us“. Teacher to me: “It is necessary to do something, complain of you“. ß: “What did you do not see how business was?“ It: “all children at me walk normally. Nobody to it climbed. And it offends Nastenka all the time!“ Already it has problems in group of no
. Everyone happens, of course, but it is already our task. And Nastya now in group is called “gangster“ because when Antoshka was ill 2 weeks, and without him she perfectly suited a couple of good fights. Only her grandmother does not trust:)
23. 1. 2001 15:9:58, Natascia Kirienko
- Ya I am the fighter`s mother. Us drove out of one garden (logopedic). And everything is amicable - parents, tutors, the manager. It is a pity for this unfortunate Dima who was already suggested to be sent to a mental hospital. It would be desirable to know opinion of parents who are on other side of barricades. What to do how to behave and who can help us (3. The 5th years, the psychologist does not take, tells small). There is no pathology in this sense, well active, well as everything, the normal boy, but fights.
23. 1. 2001 15:52:46, Nadezhda Nadj`s
- , such “active“ as ours, unfortunately neither tutors, nor other parents love. Tutors want to facilitate as much as possible to themselves life. Of course, it is easier for them to cope with appeasable children - in a day you are so run - than to bridle the fidget. And there is one, with it everything goes not so. Too you will not explain to parents with everything that not from the evil it it. It is not necessary to attribute everything to aggression. We with you know the children! And other mothers want that did not disturb their children, and it is clear too.
23. 1. 2001 17:24:36, Natascia Kirienko you Know
- , humanity and in chelovetsekh goodwill - it is good, of course. But it is impossible to make happy all. I am concerned first of all by my boy. And when I will solve its problems - then I will sympathize with poor mother whose son, probably, for days watches any animated cartoons about the ninjia and action movies bloody. If I find
for what to sympathize...
20. 1. 2001 23:31:44, the Small piece of ice
- Ya mother of the boy who likes to play with knives, to fight and. etc. Very active. Animated films I to it choose
, any it is not bloody animated cartoons, but kind and good, houses it love all also it in soul, I know, very vulnerable, kind.
Is simply a pity that you all on one comb. It is developed better than many children, but from where it undertakes - mind it is not applicable. Just they are so feelings sometimes the express, can from a surplus of feelings, and in general I always (and strangers too) perceive children in an amicable way - children are children) and I try to my kid about others only good to speak.
25. 1. 2001 14:47:58, Natk
- be not upset. It is unlikely will allow to do to your kid real harm. In the same place there are adults, they observe. With if proceeds so, this Nikitka will begin to understand that he only worse does to himself. It is unlikely will want to play and be on friendly terms with it. It just in game will not be accepted. There is a chance further that it will not be pleasant to it. You want to play together, you will understand that so it is simply unprofitable to behave. But it gradually, to the senior groups.
1. 2. 2001 10:4:6, Natascia Kirienko I understand
- Ya - boys - they are everyones. War game there, fights and other... you - that though competent and “thoughtful“ - about the boys somehow think, try, and all at you and at us will be good. The world needs both “conquerors“ and “builders“.
But I sat in group in the evening and have a look at Nikitka it. We played with it a little bit. The boy it was a pity - he not for that that active... It is just communicatively inadequate. It does not support dialogue with anybody nor on any subject - the second phrase at it - type - “I will kill you!“ - it is quiet, but is persistent - and it is followed by several sovaniye a fist in air or in a nose to “interlocutor“.
Noisy, the habalisty young, well dressed mother, with the person who is not burdened with intelligence. Style of communication at people such: “Well you che! died there perhaps?? put on, pancake, on - fast!!!“ . I do not know that there alone.
Boy difficult. It is a pity for him, but... But too it is a pity for the children. Generally, not the monster, and small nervous malchishechka this Nikitka. But to explain nothing to his mother - it is clear...
Well and god with them...
30. 1. 2001 10:25:39, Small piece of ice