Rus Articles Journal

If the parent in a depression. Chast2


, the parental depression is How harmful to the child, depends on his age. If the maternal depression coincides with development crisis, then this crisis will worse proceed.

During the periods of age crisis the behavior and ways of perception of the real world sharply change, the person has to seize new skills and very much needs support, acceptance and understanding. And mother herself needs the help and is not capable to give support to the child. Then it becomes uncontrollable, demanding still big physical and moral efforts, and there are no forces. Mother feels irritation, fatigue, then deep feeling of fault - the vicious circle of interferences turns out. The importance of maternal depression as society expects responsibility for education of the child from mother is not incidentally emphasized. The father is usually a little more detached from children. If as a result of a depression the father moves away a little stronger, but mother is capable to compensate it, then accident for mental development of the child will not be. When mother gets sick, interaction in a dyad “mother - the child“ which for mental health of the child is the major is broken. Besides, children usually personify a problem:“ If mother does not want to see me - means, I am bad. If she cries - means, from - for me because I behave badly“. And so - for a long time. The child is convinced that he is not fit for anything.

If the father in a depression, a lot of things depends on how the wife, the child`s mother, treats a depression of the husband, that is father. It is possible to consider that the father got sick, he needs to be helped, then all family gathers, unites and survives in these difficult conditions. And it is possible not to see this depression, and to see that the father changed stood on the bad temper, ceased to arrange mother behind the closed door in a bedroom. Then it is possible to be irritated, angry and call in allies of children. Still it is necessary to consider that the father having a depression is perceived by children and the wife as the person who lost prestige. Any person in a depression becomes helpless, weak, but in case of the father of family it seems absolutely inappropriate and inadmissible. In addition it is almost completely switched off from family life.

Indifference of the father is very heavy

. The child does not receive from him either support, or a response, or anger when it is required, either necessary punishment, or encouragement. At the child all ideas what is possible and that it is impossible are displaced. The childhood - time when children acquire any norms. Valuable orientation of a family - because of what there is an idea of the person of what is good that it is bad in this world. The relation to it of parents plays a huge role. If the child observes an absolute indifference, then ideas of the good and evil are formed at it not up to the end. We speak about sincere deafness, perversity and all the matter is that during formation of moral concepts the father or mother were in a depression.

Parents, losing ability to give to the child support, cause in the child... depression. It is necessary to tell that if it is about the kid - the preschool child, then a consensus at doctors whether the child can have a depression at this age, no. Long time a depression and children were considered as concepts absolutely incompatible. The child is a pleasure, activity, a spontaneity. The attention of researchers was drawn first of all by often ill children. It turned out that the increased uneasiness, timidity, difficulties in communication with other children, whims, aggression are inherent in them, they difficult endure separation from parents even for insignificant time.

Children are very sensitive

to family problems even if parents sort out the relations not at them. They do not know sense of these problems, but sharply feel discomfort and answer it or whims, fears, frequent colds or enuresis, etc. At children it is possible to speak about the full-fledged developed depression in case of teenagers.

At teenage age depressive frustration are shown by

very often, and for the last decades their steady growth is observed. Complexity of early recognition of teenage depressions is noted by many researchers, pointing, in particular, that the first symptoms of a depression are very similar to manifestations of crisis of awkward age. Psychiatrists and psychologists are uniform in an assessment of the early teenage period, including it “revolt time“, behavioural experiments, emotional turmoil, changeable mood, a negative self-assessment, reflection, dramatization of events and hypersensibility. It is one of the most important and difficult crises of development of the personality which problems - formation of the main personal qualities, assimilation of norms and rules of social interaction, search of the place in society, critical revaluation of family values and rules, etc. Besides at this age there is a powerful hormonal reorganization, appearance quickly changes, there are unfamiliar concerning feelings in a body. All this is rather big load of mentality.

at this age the depression is so considerable

and imposes a noticeable trace on further development of the personality; displays of a depression are fixed as a way of response to difficult situations that in the future forms depressive type of the personality.

Two features of behavior of mother do

of the child the identity of depressive type: hyper guardianship and absolute indifference. And that, and other style of education can develop under the influence of a depression at mother. There is nothing bad neither in the sponsoring behavior, nor in severity if they are combined with other forms of the parental relation. The depression does them by the main, unchangeable forms detsko - the parental relations. Maternal hyper guardianship leads to the fact that the child is not capable to independence, understanding of the desires and aspirations; the passive position, total inexperience in the relations with world around which increase already available dependence is formed and involve development of a depression. At the second option of maternal behavior the child since the early childhood is brought up in the atmosphere of deficiency of maternal love and attention, in combination with tough schemes of education and restrictions. At the child the skills of behavior connected with overcoming of difficulties, mastering new skills and new experience do not develop. The chronic feeling that you are not loved forms sense of guilt, the underestimated self-assessment. For such people is habitual, according to the education subsequently, to refuse the requirements and desires, an eternal caution on people around, and then a chronic dissatisfaction with life and the relations that leads to developing of melancholy.

