GV: the correction of mistakes of
(See the previous material “Reflections of Rational Mummy“)This article is addressed by
to the mothers who are adjusted on long GV, or already nursing longer than one and a half years. All underwritten represents personal experience of the author and does not apply for absolute justice for all mankind.
Probably, I wanted to be exemplary mother. Perhaps I gave in to fashion. I believed that children should be nursed that is thought so up by God, so, is not subject to discussion. I considered that GV - natural process, and it is much better regulated by the child, at least, because it is necessary to IT and as at most because he listens to himself, but not the aunt in a white dressing gown. I believed that the termination GV has to happen at the initiative of the child, as well as childbirth. Will come to nobody to mind just like that to stimulate them exactly in PDR even if the child is absolutely full-term.
generally, I and now agree with all this, having stopped feeding rather softly almost in 2,5 daughter`s years. Only thinking of the following child, I understand that I in the course of bringing up of the first did not consider one:. Therefore I decided to analyse our GV and to share experience with those to whom it is required. Unfortunately, - the third year of feeding it is more difficult to find information on the second, than about the first (except maniacal promises of involution), and it is necessary not less. whetherBegan
(the Chinese proverb)
By the beginning of our feeding I have no claims. Everything was easy and successful - it was lucky. Applying in the rodzal, stay in chamber with the child, feeding on the first peep, a joint dream (on which I was moved by the husband - and to us it, fortunately, approached), all “as is necessary“.begin
of the Claim somewhere from 3 - 9 months. More definitely I will not tell because I passed that moment when it is necessary to begin to communicate with the child, but not to put to it a breast at the slightest pretext. And if on the first year it had no obvious consequences, then on the second I received them at full scale. Having adjusted initially on feeding “on demand“, I too late understood that the child grows and to treat with one-year-old the same as the newborn, at least, it is unreasonable. I console myself in the fact that brains feeding flow away in milk - similar slowness does not want to be explained with other reasons to myself :).food of the feeding woman I will not be better to tell
of Missile defense because it was convinced only of one: the main ingredient of its diet - tranquility. All the rest should be done as is quieter. To me half a year was quieter (from 6 to 12 months) there is almost nothing. It became better for the child not, I reeled, as a result it turned out that everything Tuskina skin problems had in general no relation to food. But me it was quieter there are no potential allergens (which actually there can be everything, from apples to a turkey), than is and then several days with horror to peer into the child in search of hypothetically probable rash.Continuation
, and it turned out as always.
(V. S. Chernomyrdin)
to the child only in half a year, after sushka. We had late feedings up - months in 9. As I always gave a breast after feeding, we had no replacement of feedings also I to them and did not strive, for horror of our grandmothers. On the future, with the following child, would like to try pedprikorm, and more, probably, would not begin to change anything. The scheme fashionable now, generally, quite suited me.of
In spite of the fact that I gave a breast on the first peep, it was important to inform me the daughter that I give it or I do not give a breast that it WASHING, but not it. Again - it is more actual on the second - the third year of feeding when mothers are afraid of public reaction at overwrite by the child of her jacket where - or in public and requirements of “sisa“. We had no overwrite in principle, and my daughter does not know the word “sisya“ still.
Probably, it is my linguistic cockroach, but I am convinced that this part of a female body is called “breast“, and quite unambiguously explained it to Tuske. However, she preferred to call it “Am!“ “To!“ and “Maako“, depending on age.my child did not take
a baby`s dummy and a bottle (and parents did not insist), nasasyvy a finger with 2 - go on 12 - y month of life - then quietly ceased to do it. But to leave the child rejecting the decanted milk without food and me, I considered long time impossible.
