Rus Articles Journal

My late happiness of

In our family all equally: there is a son - the teenager and the tiny daughter; my beloved husband - the pessimist, and I am a desperate optimist. I as a small stubborn engine push the cars. It is possible, I will stand at your station and I will a little puff a bit while nobody hears?

Today my low-emotional husband, ironing on our 11th monthly daughter, told: “I do not represent, as if I lived without it!“ At me wings grew behind the back, and I mentally flew up with happiness: “He realized that he means to be the real father!“

History of our family very old: we got acquainted at school, I waited for it from army, then a wedding, the son Nikita`s birth, by the way, is important for our story that to it now 15 years. A happy family, you will tell and if... I desperately wanted still children. And my kids did not want to be born in any way. Five painful times I lost them. Five happy opportunities, five hopes and bitter disappointments...

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Ya it was persistently treated for everything that was offered by doctors, melted on the account in the different medical centers, but the reason was not. One kind aunty is a doctor told: “To you already 38, you have children - do not torment yourself and us“.

Ya thought: “All right, I will try once again and I will calm down, and that already began to notice on streets only pregnant women and carriages!“ Nothing left, there came February, and I went to business trip to northern districts of the region. We were unsteady on windy roads, sat in cold offices, at night wrote reports. I felt disgustingly, but doctors told “no“, so it is cold and nerves...

to

my Friends, trust in miracles! They happen quite often! Miracle! I - am pregnant! “You will have a child!“ - told me, and I immediately laid down on preservation. Solved:“ To nobody I will tell nothing, even to mother, they had enough of experiences for me“. Also the husband gave a surprise, calculated how many to us will be years when our kid graduates from school and decided that we already old, and children to us, as if it is softer to tell it, are not necessary more... Was afraid, probably...

the Fear and strange things waves covered with

me all 9 months of my long-awaited happiness. I went for ultrasonography, and there found an umbilical cord cyst, appointed control research. Two weeks I lived in fear, did control, and cysts did not find. But found a problem of kidneys at the child, control again - and again everything is all right. Ten ultrasonography - ten pleasures and chagrin. All my world against me. Mother is afraid, speaks:“ Why to you it is necessary“. The husband is silent.

my

the beloved son, having reached teenage age, endured a stress - in this world it any more one, there will be someone who will take away the love and attention put only to it. I convince him, I draw happy pictures of the childhood, but his imagination is strong - is firmly closed, there are examples of friends and schoolmates: “I will be necessary to nobody any more!“

It is fine, a family! I will tell nothing to you, neither about ultrasonography, nor about the fears. “My baby who you are: daughter or sonny? Only keep, do not throw me, I so love you!“

the term of childbirth Comes nearer, on the last ultrasonography I learn that there will be a girl. And again something not so, analyses fine, and I feel disgustingly. I go to hospital. Cesarean section: do an epiduralny anesthesia, doctors smile, the daughter shouts, to me give it to kiss, to put to a breast. The child is healthy, 9 points on a scale Apgar. In 3 hours my chamber includes the children`s doctor and says that to my baby it became bad, it is taken away in children`s reanimation, and I remain.

God forbid to nobody to endure

these terrible days. My Sashenka in hospital, and I here, in maternity hospital, will also be 8 more days, will not remove seams yet. Bring to mummies to feed kids, they are happy, silly fellows, show me, look supposedly at us at that and se... I look, I smile, then I leave in a corridor and quietly I howl in a corner. How so? Why?

Thanks, the husband grew wiser, runs in reanimation, it is let, calls, tells that the doctor told. Thank you, great doctor Kokshin Dmitry Vyacheslavovich! Have you ever seen anything like it, the manager of children`s reanimation gives the number of the cell phone and allows to call!? Speaks: “The main thing - keep milk, we need healthy mother, everything will be good!“ And I am decanted each three hours when other mothers feed. The despair rolls waves, there is a wish to sleep and give up this occupation, but I maintain, I am written out, I go to the daughter.

She already waits for me, breathes, such beautiful, big-eyed. With other mothers it is fed the kids through a probe, every day we watch a weight increase. Also day when say to me that it is possible to give a breast comes. Here it, maternal happiness! The warm native lump sticks at once and gives smacking kiss. From this day everything at us will go well.

Now we are fine as though there were no gray days: the father walks with the daughter, rides on the sledge. By the way, Sashenka told the first word “father“, the brother of soul in it does not hope, learns to dance...

There now, my engine exhausted and swept further, and, you, readers of these lines, do not judge strictly.