Rus Articles Journal

One and not houses

Sooner or later our children dashingly flutter out from a parental nest in independent life, and happens that the first trial flight is made towards summer teenage camps fashionable now.

Let mother will straighten wings

“, I want to have a rest few weeks on a beach“, - the daughter of 14 - 15 years says. Parents in some confusion - to release or not. It would be simpler to them to make up the mind to this step, be to the girl for about five years - six less - the teacher, dolls, a ball, the beach. And now - continuous horror - cosmetics, discos, boys...

the Main argument in favor of teenage camp sounds so: your daughter is at home under pressure of the parental authority who prevents it to solve her teenage problems. In camp among peers, free from your influence, she will spread wings, will learn to communicate with other people not as the child, and as the independent personality. She is eager to feel the feminity, it dreams to be pleasant to boys and to receive from it pleasure, but not to suffer shame and alarm. The company of age-mates - the trial ground for her charm.

“Here - here, - the vigilant parent will tell, - I also am afraid of it!“ So, most of all frightens parents that... she there with somebody will oversleep; she will be raped there, she is such trustful; she will catch a cold, will get poisoned with stale food, will break a leg.

When extremes are inappropriate

we Will begin with the main parental fear. If to the girl the idea with someone came to oversleep, it will carry out it also in the city apartment. The objection like “suddenly there will appear the bad company“ at once is swept aside at all - behind the worst company it is not necessary to go further the street or school. But as my acquaintance, the teenage gynecologist, among her young patients 14 - 16 almost tells years everything - virgins. Rumors about a loose way of life of youth are strongly exaggerated by our imagination.

Of course, maiden heart thaws from walks together along the sea, from daily meetings with the dear friend if that in camp appears. And unless you, mother, were another in 15 years? And at once strove to slip with object of the first love in bushes?. If is not present, then there is no need and to doubt the daughter. If yes, that your girl here at anything - you set an example to her which she will read “between lines“, on shades of your behavior. Even convince you her about “harm of early proximity“ for hours.

should not strictly forbid and scold in good time - the probability is high that from spirit of a contradiction the daughter will arrive just the opposite. Knowing it, some modern mothers go into other extremes - sending the girl to camp, they seek to prove to be so democratic that suggest to take with themselves packing of condoms. Mothers and fathers, do not go too far! She will apprehend your hint as the direct instruction to action:“ I am sent to camp that I there with somebody overslept“. And it is ingenuous as it is necessary to the obedient child, will follow your advice. And you wanted it?

Turns out just as in game - “yes“ and “no“ not to speak, black and white not to call. There`s nothing to be done. Such period at your daughter. It is necessary to reckon with its age. As the girl looks for new authorities, it is useful for you to ask for the help the close girlfriend or the relative. Let the adult mature woman will state in the form of real vital history protection elements from pregnancy and is sexual - transmissivny infections. Mother at the same time in the room should not be!

, as a rule, more fire are afraid of

of the Father that the daughter “neglected“ will go on a spree. Mother, but not the daughter has to finish it, otherwise all conversations will develop into infinite scandal.

do not go in pass after midnight

an Opportunity to turn into the victim of a sexual crime for the girl - the teenager it is very real, and not only in camp, but also houses. Only in 14 years it is possible to put on a skirt which comes to an end above pants, to make up lips red lipstick and, hardly striding on the legs which are turning in from not habit to high heels, to think that you draw man`s attention with the inhuman beauty. You will not set the seal to it: “Not to touch, there are no sixteen!“ And under a cosmetics layer it looks on all twenty five. The man suggests it “to sweep“ and flies into a rage because that he was prodinamit. And then these roaring frightened big children together with parents write the application to the militia for rape, and some militia lady with contempt notices:“ Itself is guilty“.

Most often annoying troubles occur at return from discos therefore in camp own amusements that the having a rest teenagers had no temptation to get away where - nibud have to be provided. And on discos of children have to drive literally a system, recalculating how many left and how many came. Be not surprised, in decent camps quite so and do.