the First time I left from the house without daughter in her 9 months and then preferred to these not to abuse. I for some reason considered that good mother - that which all the time with the child. We mastered a baby sling and successfully used it more than a year; leaving the child on grandmothers, suffered sense of guilt, did not recognize a garden at all (a subject of separate discussion, not in this article) and as a result I nearly received a nervous breakdown.Tusina
B year and eight I called from “Rozhana“ of the consultant for an excommunication which along with company “the baby is still too small, finish feeding at least to two“ quite sensibly explained that I climb on a wall not from feeding, and from the fact that except this wall and three more others, nothing in the life I see. And the child is put each a few minutes from - for the same.
as a result it was regularly decided to leave to me from the house without fail, and to drive the child on some developing occupations. It lasted approximately for half a year in which I even tried to leave to work for a half of working week. These days Tuska courageously kept, playing on nested dolls that mother leaves for work, comes back and milks. My heart trembled - that the child to whom two more were not executed won back the experiences on toys - I somehow did not expect it...
So lascivious mother came back home. Then the daughter told assured “no“ to razvivalka on which she ran with delight before and refused to leave. To Tusa it was executed two, and we decided to force slightly an excommunication because more nervous breakdowns somehow there was no wish.the Termination
as easy as shelling pears - hundred times...
Ya for rather long feeding. Personally for me (besides above-named) arguments about the fact that cubs of mammals leave from a breast when they reach a level of development of human 4 years were powerful. And very seductive the theory of “self-excommunication“ sounded. There was a wish to see it alive.
the First time my daughter reduced the number of feedings to two at dawn exactly in a year. Why - I did not understand, violently the breast did not offer, but when asked - gave without questions. We lived in such mode month then 10 teeth got at the same time, and we not only that returned to almost full GV throughout the day and nights, so also ceased to fall asleep without breast - earlier at us it too was not interconnected. Sometimes Tuska fell asleep after feedings, sometimes is not present - clapped eyes and fell asleep under lullabies. After a year it did not pass any more. It was necessary to fall asleep only with a breast and in any way differently.the Second time we tried to finish with
smoothly GV in Tuskiny two years. In addition thought of the following child, and before him there was a wish to take a small break for restoration of forces (I am not ready to a tandem in principle). And in general - convincing arguments somehow had the calming effect less, they were outweighed at one stroke by the indecent word which can be translated into the Russian literary language as “bothered“.
for this purpose since the end of March I began to reduce the number of feedings, distracting the daughter in all available ways, up to new toys after each day dream. I do not apply for correctness of this method, just at that moment I was ready already absolutely for everything for the sake of the good purpose to finish GV because... see above. Strangely enough, the child who did not move few months with “Mako earlier!“ in any, suddenly began to switch and forget quite appeasably about a breast enough for a long time. Gradually we managed to reach feedings only before going to bed (day and night) and couples of at dawn.became farther than
actively to be attracted the father. I noticed that in the afternoon Tuska in my absence can not sleep, suffering until receives a breast. As soon as I appear and I will milk - the child is cut down for a couple of hours though at six or seven o`clock in the evening. So we began to cancel zasypatelny feedings since evening - when dithat so taken off that will fall asleep anyway, not in an hour, so through two.
So, I began to leave in the evenings, leaving Tuska with the father. At the critical moment when there was a wish to sleep very much, and mother for some reason was not yet, they called me. Further I by phone began to read to the daughter verses monotonously. Especially well there was Gumilev and Eugene Onegin. The child was cut down minutes for 15, being sure that mother in the nature is, did not disappear anywhere, everything is all right, just with milk it did not develop today. At daybreak Tuska received everything put though she began to sleep better and even sometimes did not wake up absolutely so there was one - day - feeding in days. Dream, generally.
After two weeks of such life few times and me managed most to lay Tuska without breast - she just did not ask and fell asleep under the book. I finally believed in this moment that GV - requirement which will come to naught in due time because no habit so would disappear.
