British counted all myths about moths of
that the number of men who are ready to pay for sex in 10 years grew up almost twice. People began to treat more liberally love for money, they are not frightened even by threat of AIDS. In Russia this problem costs even more sharply, than in the West. And in many respects that is promoted by a huge number of the myths occurring around moths. One of the most widespread and dangerous:“ My family this “slippery“ subject will never concern“.
is Written about commercial sex much, but often the truth mixes up with lie. Especially when politicians get down to business: prostitutes that are held up to shame and suggest to send all for 101 - y kilometer, suddenly begin to rescue them, to protect and demand legalization them “socially - useful“ business. And meanwhile prostitution in Russia develops with great strides, conceding in profitability only to traffic in arms and drugs. According to the experts, if to the panel there were generally the girl`s visitors from Moldova and Ukraine earlier, then in the last 2 years the visitor the serious competition was made by Russians: almost every second prostitute working in Moscow has citizenship of the Russian Federation.
Myth the first.
only lonely men who have no family or the constant partnerhave Sex with prostitutes
It is incorrect. Only 43% of clients of prostitutes are not married, the others are married, official or civil (34%), or have the constant girlfriend (23%). Psychologists claim that these men are not derelicts of society, on the contrary, they are distinguished by the high stable level of prosperity. They so loyally treat prostitution that are ready to buy the prostitute to own son when to that time to become the man comes. The majority answered a question of what is not enough for them in sex with the wife, that are happy with everything, but they like sex with different partners.
Opinion of the client
Vadim, 49 years, is married, has the son and the grandson, the public figure:
“I sleep with prostitutes as long as I could remember. They give me feeling of novelty. On the work I go on regions much, everywhere extend me worm welcome - the best hotels, restaurants and young girls. I soberly estimate myself: I am not young, not too attractive any more to achieve such girls, I will need to pay them - restaurants, gifts, flowers, special attention. And not the fact that all this will lead to result necessary to me. With prostitutes, especially provincial, much more simply, they do not make you a claim and are not capricious: wanted nonconventional sex - please, wanted sex without condom - too not against, only pay. It, at least, is honest. They do not pretend that I am loved. I should not pretend to be too. Of course, such sex is impossible without alcohol. But it is necessary to relax somehow? With the wife of problems is not present - I always “walk“ in other city, she does not know or prefers to pretend that she does not guess anything. Eventually, I provided it very comfortable life. And then what to it to endure? I am not going to divorce her“.
is Commented by the psychologist Marta Belokon:“If the person began to earn with
very big money recently, then can push to the prostitute it as it surprisingly sounds, reasons of a certain prestige. Souteneurs who look for clients among nouveau riches, are interested in creating a certain fashion on “goods“. Dear prostitute is put in one row with expensive car, a country house etc. of People which has not too high cultural level and which besides has no or does not recognize in life of other values, except material, quite easily can give in on these tricks. Though the normal man, having even tried a two-three of times of paid love, as a rule, refuses it - feelings in sex are important not only for women. The wife, if she values the husband, has to as it is banal sounds, to divide his interests, to impart to him new, to increase his cultural level, at last. If its interests lie in the plane “women - vodka - soccer“, then it is necessary to try to pull out dear person from that environment where it is considered normal“.the Myth of the second
Sex with professionals is not dangerous by
- they always use condoms
the Lie. During scheduled maintenance among prostitutes which was carried out by the staff of AIDS - Infosvyaz fund it became known that girls have on average 295 sexual intercourses a year. From them nearly a third (88) contacts were not protected. On a question of doctors why they take such risk, answered so:
- upon the demand of the client, I hesitate to buy
- in a drugstore.
Only 18% of prostitutes apply means of protection with constant partners, the majority consider it as a bad form: refusing condoms, they as if let know that they trust the friend.
Opinion of the professional
Oksana, 35, the former professional prostitute, is married now, passed into category of “lovers“:“I began to work with
at restaurant, and the girlfriend acquainted me with my future husband - it worked as the waiter there. He knew, than I am engaged, but was not against our meetings - Dima got divorced recently from the second wife who changed it. After a while he made me the proposal. In my opinion, just it appeared in captivity of stereotypes: men have an opinion that from prostitutes the most faithful wives turn out. The question of fidelity was for it painful, I learned that he divorced the first wife for the same reason - it found other man. We began to live together, and I understood soon why his previous wives sought someone elsewhere. Dima was an egoist and was not accustomed to care for the wife at all. He never gave anything to me, did not carry anywhere under the pretext of what does not love the abroad and in general departures, saved on everything that concerned me, but at the same time behaved as if he is my benefactor. I got used that I always had money, dresses, and with it I got to the austerity mode. Therefore in a year after a wedding I got an old notebook with phones of the former clients and made the first call.