Drugs nearby

Parents are for some reason so anxious with questions of sex that the most real danger is not noticed. And about it blow nearly at each intersection. Also it is called “drugs“. In any camp there is a chance to get acquainted with them. She will try or not, it will show your education. And I personally know several “the former vacationers“ who conceived a liking to smoke a grass in teenage camps. Someone begins there, someone continues, an opportunity is both for the first, and for the second.

it Should not be terrified by

. We live in such world. Therefore no information on the forthcoming vacation spot happens superfluous. I would advise mother with the father to learn on what disco of children from camp release, to descend there, and then to learn from acquaintances that for glory at this establishment. It is no secret that it is the simplest to buy a grass and tablets in such places. And it is the is best of all if the having a rest teenagers have fun behind a high fence in the close circle.

For safety reasons as often as possible visit the girl in camp - and let it as is wished rest. Come though on a half-hour. For communication it is not enough, but she also does not miss you. For control enough. Pay attention to her mood, health. You risibility or drowsiness, behavior as if have to guard not absolutely sober person in the absence of an alcohol smell. A bad sign - when ask money for food, Coca, ice cream and a chewing gum all the time. If the girl says that she would like to leave home, - take away at once, without understanding in what the reason, and without persuading to suffer and think, “money is paid“.

It is remediable, while the getting is good

the Camp is a tiny rehearsal of independent life. For parents - a fine opportunity to observe the teenager from outside, to see what difficulties the daughter faced, and precious chance, literally one of the last, to correct something. Certainly, you estimate results of the long-term education.

But happens and so that the child is extremely unstable and we depend by nature. And congenital dependence all the same what to cling to. It can be drugs, cigarettes, boys, food, alcohol. Parents very much tried, but owing to genetics education did not work. It is well, better to catch defect of the personality in 15 years and to work over it year - another by means of the expert, than to find in twenty five. Then something to change opportunities at you will not be any more.

When should not go to camp

If your daughter is in acute teenage crisis, overwhelmed by spirit of a contradiction and call, - do not release. Our neigbour made such mistake - absolutely intolerable, constantly rowing to parents girl insisted on departure from the principle, not really - that and there was a wish, but to spite of mother with the father.

In camp it it became insufferably boring for

. Besides what was spoken at home about a disco - “muck“, so still the forbidden fruit actually appeared muck. She secretly bought six bottles of beer, drank, became tipsy and in four mornings at dawn trudged to the Gulf of Riga to burn. Fortunately, so far she went on our cold shoal to the remote place, sobered up and dared to wait for girlfriends - rescuers. But it appear where - nibud nearby the bridge over the rough river - quite could under the influence of a minute “that to you, to reptiles, it was bad“ and to jump.

Should not spend vacation at a camp to the girls overwhelmed by an inferiority complex concerning the appearance whether it be the nose length, curvature of legs or excess weight.“ Ugly ducklings“ are capable to do a heap of nonsenses, having met the first young man who will be pleased. Out of gratitude they are ready to oversleep with anyone, are glad to get drunk and pass on a rope - if only forgave them seeming “uglinesses“.

At tender maiden age cannot look worse than others. It leaves embitternment and feeling of abjection for the rest of life. Therefore, dear parents, as they say, on clothes stretch legs. If you hardly scared up money for prestigious, expensive foreign camp where the girl will be dressed worse than others, will not be able to buy ice cream, additional excursion, - refuse the invention. Let will better have a rest in a habitual situation on a native beach.

If the family budget does not pull

and it - it is impossible to equip the girl adequately in any way - there`s nothing to be done, let has a rest in the city, but does not feel defective and second-grade. As for intestinal infections, food poisonings, colds, changes and other - do not worry. Advise the daughter at the first symptoms of a disease - whether it be nausea or a sore throat - not to suffer, not to self-medicate, and to rush to administration - let take measures and to call you.