I here I decided that it is possible to leave for the night to the girlfriend. Unfortunately, I did not warn the daughter, and could explain to the husband when Tuska already slept. The child at six in the morning went to look for me, did not find, was strongly not glad. Naturally, that day there were two day dreams - well, from six - that mornings - and both with a breast... In several days Tuska suddenly fell asleep at eight in the evening, and we with the husband went for a walk, and she woke up. Behaved with the grandfather quite decently, ate, did not sob, was delighted to us, of course, soon come back. Only in four days I received a gift: two months of feedings on 6 - 9 times during the day and 2 - 4 more night. It was coincidence or a consequence of these two cases - I do not know.
In two years we had periods and more frequent applyings, just I already weaned from them, and sincerely hoped that the end of GV - here it, almost tangible so I was not ready to it “all back at all“. Business became complicated begun in the summer and the inevitable reference a countryside. That is already nobody could stack the girl instead of me.“ Rozhana“ claimed that it and is long-awaited involution and such intensive sucking proceeds few months, in rare instances - year. It for some reason did not please me any more.
Exactly in two months I reached that state that hardly restrained not to hit the beloved child on some of its soft (and not only) places. And then... remembered that the child can be distracted. And too, as well as in the previous time though it seemed that Tuska will not agree for anything - it worked...
Less than in a month we reached two - three feedings a day - zasypatelny and at dawn. Then I began to reduce duration of applyings, explaining that everything is eaten, a breast empty - here, look, touch. Then at dawn began to leave. I reached such handle that just spoke in the sleep:“ No, it is empty“. Tuska ached a couple of minutes and fell asleep. I apprehended it as the fact that the child in principle is ready to cancellation of these feedings, differently just like that did not allow to get off to me :).
A further character, and it must be said, the most very bad suddenly was found in our milk. When he was called, it suddenly began to refuse to come - and phoned to Tusa:“ I will come before going to bed “or“ now I cannot“. I together with the daughter explained to milk that Hanging out it waits, very much misses it, but could not do anything else.to me this accession to feelings of the child, their pronunciation was important
- I for myself do not consider accepted option when the excommunication passes without mother. To the child and it is so heavy moreover without support of the native person... And after two, in my opinion, the theory of mother`s departure does not work at the practician any more - the child suffers, and with return asks a breast on - new... Generally, we went some other way.
A then this capricious milk - you only think! - left to walk, and found little kittens who were left absolutely alone without mother. In this place my daughter demanded to give to kittens at least the father, I was not against. The father a cat was together with kittens and ate sausage in one muzzle - his children were such small that sausage is could not yet.
I our milk decided to come to them in the evenings because Hanging out already big, can drink juice, korovkino milk and there are (further all dinner according to the list), and kittens still absolutely small and can do nothing. We drew together “animated cartoon“ (something like the comic book) about all this, read it before going to bed. Drank juice from a poilnik. Helped.
in a week I left for all day and when returned in the evening, milk stacked small a kotyatok. And the next morning it became clear that it met a little puppy and decided to leave to it in the afternoon... It is necessary to tell that all animals, despite early age, were extremely grateful and long told to Tusa thanks that she shared the milk with them, and in general such kind girl.the First weeks one and a half Tusk remembered
milk quite often, generally somewhere around the 12th day when there is already a wish to sleep, everything bothered, and somehow not so. In the evenings - no. She was delighted not that its milk suddenly left to someone to another, said that she does not want to share. Then milk said that today - that already promised, and tomorrow will come to Tusa - for the next day she just forgot about it.
Of course, the child became much better to eat, sleep all night long, almost without waking up. Last time I fed on August 31 - together with summer our GV ended. Tuske was two years old and five and a half months. Any regret I did not test, only simplification.I do not know
, it would be easier for me for these 29 months if I initially knew about how feeding will be long, and did not feed hopes for its end ahead of time. Perhaps it was necessary to think slightly more of equality in the relations of mother and child, in connection with GV, at least. Perhaps it was necessary simply to be lazy and not to give to use less himself as a baby`s dummy. Or perhaps all this was correct, on - fashionable. I do not know. Now, I hope, brains will return into place - till the birth of the following child there is still time to think...