Exit to the world: where and with whom. Part II
at teenage age through features of “border conflicts“ with parents. A basic psychological problem of teenage age just also is active formation of personal identity, and simply speaking - persistent need to answer itself a question: “Who do I am?“ At this time the teenager begins “to be broken out“ from the old hierarchical relations “the taught child“ - “the disposing adult“. He actively seeks to approve the horizontal relations with seniors, more adult and useful to its development, “personality“ - “personality“ unlike vertical (“senior“ - “younger“). The teenager especially quickly notices the former relations, unacceptable for it, and sharply “I“ react to them at the moments of violation by adults of borders its corporal or borders of the territory belonging to it.
For example, his irritation are often caused by inconsiderate touches of the parent who tries to correct the cap which is put on aslant without demand, in a different way to tie a scarf or to button. For the teenager these actions are not only rough invasion in intimately - personal space its corporal “I“, but also demonstration of the fact that parents perceive it as the small child - a particle their, being their property. A sign of small children is openness of their borders and corporal availability to parents.
Similar problems can be observed also concerning the home territory. The child is closer to teenage age, the more he emphasizes the importance of the door - border between the general space of the apartment and an entrance to its room if that is. If is not present - persistently dreams of own recess - a small world where there will be all the. Happens that the teenager, being proud of wit, hangs up the plate on a door of the room:“ The entrance is prohibited to strangers “or“ do not get - will kill“ - with a skull and bones, removed from an electric column. It it defiantly strengthens idea of a forbidenness, inaccessibility of the territory to all others, to those who “not - I“.
its room is endured by it as a projection of his personality which should be preserved against invasions as it is still fragile, insufficiently defined it is easy for stronger to destroy it. Besides, the idea of isolation and a zapovednost of own world first expressed as spatial inaccessibility to others is new and interesting to the teenager. The young personality should grow for a long time to reach understanding of an ancient Latin formula: I carry all mine with myself. For now the teenager fights for that his threshold was not crossed without demand, in particular that parents were knocked at an entrance and did not bring the order in its absence.
In some families of such problem does not exist at all - parents from the early childhood respect the personal rights of the child. But happens and vice versa. For various reasons parents can be not ready that in their family there was one more personality applying for equality with adults. Therefore sometimes parents break borders of the home territory of the matured child with the same aggressive demonstrativeness with what the teenager protects them. They do it to prove the determination to hold the power in the hands. It is necessary to tell that in these cases parents usually act under the influence of deep problems of the own personality which they badly realize, being covered with pseudo-rational explanations of the behavior.
In general and on several examples we discussed a subject of “borders“ and now we will pass to the characteristic of the second basic concept - the term “ways“.
in the Ways are called habitual trajectories of the movement which are chosen by a being, moving in space of the territory. It can be a forest track to a watering place, the path laid by domestic ants on a wall of kitchen or favourite routes of the child from the house to school and from school to the house. The way connects places which are the movement purposes. It can be characterized, proceeding from such properties as extent and convenience, a znakomost, safety when moving. The way per se as it delivers it various and pleasant experiences also can be of interest to the person.Someone will quietly run
by a smelly garbage can, without paying to it any attention, being guided only by one reason: here the road shorter and it is possible to reach a stop quicker.
Someone will go to the same stop in longer way if only to go on a beautiful path between lilac bushes, but not near a garbage can.someone will specially lay to
A a route through a garbage can that, passing by, at least inadvertently to look - whether something interesting that was not yesterday is not there. In this role there can be a younger school student, the old man or the builder of a country house - at everyone own interest though they are not a scum of society, spending the time on garbage cans is possible.
As is remembered by the reader, in R. Hert`s researches children marked on maps of the town all the movements during the day. This experiment, and also joint walks with children on vicinities allowed Hert to establish the important fact: not always children use ways which were paved by adults.Often the child finds
an own way to the right place and uses it rather regularly. From the point of view of the adult this way can be inconvenient, strange, and sometimes and is too long. And the child is attracted by an opportunity to creep in a hole in a fence, to pass along a ditch with tadpoles, to use the dangerous shaky bridge etc. On this way there will be both a sharpness of feelings, and an opportunity to observe interesting objects, and tests for dexterity and bravery, and communication with favourite places.
This &nbZsp; R. Herta will be coordinated with our supervision and researches. The difference in a geographical position and features of education in Russia and America is insignificant in comparison with similarity of the general principles of children`s territorial behavior. It is possible to add that the choice of this or that way at children (as well as at adults) can depend on a set of the psychological reasons also: moods, existence of free time, etc. In our researches it was found out that even the status of the child in group of peers can affect what road he comes back home from school.the fact that it goes in independently found way is very important
For the child. It is other, way, not such, as at adults, and even not such, as at other children. The child feels as the pioneer, an opener and the owner of own world. Though formally it is the same world where all others live, but it is endured as the world which is rather revealing the secrets only to the electee.
