The child does not love morning performances? Whether
to children give pleasure to All participation in New Year`s morning performances and carnivals? Why some of them similar actions not to liking? How to behave that the child was not disappointed in a holiday? These questions in anticipation of New year concern all parents.
Always were and there are children who experience strong experiences on the fact that they should tell the poem at a New Year tree - before Father Frost or the audience. This prospect so frightens some of them that they do not agree to learn for anything even an elementary quatrain. But happens and so that the child with pleasure learned the New Year`s poem and suddenly at midpoint could not pronounce the word. The child forgot everything or did not find forces to overcome shyness. Why does that happen?
the Child can really become puzzled in the presence of a large number of unfamiliar adults. One business - to learn a verse and to tell his houses before mother, the father and the grandmother, and another matter - on a scene, before the audience. If at the kid similar experience of public statements is absent. The first part can pass far not so smoothly as parents would like it. But it is hardly worth considering it as a serious problem. Sooner or later children will get used to address other people. At least they will learn it at school when it has to answer homework to all class. Of course, professional actors or eloquent speakers they can not become, but not in this happiness.
Another matter when the child on a scene is held down by the most real fear. But it is fear already of a bit different sort - fear not of publicity, and a mistake. The kid is afraid to forget the poem or a song, to tell something not so or to make something not what is expected from him by adults. Perhaps, it is really possible to call such situation the most real problem which root should be looked for in behavior … parents! Yes, yes, parents often consciously or unconsciously form similar fears at the child. Usually it occurs as follows. The child needs to prepare the poem or to learn a song to children`s morning performance, and here mother with the father get down to business with all gravity. And as, they so do not want that their child “made a booboo“ before parents of other children. And, instead of trying to find thin approach to the child, to really interest him in the forthcoming performance, to inspire confidence that everything will turn out adults demand from the kid of faultless execution. At the same time, if the child does not cope, reproaches, intimidations and punishments can be used. The child begins to worry even more, at him any desire to act vanishes. Alarm that he will be punished or will abuse if he falters on a scene, seizes him. Naturally, such state does not promote storing and saddens all holiday mood. Even if the child will also manage under pressure of adults which - how to jag the necessary poem, then on a scene there can already be a failure - the child will just clog, at it “speech power“ will be gone for nervousness.you dance
, and I will manage...In kindergartens and schools such “rehearsals“ of morning performances quite often remind
rather a training, than joyful preparation for a holiday. Of course, here a lot of things depend on teachers, musical workers and other adults working with children. And, unfortunately, at some of them best of all it turns out to intimidate the child and to inspire in him full uncertainty in itself, than to help really samoraskrytsya and to learn, for example, dance.
So if the child refuses to take active part in children`s morning performance, it does not mean yet that it the boy or the girl, socially not adapted or incapable of public statements. Do not try in all ways to expose the kid on a scene, and try to understand causes of failure and experiences of the child. Perhaps, already fought any hunting to act even during rehearsal off it.
But sometimes and parents as soon as can, pile on the agony. For example, in one of kindergartens during morning performance mother, having seen that her boy dances together with other boy, began to be indignant and abuse strongly tutors for the fact that those allowed such “perversion“ (and differently could not be, in that group there were 13 boys and one girl). This mother attributed to such in general innocent situation the - the adult - sense. As a result the feeling of a holiday was spoiled at teachers and at mother. Naturally, the mood of mother was transferred also to her child.
New Year`s charms
New year - time of long-awaited gifts and pleasant surprises. But some mothers and fathers nevertheless manage to spoil feeling of a holiday to themselves and the child, and then they are surprised why the kid not also refuses to participate in mood in general fun. For example, rather unostentatiously, in process of approach on December 31 to remind the child that he did not forget to obey parents and to behave decently, otherwise Father Frost will leave it without gifts. And it is very easy for adult “to win“ Father Frost over if the child does not doubt his existence. “Father Frost gives gifts only to obedient children. He knows who as behaved this year, and to bad children will not come!“ - or “Father Frost will present a gift, only if your rhyme very much is pleasant to it!“ Quite often same way to influence the child is used by tutors in kindergartens and nurses. Sometimes such method of a manipulation the child is effective, sometimes - no. But than less child, especially he begins to be tormented with doubts whether he will really receive a gift from the kind old man and whether deserves it in general. Adults hit the nail - they “struck“ the most sore point of the child - his belief in the fairy tale and miracles. Now the kid is afraid to take an excess step which can be regarded by adults as incorrect. Than the holiday and day of distribution of gifts are closer, especially the alarm and tension at the child increase. And he perceives a long-awaited gift rather as the evidence of the obedience, than as one of pleasant rituals of celebration of New year.
By New year it is ready!
For adults readiness for a holiday is, first of all, a holiday table and a faultless dress on envy to all guests. But for the small child is always strong emotional experiences and mass of new impressions. And that these impressions were positive, the child needs to be adjusted on an event.Psychological training of the child for participation in New Year`s morning performance to parents needs to be begun with
with itself. To avoid problems and to turn children`s morning performance into the real holiday not only for the child, but also for all family:
- Think of why it is so important for you that the child acted. Whether you that he derived pleasure from own performance want or moves you parental vanity? You should not consider as if the fact that it is good to you, is good also to the child.
: and whether my child is obliged to learn actually verses for Father Frost, to represent the hare or to dance around a fir-tree? His future life does not depend on it and yours should not depend with it the relations. And forcing the child to do what is not pleasant to him, even from the best motives, vryad you will make him more self-assured.
- Even do not think to frighten the child and to blackmail, trying to force it to learn the poem. Father Frost (irrespective of whether the child believes in him or not) should not turn into means of manipulation and a symbol of pedagogical punishment.
- you Treat preparation more simply. Do not pile on the agony, do not exhaust the child house rehearsals and morals. If to turn tiresome learning into fascinating game, most it will become interesting to the child.
- you Remember
, not all children are created for a scene. It is clear, that public statements need to study. Besides, many children need to work hard over themselves to overcome fear of a scene. But it cannot be made for 1 - 2 day on the eve of morning performance.
- Therefore keep in mind
on the future: if you want to bring up the free child who is not afraid of a scene, do not limit a circle of his communication. Let talks to children and adults, addresses during a family feast, in the company of the friends or in the yard local grandmothers (of course, it should not act not from - under sticks, and at own will). Do not forget to praise the child for any his initiative. If the child during morning performance suddenly begins to cry or will rush to you on hands, do not try to push away him and any ways to return on a scene. Put yourself on its place - to you terribly, watch several tens unfamiliar eyes at you, the unclear grandfather with a beard demands from you the poem and even native mother cannot rescue you from this “nightmare“.
- Always try to find time to visit morning performance with participation of the child. Small children address first of all not audience, namely the mothers and fathers. Pay attention: when the child acts, he looks to you in the face, looking for in them support and approval. And now present that he will have nobody to look in the face.
- I do not forget
that New year happens only once in a year. But it does not mean at all that the child has to as adults to celebrate a holiday in a big way and to have a really good time on morning performance. Allow it to stay just by itself at least once a year even if for it an opportunity quietly will become the highest happiness to sit out on a stool until the end of morning performance.