Let`s play with you! (continuation).
the beginning of article it is possible to read here .
3. As well as why psychologists play with children of
Watching games of children, psychologists noticed long ago that the child most often loses those stories in which his deep experiences and the internal conflicts are reflected. And though game is inherently symbolical, feelings which in it appear are real and very similar to what is tested by the child in life. Expressing these feelings in game, the child has an opportunity in some way to resolve the conflicts and to build the relationship with the world more structurally. Game, thus, becomes external expression, the picture of an inner world of the child; a window through which we can glance to this world. Besides, interacting with the child in game, correcting the relations between characters, their behavioural reactions, we receive a way to change inefficient, destructive behavior.
not to be unfounded, I want to give several examples from own practice.
U me the set of toy figures of the small size is. There are most different toys: figures of people, animals, structures, transport, furniture etc. Using these toys, the child can simulate any reality
Ya I ask the little patient to choose figures which to it were pleasant and to build on a sheet of paper the magic country or the world for children is more senior. Then I ask to tell a story that just it turned out or to play a sketch.
Here 8 - summer Andrey. In its magic country main - the king living in the lock one without friends. Citizens constantly betray it, arrange plots, spin intrigues. The king should be on the alert all the time, he never knows who will betray it following. (In the boy`s life often offend at school). The king cannot cope with the enemies. All the time someone has to help it. While casual people solve for it its problems, the king tries to have a rest. However again there is a plot, and at the end of the game the king appears one in a clean floor, feeling infinite fatigue.This boy is quite trustful
, however, it is lost in a situation of general attention. It is dependent, we depend on others, it constantly needs the help and support. He hardly controls itself(himself), quickly is tired and on this background rastormazhivatsya strongly.
Here the girl, studies in 1 - ohm a class. In game Ania is a hungry evil Baba-yaga, constantly strives to eat a goat. He very much - very much is afraid, he is too defenseless and helpless, and the Baba-yaga is almost all-powerful. In this game there is a lot of fear, anger and in general very strong negative feelings. Ania in a whisper talks, children in group sponsor her, she is afraid of everything, especially she is frightened by nightmares.
I, at last, last example. Zhenya, she is 7 years old. She is live, emotional, dreams much. At the same time it is infantile, egocentric, it is difficult for it to constrain the desires and to concentrate on something one. On reception she constantly asks my permission, to make something though we agreed with it that she can afford a lot of things here.This moment explains with
to me a piece of a game situation. Zhenya built the apartment in which there lives a little girl. I am interested where the girl`s parents. Zhenya carefree answers that they left for work, to it without them it is good because they forbid it to drink milk which she very much loves. However, then it is hurt by a stomach. I ask whether the girl why she is hurt by a stomach knows and I receive the affirmative answer.
Zhenya understands that it is impossible to break bans of adults, however, very difficult to be kept by it. Perhaps, there is too much these bans, and such situation forces Zhenya to remain small. One more moment in work with Zhenya illustrates my statement about a possibility of change of a situation with the help of game. At one of meetings there is a little bear with the friends who protect him from other toys which offend a bear. I ask: “How they offend“ - “They tease it, say that he small and knows nothing“ - whether “The bear can answer them?“ - “Yes, I - good, all say to me around that I good“, - Marrying tells these words the lisping tone, really as the small child. I pay its attention to it: Whether “The bear can tell it as the adult?“ We try several times and, at last, at Zhenya it turns out:“ I know that clever and good“, - she speaks with confidence, with advantage. At this moment the child becomes really a little more adult, it already less needs an external assessment.the Conclusion Such moments are important and interesting to
to me. To me every time happens surprisingly and to fascinatingly learn the child, to establish with it close relations. And not too much for this purpose is necessary. To you as to parents, it is worth looking narrowly more attentively at childish sports and sometimes to participate in them. And then you are waited by the mass of opening about your child and the possibility of establishment of deeper, confidential relations appears. And if the child approaches you with words:“ Play with me“, you can begin with the fact that suggest it to sit near with it, without distracting on any another matters. And I am almost sure that you will surely become interested in the events and you will want to play too.