I ask for suggestions
For a long time wanted to pass an opinion on the situation.
So, 8 years ago I arrived to Moscow from Tashkent with the child. She was married 4 years, the husband, unfortunately, died after already divorced him. The husband was the remarkable person, but had alcoholism.
I live Now and I work in Moscow. By profession - the psychologist. However I live together with the parents, and it is my main problem. There was no psychological birth. There are no resources to rent certain apartment to live separately with the son.
a certain professional progress Is. Endured a lot of things, comprehended a lot of things.
I Meet two years the man who never was in marriage. But it is impossible to establish a family everything somehow - possibly, from - for strong dependences on parents (he lives together with the in one apartment too). >
it would Seem to p - exit to rent apartment together, but constantly something interferes with it. In a word, I understand that obstacles generally in the head. Ideally it would be desirable to kill two hares - to marry and leave parents. However there is a dependence on the husband now.
to me 35 years, to my son Mikhail 11 years, to my Nikolay were executed 38 years recently.Strong, persuasive affection for parents haunts
any more. I understand that, perhaps, neurosis developed.
Outdoors I feel confident as the adult, at work - the professional, and is worth turning out houses - at most 16 - the summer girl to whom the strict father or mother do remarks, impose the opinion, break borders, interfere with education of the son. It is clear, that actually they want to be helped. But I am for a long time not a helpless child.by
Ya it is rather socialized, I bear responsibility for the acts etc. Eventually, me bothered to justify itself before all for the slightest action. At the child already it developed incorrect idea of a family... It has difficulties in communication with peers, I am ready to help it as mother, as the psychologist, but continuous intervention of parents already got me!
Nikolay, seeing my dependence, denies the though, by and large, “is married“ to the mother.to
Ya she is familiar with his parents, he knows mine, but we cannot reach agreement in any way.
in the Summer of this year lost the general child (the stood pregnancy). The lion`s share of experiences at the very beginning of pregnancy concerned a housing problem. Nobody wanted to concede. Our parents and are unfamiliar with each other though they nearly became grandfathers - grandmothers (mine for the second time).
of the Relation last... It would seem, here - here something will be solved, but again something disturbs. Such state of affairs very much irritates. The child will not understand too when we get married with Nikolay, to him - that is thought that we love each other.
of the Relation proceed so: we with Nikolay occur for the weekend either at me, or at him (and at him generally in a summer season when parents go out of town), together we go to have a rest in the summer in holiday, together we meet New year (as a rule, in boarding houses where there is a fishing). My son for New year remains with my parents. I as exemplary Father Frost (Snow Maiden) leave for him a gift. We go three together to the cinema, a zoo, on picnics.
Now the situation was complicated by the fact that “my strict father“ forbade Nikolay to remain with me night. Silent war began. It is necessary to convince every time it of that it treated everything quietly. To tell the truth, when my darling comes, we put the child to sleep to the room of parents...
I Ask for suggestions...