Rus Articles Journal

My kid fell in love!


“And Sasha told today that he loves me! - it is boastful five-year-old Nastya reports. - He promised that when grows, he marries me, and every day will give camomiles! I love it too, and now we are a groom and the bride“.

For certain many of parents will lovely smile to

, having heard such statement, and will tenderly stroke the child on the head. If similar did not happen yet, be ready that the unusual feeling mixed with children`s naivety, pleasure and some confusion will come to life and your kid once.

As needs to react on new, still feelings yet not clear to the child? To abuse for silly chatter or to turn a deaf ear, without perceiving seriously told by the kid?

“The true tenderness you will not confuse

...“

by

By three years at the child forms idea of the one who is he is a boy or the girl. One more discovery is made by the kid - around there are also other beings, literally, from other planet and unlike it. Watching them, the child defines for himself an example of feminity or, on the contrary, courage. Of course, it is the spontaneous choice.

As sympathies arise? Sometimes not that another, but even it is difficult to explain to himself why suddenly misses a bit in a breast....

should make a reservation In advance: children`s love has nothing in common with sexuality of preschool age when own parents, but not friends in kindergarten become the first objects of sexual interest of the kid.

the Children`s love is not only first experience of relationship with an opposite sex, it also the real School of feelings at which kids begin to appreciate uniqueness of another and to learn the identity, learn to accept object of the feelings sincerely and disinterestedly. In a word, children`s love - a necessary component of harmonious development of the child, and without such peculiar “vitamin“ the further growing of soul is impossible.

during this period the child needs your support, he since the birth got used to listen to you and to draw for itself(himself) conclusions: whether well it arrives and as it is necessary to do correctly.

Parental approval or censure will by all means be reflected by

in the child`s attitude towards themselves and towards the people surrounding it. And how parents will treat the first children`s love, in many respects depends as there will be a further private life already of the adult.

If you laugh over experiences of the kid, then, quite perhaps, in the future he will begin to treat with neglect to the feelings, will cease to trust adults, and will avoid intentionally caress and tenderness, once in the childhood it was depreciated.

If show to

displeasure, but also you will abuse, the kid will forever remember what is love... In his consciousness it will remain near shame or maybe even a shame, that it is necessary to hide from all and first of all from parents.

If you begin to tell

to all family and friends about “the kindergarten novel“ and for fun to make plans for the future, losing the forthcoming wedding - at the kid the desire to share with you secrets can be gone. For it the first tender feelings - the most intimate secret, and the fact that he shared it with you - already an occasion to be glad. And there can be also more serious consequences. For example, having already matured, the child will begin to be afraid in panic that any his courtings will be regarded as “serious intentions“, and therefore will avoid the similar relations in every possible way.

Carelessly having thrown

to become sad “Juliette“ “Yes such Sash at you still you know how many will be?!“, you can arouse in soul of the child of doubt that love - not such and the value, and frequent change of objects of sympathies - a usual thing.

A if you patiently listen to the kid, then tactfully will help to understand that happens to it, will prompt how to behave with object of love, then he not only will gain invaluable experience in the relations with the beloved or the beloved, but also will see in you the loyal and reliable friend capable to help with a hard situation.

you do not hurry to call feeling of the child “love“. The kid himself also does not know that it happens to him therefore do not stick to it with silly questions: “You what, fell in love, perhaps?“ It is rather everything, the child himself will call it some another, the word more exact and clear to it. Ask on the favourite little man better. Thereby you will show the interest, and it will be pleasant to kid to tell what good girl Masha and as to them cheerfully together to play.

If the little son or the daughter call

what happens to them, love, do not exclaim reproachfully: “Yes it unless love?“ And you - that are sure that you know? Just children intuitively feel what is love, though cannot explain it so far.

“I know

, you are my award...“

Whatever, surely praise it.“ With what lovely girl you played in a sandbox today! As it is great that you have such girlfriend“! Remember that any your approval will give to still still timid gentleman of self-confidence.

Should not be expressed to

the opinion at once, over time the kid himself will understand whether it needs to continue friendship with the called “bride“ or not. Experience of disappointment and revaluations is also necessary, as well as experience of love. And the most important that already from early age the child did not doubt that any person chosen by it will be accepted by you without condemnations and critical remarks.

If your child wants to invite on a visit object of the love, do not refuse to it it. Perhaps, to you and not really - that is pleasant this boy or the girl, but interests of the child in that case above all. The main thing that the companionship passed on your eyes. You want to get acquainted with the girlfriend closer? Then you can suggest to bake together something tasty to tea, to think up fascinating games or to conduct tour on the house. It is quite possible that after such acquaintance you change the initial opinion.

of your kid invited to birthday to the favourite girl? Seriously treat the choice of a gift and a dress, each gentleman wants to appear before the beloved in a worthy look. Will not prevent to tell in that case about rules of etiquette and about that, to behave properly to be pleasant to the girl. Suggest to make something with own hands, it can be the drawn card or an original hand-made article. To the boy advise to present flowers to the girlfriend, at the same time teach them to choose and present correctly.

“With me here that occurs: to me my old friend does not go...“

the Bitterness of parting, rivalry and one-way love are familiar to

not only adults, but also children. So happens that the child is forced to move away from the beloved. Transfer to other group of a day nursery or kindergarten, moving to other city or the area can become the reason. Not similar circumstances which can separate from object of love for a while or even forever, and from adults depend on the kid. In that case children all the same can be on friendly terms, exchange calls and visit to each other.

If the real parting is inevitable

, help the kid to endure it. Notations and “useful tips“ (“And it is fine“, “Be higher than it“, “The girl has to have a pride“) will help a little. Think up better the fairy tale where her heroes come up against similar situations and learn to overcome them. As heroes dolls can act. So with your help and in a game form the child will find a way out of a fantastic situation and, perhaps, will understand how he should act in real life.

Separation - a heartrending experience for the little lover, also do not think that he will quickly forget about the hobby. As the melancholy for the former girlfriend or the friend will long proceed, in many respects depends on you. It is possible to hang up the photo of the friend in a nursery or to organize correspondence if you are in other city.

Of course, over time new firm friendship and other hobby will arise, but it will be later... For now try to do everything possible that separation took place softly, and in soul the kid did not have bitterness of loss.

your interest in feelings of the child and support will help to take the first steps on a love path. Ability to love and be darling - one of the most important in human relations!