Of course, I never use condoms when I sleep with the husband. Recently I picked up from the client uroplazmoz, it was necessary to be treated most and to give tablets to the husband. From dismantling like “from where an infection“ I was rescued that it and not an angel. At the beginning of our joint life it infected me with clamidiosis. Whether I am afraid to catch AIDS? No, I sleep only with those to whom I trust. Among my clients there are only family men, they most of all are afraid for the reputation therefore they from a bed in a bed do not jump - I for them as a breath of fresh air. Case about which I told, the only puncture in a year“.
- according to various researches, in Moscow from 150 to 300 thousand prostitutes “work“. with
- In Russia infected HIV about 1% of adult population, it is about 1 million people. According to forecasts of doctors, by 2008 about 400 thousand HIV - infected and the patients with AIDS can die.
- Since 2000 incidence of syphilis began to decline. Venereologists explain it with the fact that the population, especially youth, began a thicket to use condoms.
- In Moscow 50 percent sex - workers do drugs, in St. Petersburg - 80%, and 80% of their clients supported that sex and alcohol are inseparable.
is Commented by the venereologist, the candidate of medical sciences Olga Loseva:
“These girls are in captivity of many prejudices. They so got used to put the life at risk (more than 70% from them are regularly exposed on the panel to violence, both sexual, and physical) that the venereal disease seems to them the smallest of the evils. If the client refuses sex in a condom, they will never risk insist, refuse contact they cannot too because money is already received by the souteneur on a point. They just have no choice. But you should not idealize girls and to see in them only the victims of circumstances too, our researches showed that in 50% of cases the infected girls continue to work. They explain it with the fact that they need money for life, for treatment not to get to servitude to the souteneur. The most dangerous that they apply the unprotected sex during periods when the probability of a transmission of infection from the partner to the partner increases several times. Very few people know that over the last 5 years among various ways of transfer of AIDS the sexual way came out on top. If earlier consumers of drugs and homosexuals, then now in a risk zone all who have sex without protection including the married women who never fooled around generally caught. Payment for levity of one of spouses happens awful for both partners. I had to face how the young woman during pregnancy passed inspection on HIV and, to the horror, learned that it is infected. Of course, on the first place on risk there are workers of commercial sex - it is as we speak, nuclear group, and further on decreasing there are clients, sexual partners and husbands of girls, further away - girlfriends and wives of clients and those men with whom girls had a sex. Generally, all of us in one boat and it is impossible to speak about complete security of people who directly have no sexual contacts with prostitutes. Not without reason 80 percent of clients whom we interrogated, admitted that had such serious venereal illness as syphilis and gonorrhea“.
the Myth the third
From the good wife to the prostitute the husband will not run. Means, the woman herself is guilty of what the spouse changes her
This myth men thought up, of course, to muffle sense of guilt and shame. Because, despite all liberalization of morals, nobody it is opened to brag, even in the men`s company that goes to prostitutes, will not become. Psychologists divide clients of moths into two groups: people impulsive, inclined to risk and aggression treat the first. To the second, on the contrary, shy, afraid of criticism from the woman to the man`s force. Prostitutes are necessary to both that and another, first of all, for the sake of self-affirmation. With them it is not necessary to build up the relationship, to incur some obligations etc. Paid - and use, such is philosophy of the typical client of the prostitute.
Opinion of the client necessarily
Nastya, a public relations - the manager, 30 years:
“A year ago I overslept with the prostitute. It was not the conscious decision, just like that it turned out, one may say, against my will. I had a difficult period in life - I got divorced from husband, rushed about, the ringleader unnecessary novels, generally, went down stream, up hill and down dale. As a result “came up“ to one old acquaintance - we had common causes. I knew that it am pleasant to it, it periodically did me absolutely certain hints, but I refused. And then, seeing my state, he suggested me to go with it to the South, several days I agreed to have a rest, change scenery - and. While we flew, settled on the place, everything was remarkable: he was attentive, presented me a huge bouquet of roses, at restaurant ordered what I love. After indifference of the ex-husband directly balm for the soul. And in the evening, having fairly become slightly tight, he told that it has not enough of me and still the woman is necessary. But, as “the real gentleman“, he is ready to give pleasure and me and to invite not the “ordinary“ prostitute, but the bisexual that she satisfied both of us. When I began to object, it made absolutely terrible eyes, it began to approach me with such person that I thought: it will hit me. I was frightened. The situation was still that - nearly a night, others city, I in the buff in a hotel room where my things are scattered. Generally, I agreed. He invited some girl as it appeared, here all know him, he is a regular customer. The girl was surprisingly modest and very young, she told that she is 17 years old. However, she looked my coeval. They began to somersault on a bed, then he forced it to make love to me. At that moment I thought only of one - that this night came to an end somewhat quicker, and there came morning when I am able to gather and leave home. My “gentleman“ soon calmed down, turned the girl out and zakhrapet. This adventure forever discouraged at me to casual communications, even with old acquaintances“.
