On pages of magazines for parents the summer usually appears as time of happy family rest, joyful communication of adults and children. But actually the summer becomes frequent also time of partings: there was an opportunity to send the child to children`s sanatorium, appointed planned inspection in hospital, sharp intestinal diseases and injuries become frequent, unfortunately, at this time... Generally, pertinently to talk about a psychological state of the child who is pulled out from a habitual situation and placed in a situation hospital. And to tell about how by means of games in puppet theater it is possible to heal the received spiritual wounds. >
For me for many years remained to i a riddle why my daughter in the early childhood so was afraid of people. She even to close relatives did not go on hands and began to cry if on it too as it seemed to it, strangers stared. At night herself rocked to sleep: went down on all fours and, without waking up, with concentration moved a bed on castors back and forth. When at a bed the wheel fell off, my friends refused to believe that it made such tiny, in appearance absolutely helpless creation.
Later Christina conceived a liking for a swing. Other children will rock minutes five - ten and will get down, and the daughter stayed on a swing for hours, and it was impossible to drag her. It still shunned people. On my memory it was the only child who was frightened of Father Frost. When on children`s morning performance the young man who fastened a white sheepskin coat and a wadded beard tried to approach it, the daughter screeched and began to clamber on me somewhere up. And Father Frost so became puzzled that he forgot everything the humourous catchphrases learned the day before.to
A still to it dreamed nightmares at night. I understood it far not at once, the daughter was absolutely a crumb and could not explain why she is suddenly rolled up by crying and shouts without stopping minutes five, without hearing the words turned to it and around without noticing anybody though her eyes are widely open...But approximately in three years Christina`s character was sharply changed by
- it turned into the cheerful, sociable girl. Strangenesses disappeared. Remembering them, I only wondered: from where that undertook? And did not read in one clever book about a so-called children`s gospitalizm yet, did not come to my mind to connect behavior of the daughter with the fact that it right after the birth was several weeks in hospital without me.
Well, what, it seems, a difference to the newborn baby, where and with whom to be in the first weeks of life? He sleeps almost all the time. Care in hospital where my daughter lay, was quite decent, children were not left to the mercy of fate, in time fed, swaddled, did any procedures. But tiny, still, apparently, nothing emotional contact with relatives is necessary for not understanding creation. And simply speaking, maternal love which even the most skilled and benevolent nurse cannot test to foreign child. Not because it bad but because she is not his mother. And this love is necessary to the kid not less, than milk and dry diapers.
Shortage of emotional contacts injures the child, and he tries to compensate it by different means available to it. For example, begins to repeat the same actions which calm him. A typical example of such stereotypic actions - persistent rocking. The fear of communication, nightmares can be a psychotrauma consequence too. When the child gets to normal conditions, gospitalizm symptoms pass over time though as you could be convinced on the example of my daughter, it sometimes lasts for several years. > to Parents it is important to p to understand
that strangenesses of the child who visited early age in hospital - at all not whims. It is not necessary “to re-educate“ him: to hurry to disaccustom to hands, to drag from a swing, early to hide a baby`s dummy. On the contrary, such children need to be pressed more often to themselves, to shake, sentencing something silent and tender. As air is necessary for them physical contact with adults, is necessary much longer, than to ordinary children.to Preschool children too it is difficult for
For children the separation from mother usually is more senior does not play so fatal role, however good in it there is nothing too. So if you have an opportunity to lie down in hospital together with the child, do not miss it. Doctors can consider that there are enough your day visits, but it not so.it is the heaviest than
In hospital in the evenings when day vanity abates and the child is overcome by sad thoughts. It is good still if the nurse, having heard whimpers, approaches and will stroke on the head. And if, nabegavshis in a day, she with irritation shouts: “Yes stop to roar you! How many it is possible!“?
Turns out that at the most critical moment when support of the family is especially necessary for the kid, they are absent nearby. He feels thrown, betrayed or... guilty. Yes, many children in similar situations begin to think that adults left them, wishing to punish for some offenses.by
It is surprising, but there are parents who do not understand it. How many time had to be heard:“ Psychotrauma? Really! Our Sasha never even complained that to him in hospital is bad. Also did not ask that it was taken away from there“.
A at the kid or already in hospital, or shortly after an extract from it the dream fell apart, irritability, tearfulness appeared... And the fact that he did not ask home... There is one word which is very precisely reflecting a state of mind of many children who for a long time were hospitalized. Hopelessness. Feeling, unnatural for optimistical children`s age and therefore especially dangerous. If it settles in soul of the child, then leaves a trudnoizgladimy mark.
of Children, being in hospital, the fear of loneliness, monsters, death often torments. And children not always admit it. Sometimes because are afraid to mention about terrible once again, and at times out of pride.
