Rus Articles Journal

My real father me is not present

U the father. In the childhood I did not know that it to go along the street which is lit up by a sunlight and, holding by a hand of the father, is proud to smile to passersby. I did not know that it will give a task to shout to the boy who is running away from me who just hit me on a back with a portfolio that I “will tell everything to the father it to you!“ I did not know that it is strong to embrace the young and strong man and to feel the children`s love which is completely protected and madly fallen in love by that which has no borders and descriptions it it is simple to eat because there is a father! I did not have all this, but I can tell with confidence that I am not sorry about anything because in my life there was other man who gave me all that my biological father who ran away from difficulties during the earliest and such vulnerable period of my life would not give. My grandfather was this person.

Moustached, gloomy, silent... Even in seventy years had no on the head of a gray hair, it was self-assured also to the correctness always! With it it was never cheerful and easy for me as with anybody and, he understood me on only one look, on one gesture. He repaired my broken dolls, I could always bring him the broken thing, and through a couple of hours he gave me it functioning. I never had doubts that my grandfather will always help me. He never felt sorry for me, did not protect from attacks of schoolmates and domestic friends, but was always near and encouraged me. It did not allow my spirit to break. And I never asked anybody to protect me because was able to make it independently initially. He taught me to it, without giving any lessons. Unless it is possible?

Ya liked to sit at it on a lap, rolled down from his legs, as from a hill. He taught my cat to focuses, she obeyed him and roamed behind him as a shadow. I and a cat constantly were in its room: I built houses for dolls, she lay at the grandfather on a lap and silently solved the cat`s problems.

Me sometimes it seemed to

that my grandfather - the sorcerer. He expected foreign death, he expected also the death, and spoke about it so quietly, surely and without regret drop. I did not know about it, learned later. Perhaps, I would manage to set then to it several questions, important for me, though... Perhaps I had no need to know all this. Why the nobility when you die?

When the grandfather died, my life in one day was left by the childhood. I matured and became other person. In my life there was no most loved and native one any more, there was no best friend any more, there was no silent tutor and my real father, not biological.

From that day there passed more than eleven years, but I still never and for any leaving I so did not regret feel its presence near myself, as about it... Or perhaps it also did not leave at all, maybe, it somewhere nearby...