Happens that the child wants to share opening with the closest friends and to acquaint them with the experiences, but with bitterness finds out that not any person can share his delights. And even the most congenial partner will perceive something special in the surrounding nature. The thinnest intimate creative contact come by the child with the landscape which opened to it is deeply individual. In this connection the child really generates “the world“ where also what he sees merges together, and what he emotionally endures, thinks, dreams.This problem is very precisely described by
in the story of one boy which childhood passed in one of suburbs of St. Petersburg:
“Usually I went home on a stream though the road which conducted in the shortest way to the house was near. The stream was for me the whole world. In one place it was narrow, and it was possible to jump over it, in another - spread, and I thought out as to pass it. More than once I wetted legs there. Parents did not understand where I managed it to make, but not really abused.
On the parties of a stream. I saw at whom what grows that where blossomed and whether the oven burns.
This way I went always one. My attempts to show the stream to the brother were not crowned with success. To it it was uninteresting...“
Third and the last basic concept, characterizing the developed territory, is the term “place“. We will understand a certain locus of space (in Latin “locus“ is and there is a place understood as the spatial fact) where the being satisfies any requirements as the term “place“ and has certain feelings. In other words, it is subjectively significant, emotionally painted island in space of the world which the person visits for some need.
Concept “places“ rastyazhimo. Everything depends on in what coordinates it is thought. On the parent`s question: “Where we will go for a walk on Sunday?“ - the child can answer: “In park!“ In this case the park will be endured by it as “place“ in relation to city space in general. But, having come there, the child usually directs to the favourite places. For example, in the winter for it it will be the coast of the lake where there is a convenient slope for driving on the sledge and a good skating rink for descent standing. In the summer he surely at least for a minute will run on the iron bridge to feel how the metal flooring rocks and squeaks under legs, and then will go down under a dark arch, there, where it is slippery and damp to check what small insects and small fishes float in small water of the channel which grew with silt today.our supervision over children`s territorial behavior allowed to select to
the list of places which are visited by children.
In - the first, it is of the place of games. my schoolgirl psychologist N. G. Putyatova was engaged in mapping of places of games and entertainments of children of one of quarters of the city. It turned out that when children of younger school age leave to walk, they are inclined to be grouped in the same-sex companies which are located nearby from each other, but separately, and girls - in “school of balls“ play there the games, for example, and boys - in “knives“. That is children have constants (though externally in any way not designated) “girlish“ and “boyish“ game places. When girls and boys unite for the general game, for example in a hide-and-seek or in a tag, all group moves on the place which is in the middle between their habitual platforms. It is interesting that if the mixed group of children played more “boyish“ games, like Cowboys and Indians, it moved closer to the territory of boys. When game was more “girlish“, for example jumping through a jump rope (two twist, one jumps, the others wait for the turn), all moved towards the game territory of girls.
Besides, children have favourite places for certain games: > at a blank wall it is convenient to em to play in “school of balls“ in the yard where there are cars and stacks of boxes, - is where to hide; on the platform before school it is possible to chase freely one after another etc.
Other type of children`s “places“ is “terrible places“. They belong to the category of spatial zones dangerous, forbidden, alien to the child, but make among them special category. Usually children consider as “terrible places“ the closed spaces which are not lived by people: the cellar, an attic, an old cellar or a well, the abandoned house, etc. Entrances to these places become for children a common ground of the ordinary world of the child with the world other - mysteriously - the gloomy, inhabited unclear hostile forces living under inhuman laws. From them blows as a grave, and they cause existential horror in the child. But, as we know, “everything that threatens us with death for heart mortal conceals pleasure neizjyasnima“. Therefore visit of “terrible places“ is a special tradition of children`s group life.
One more view of “places“ are places interesting where it is possible to observe freely others life, undercover, unusual, not such, as at the child. Most often it is life or absolutely small beings (an ant hill, a ditch with tadpoles at which some children are ready to sit for hours), or, on the contrary, - big people who do not know that they look at them, and are busy with something interesting to the child (a window in a workshop where something is sewed, cook, sharpen, plane). Usually children like to visit such places without peers that they did not prevent to concentrate.
children Have also “haunts of vice“ where special needs are satisfied: forbidden is got or undue is made. The most typical place such is the dump.