Many parents say that their children, returned from hospital some “frozen“. Block, bezymotsionalnost - sure signs of the fact that the child endured a mental trauma. In this case it is necessary to stock up with patience and not to be annoyed if the kid does not support attempt to come to it into contact. In a habitual situation it a little - Pomala will thaw, and then it is possible to play with it the games helping to overcome fears.for fear
of Game puppet theater: on a screen (it can be built from chairs, having thrown over them a blanket) there is a hero - the toy of the kid suitable on a plot which is pleasant to it. One of you (either you, or the child, roles it is possible and it is necessary to change) drives and speaks for it, another gives cues for other characters of a scene. the First can offer
a plot about a puppy who went for a walk and was lost. How he feels? Who will come to the rescue of it and what history will end with? You should think up and play it together with the child.
Only try to fix attention not on Misadventures, and on Adventures of the little hero which by all means come to the end with happy finding of the owner. Give to the child an opportunity to dream up, but if he is at a loss (and it after hospital troubles is quite probable), you are not lazy to think out subject peripetias.When game will cloy
, offer another, psychologically more difficult. Let your child will play pass - the performance “The Baby Was Lost“. The scenario looks approximately so: your child saw the little girl in shop (she has to be represented by absolutely tiny toy that the child felt in comparison with it especially big and strong). The girl cries. The son or the daughter exorcise yours to it and understand that it was lost.Further actions of “actor“ have to
from game to game become more and more sure and resolute. Let at first it will just console the baby and will play with her until it is found by parents. Next time it is necessary to find out, where exactly it was lost and to take away it there where mother with the father will look for most likely the girl. Then let will approach with the baby the administrator of shop and will ask to call the girl`s parents on radio. These episodes will not only instill confidence in own forces in your child, but also will prompt him the correct tactics of actions in similar situations.by
of Game in hospital
As for actually hospital subject, it is necessary to affect her very carefully and only if the child does not oppose to similar game. Avoid direct analogy between the sick hero and your child. For a start better appoint the patient of some small animal. Then it is possible to play also people, but having changed a situation on opposite: let will put in hospital someone from adults, and the child will visit him, to bring gifts, to look after, encourage.
Development of “the kind line“ in game is very important because having suffered much, the child can become hardened. Many children begin to behave aggressively though before hit in hospital behind them nothing similar was noticed. Certainly, it is not necessary to allow the child to be rude and fight, but especially you should not focus attention on its tricks, in my opinion. If he was taken in hospital of obscene language (usually this fate comprehends preschool children), then in cultural families as a rule happens to explain enough that decent people so do not talk. Aggression by itself will come to naught when the child finds composure.
That there good?When your children absolutely “will thaw“
, it is possible to try to make the main hero of game not of the adult, and the child. Already your own. And to be fixed not so much on compassion how many... on the positive moments of stay in hospital.
- In any case good? - the child will be indignant.
- As that? - you object. - Bring to the patient any delicacies - time. Give gifts - two. Carry out his desires - three. And still... (especially it affects boys of 6 - 10 years) still friends respect the person who transferred such test. It is considered courageous and hardy - the real man! You that, you think, all such heroes, how are you? Yes in your class nobody, probably, were in hospital. And you already passed test for durability...
“Hospital games“ various. Here not the full list of subjects:
- implementation of a cherished dream (which, naturally, happens in hospital);
- of the house the baby discharged from hospital is expected by a tremendous surprise;
- in a garden or school to children are done by inoculations; all in horror shout and kick, and only the main character who got used in hospital to pricks behaves adequately;
- children in the yard argue on something that is related to hospital, but on ignorance talk nonsense, and the main character comes out from dispute by the winner then he becomes the conventional authority among peers.
Someone, probably, will think: “Yes unless boys, especially ten-year-old, play dolls?“ . I assure you: play and even very with enthusiasm! Only it is not necessary to represent it as a girlish entertainment. Tell that it is theatrical rehearsals, and suggest the son to try the hand in several roles at once: actor, director and screenwriter. Interest him, and it with pleasure will join in game. Especially as after hospital at many children some mental regress is observed: they temporarily become infantile, as if rewarding themselves for the fact that in hospital they had to face “harsh realities of life“.