Having a depression since early youth differ in

in extreme maximalism. Such person perceives himself as genius as the complete nonentity, people around - or extols, or in general does not consider for anything, falls into gloom, has violently fun. All this is very strongly endured, but also with the same force masks from all people, including the closest - parents. The feeling of discrepancy to an ideal and shame often push the child on acts which can either compensate, or hide “lameness“. The teenager with depressive frustration needs the fastest qualified help. He very much suffers and carefully it hides because considers impossible to admit to parents that there is with it something not so as the situation seems to it accident:“ It is better to die, than they learn all truth about me“. To great misfortune, depression episodes at teenage age sometimes come to an end with a suicide.

How to distinguish natural difficulties of awkward age from depressive frustration? How to separate personal features from a disease? What to pay attention to?

the need for a dream (more than 10 hours) Increases, it is very heavy to wake up, the child either is irritable, or is whining, and also is slowed slightly down (both reactions, and thinking, and the movement). Besides, pessimism, absence of sense of humour, inability to fun are peculiar to it; passivity, indecision, tendency to disorders and concern; excessive conscientiousness, self-criticism, concern in own insolvency. The teenager begins to skip classes at school, sharply reduces contacts with friends, is locked in the room or leaves the house at night.

Sometimes the child excitedly begins to look for philosophical bases of meaning of life, thoughts of hopelessness, inevitability of death appear. Teenagers plunge into the virtual world of computer games or the Internet and will see off there the whole nights. Sometimes complain that the head ceased to work that “forgot everything and I understand nothing“, spend behind textbooks much time and fall into blank despair from the fact that nothing is impossible. It is a so-called syndrome of “youthful asthenic insolvency“. It is supported with fear to cause anger of parents. Now in our society when education is so appreciated, there is a mass of schools and lyceums with the raised loading and requirements. Parents for the best quite often abuse the child even for the fours, saying at the same time that that will not be fit for anything if is not the best of the best. And it is difficult for the child, he does not cope with the program, besides parents paid such big money.

depressive frustration is shown by

At many teenagers in denial of the appearance. The discontent with appearance in general is characteristic of this age, but in this case discontent with the figure, features, occupies with the sizes of a penis or breast all thoughts and feelings of the teenager. The young man or the girl refuses to leave the house, insists on plastic surgeries, refuses study and communication with other people.

One more important and difficult aspect of life of the teenager - sexuality and the relations with an opposite sex. Very most part of depressive teenagers does not cope with experiences which are connected with new powerful sexual impulses, on the one hand, and social norms, traditions, myths and prejudices - with another. There are doubts concerning the sexuality, appeal, sufficient courage or feminity (sexual identification). Can sometimes say that the world as though not real, all as on a scene or the screen of the TV. Often they have a feeling that schoolmates or classmates suddenly began to treat them badly: only also wait when they are dishonored...

All these complaints and states require attention, goodwill, support of parents and are the reason will address the expert in the field of mental health. And depressive teenagers are just afraid of it.

Fear of mental diseases and, respectively, psychiatrists are very clear to

. Many years in Russia psychiatrists served interests not of patients, and the repressive state, placed healthy people in hospitals which served as some kind of prisons.

Besides, in our society it is considered that mental diseases are not equal to physical. It is a shame to have a mental disorder for some reason, and to address for relief of sincere suffering - weakness. There is no rational explanation for it. But if logically to continue this reasoning, then it comes to an end usually with the fact that it is impossible to admit to anybody the sufferings because people, even professional pomogalshchik are doctors, in this case will surely abuse your trust and in a back the knife to you will be thrust and there two times it is turned. For this reason many parents in our country are afraid to address the neuropsychiatrist or the psychotherapist, considering that they will only do much harm to the child. But hoping that all by itself will manage, they deprive of the child of the qualified help and aggravate a problem. Sometimes parents are afraid of tablets more, than displays of the illness considering that tablets change the personality, do the person weak and weak-willed. The same fears prevent also adults to see a doctor concerning the depression.

to Nobody now comes to

to mind to do amputation without anesthesia. And mental anguish during a depression happens not less intolerable and destructive, than physical. The delusion that antidepressants and other psychotropic drugs surely harm, leads to the fact that it is necessary to resort to medicines all the same, but in high doses and for longer period. Time of restoration increases, and the young man lags behind the peers, loses contacts, is forced to take the academic vacation. Not always, of course, it is necessary to run to the doctor if you feel depression, fatigue, alarm. If the person manages to distract from bad mood, to switch, then it means that the person owns a situation, but not the situation - of

If the person does not cope with life, then all fears should be thrust into a pocket and to go to confer with the expert. Here, as in any other field of medicine, it is impossible to self-medicate, being guided by indications of the reference book or information from the Internet. It is very important that the expert picked up individual dosages and combinations of drugs.

Every second young woman accepts some contraceptives. There is a lot of them, they interact with other preparations in the most difficult way. Besides, there is such medicine which we take, without noticing even that we take medicine - from a headache, for cold, laxative, antifungal preparations. In combination with psychotropic drugs there are most difficult interactions, often sharply pathological. Only the expert can consider all this.

Should remember

that the depression always comes to an end, despite sometimes long, long character. For many adults of its consequence are not so destructive, as for children. And if it is possible to wait a little with treatment of the adult, then with treatment a baby cannot be expected.