As well as at adults, exist at children of the place of a privacy where will not disturb where it is cozy and convenient. It can be the individual place where the child leaves to endure offenses, to calm down, find contact with itself, to dream: the porch of the rural house leaving in a garden, a favourite swing, a planked footway over a pond, an arbor, etc.
of the Place of meetings, on the contrary, are the place of the general gathering of neighboring children, an evening sit-round gathering, heart to heart talks of the company of friends. They are chosen where it is convenient to sit, it is a lot of place, all it is visible and adults do not bother.
the Last category of places which it is important to mention - it places is existential - philosophical and religious experiences, independently found the child. Usually it goes one there to worry special a state of mind. Here one of examples:
“When to me was years eight - nine, I lived in Anapa. I kept the brightest impressions thanks to independently got experience - alone. I was captured by experience of a sunset which I observed, sitting on a big tower, listening to noise of wind in branches and inhaling a smell of a grass and the sea. These minutes I thought of eternity, of life speed. I was overflowed by feeling of participation in everything and grief. I remember it still“.
About all these places I was told in oral interviews or answering in writing my questions about one hundred people of different age and a floor. >
It appears p, as equally pulls children, and adults there where for them something necessary can be made and important. What moves them? Why they go there?can answer with
In a general view this question so: similar reaches for similar. Places, attractive for the personality, are points of a condensation of certain events, the relations, the states which are internally connected with those sincere problems which the person solves the life at present. Usually the atmosphere of such place symbolically expresses a certain key subject which the person aspiring there wants to experience. And the person (and it can be equal both the child, and the adult) mostly does not understand the reasons of the unexpected thirst for these or those places at all. He just feels that he wants there. Understanding of internal motives of the behavior even at adults can come in many years. It is interesting that it quite often happened to my adult informants in the course of the story when the person described events past. My questions forced to remember in detail what he never thought of. When the past came to life in the story, some people were lit up by understanding of why in certain moments of life they liked to be in certain places.
For example, the adults who are on sincere crossroads pulls to the places noted by transitivity signs: there something comes to the end, and something begins, it places of changes, transformations of one into another, places where the choice of the direction of actions is made, there are active movements, a current. There the person can experience deep dynamics of life, laws of its circular motion and eternal laws of life. For adults such places are piers, stations, intersections of roads, bridges, cemeteries, the rivers, the sea and, of course, churches.we Will take
by way of illustration the station. On business come there or those who already chose the way - bought the ticket and starts on the journey, or those who meet the coming people who reached the destination.
A here to endure the station as emotionally significant place and to visit him from time to time without the visible purpose, most likely, quarrystoneut people who are on the threshold of changes who want to change a current of the life, to jump out of a vital trap, to broaden the world, to endure spirit of those far places from where they come back together with passengers, etc.
we Will address certificates of those who endured it.“We studied
at university on the fifth, last year. Us was three girlfriends, and we usually came back from occupations together. Generally we should have parted already from the subway in different directions, but we could not leave. We very much worried on the fact that we will do after release - what work will manage to be found and as we will work if we are practically not able to do anything. It was terrible to leave in life as it seemed to us, absolutely unprepared.here we held
I the friend the friend, went, talked and moved such cheerful company to the Warsaw station (in that party lived alone from girls). Sat there in a waiting room on wooden sofas, felt that we do not want to leave, then went to the following station - Baltic. Was farther our purpose Vitebsk, there something was eaten and moved back: passed through the Moscow station and finished a campaign with coffee drink on Finnish. On this mad route left on four - five hours. It is good that else there was an early spring, predegree holiday and examinations not soon. The main thing that we made such strange travel on all stations of the city not once. Then we did not think at all of why there pulls us. Just went where legs bore. For some reason we at these stations very much liked to sit in a waiting room, we never went to the platform. Only later, remembering it, I with surprise understood, how precisely these sitting symbolically reflected our life situation of that time in stations“.“When I began to work with
, left in the evening home after nine. At work of the relation were not got on, it was lonely. The way home was remote, but I walked usually later to reach: at home was to many people, there is no place to get to, and there was no wish to come back there. Then I also had a strange habit on the road to do a hook and to come to the station. I passed inside, on the platform in any cold bought ice cream and ate it there, looking at trains and the hurrying people, and then went home. It is unclear, why I did it, but so proceeded till spring. Sometimes the thought flashed: as if all were surprised if they saw me here. The normal person will not go unexpectedly to such time for the station!“
The more mature is the personality, the better she realizes how on the card of the outside world which is spread around the invisible world map of sincere is imposed. Professionals well understand maps of the social world: practical psychologists, ethnographers, detectives, intelligence agents, writers - they have to know and feel those places which attract heroes of the vital plots studied by them.
Also and any person who traveled much, knows how for a short time it is possible to make idea of spirit of the city or settlement and of character of its inhabitants. Everyone has the strategy concerning what places for this purpose need to be visited first of all. One Czech fan of travel told me so:
“Having arrived to the new city, I go to three places at once - in church, on a cemetery and in restaurant. There I watch how people of this city lead spiritual life, what do they think of death and to the ancestors and as they have fun and enjoy life. Everything that it is necessary for me, I can learn in these three places“.