is Commented by the psychologist Marta Belokon:by
“Why it is so developed sex - the industry? There is an elementary speculation on human wants. If the man with the wife has a difficult period (and so usually it happens when work begins to take away more and more time and forces), then disharmony in the personal relations, offenses from the spouse can result in disharmony in sex. And the thesis that the sexual relations are very important for men does not demand special proofs.Tendency to debauchery is characteristic
of a certain type of people - they most often have no internal core: it either is destroyed, or was bent. To spend money which is earned at the expense of the burned nervous cages or big risk for the prostitute - all the same what to prosazhivat them in a casino - the person prefers not to ask itself a question: why it does it. By and large, it is just thrown out money. As a rule, prostitution pulls for itself all other defects - alcoholism, drug addiction. With prostitutes it is possible to drink how many you want, it is convenient, it will not be as the wife to do you remarks or to care for yours health. Happens that people address to the psychologist with a persistent request to remove some dependence - from alcohol, game, drugs, insuperable thirst for chaotic sexual communications, that is to be coded. But it is not an exit, the problem is much deeper - the person or is inclined to self-damage, or just lost the purpose in life, from here this abnormal draft“.
the Myth the fourth
From prostitutes turn out the best wives
Unfortunately, it is a lie too Though not only men, but also girls trust in this myth. However the social workers conducting for years prevention among sex - workers, know many personal tragedies when the girl wanted to come off the panel and could not. And matter is not that prostitution corrupts, and women sit down on reusable sex, as on drug. In the majority prostitutes, on the contrary, are asexual. For them it is simply routine, not prestigious, often dangerous work. And they from - for money which never happens enough come back to the panel, they sit down on fast, easily available money. Besides there are also psychological problems, girls, as well as their clients, are not able to build up long-term partnership. Many have problems with alcohol and drugs. Generally, the wife from the former prostitutes is a huge ball of problems.
Opinion of the man
“I will never go to the prostitute. There are no emotions, there are no feelings, there is no hunter`s an instinct - as though you just came to shop, chose goods, paid. Not the fact that you will buy what will be pleasant to you, - Oleg, 26 - the summer businessman says. - I have acquaintances, they are busy so that they have no time to look after when they need the woman - they buy her. However, some complained that when the paid time expires, the partner can just rise and leave, to her it is unimportant in what state the client if he underpaid. For money you get used to love, and gradually there is an impression that selling love - it is normal, you and the wife can buy yourself.
about eight Years ago when I was an ordinary programmer, I did the website for one institution. It was expensive brothel: photos of dear call girls were posted online. I communicated with these girls, did them a portfolio. Especially I was struck by one of them: Oksana - coming from Ohmsska, graduated there from three higher education institutions, knowing several foreign languages. I did not keep, asked why in it with such “background“ to be engaged in so unseemly craft. The answer was simple: I will not earn so much any more anywhere. And soon at restaurant I saw that Oksana drank vodka just as water. This business spares nobody“.
is Commented by the psychologist Marta Belokon:“Men usually hide
from the wives that they use services of prostitutes, but sometimes, for example, if the man caught and infected the wife, secret becomes obvious. And unfortunate women suffer then from doubts whether the husband continues to visit haunts of vice, whether it is possible to trust it. Try to inform of an obvious thing the husband: if the person addresses the souteneur even once, he is included in the criminal list: now from it it is possible to extend money, as required to use blackmail. The man can blab out inadvertently to that woman with whom he had a good sex, about some trade secrets. At last, very few people are interested that they with prostitutes learned about its adventures in business. Though from the practical point of view the prostitute is “safer“ for wives, than the mistress: for the sake of prostitutes almost never leave wives. Sex - the industry - extremely favorable business: at the minimum expenses it is possible to get the maximum profit. In general the relations “the client - the prostitute“ remind the relations “the owner - the slave“. If the man “sits down“ on the prostitute, becomes her regular customer, here without the assistance of the sexopathologist not to manage. I had a client - the married man of 51 years. He “tried“ the prostitute, she was pleasant to him, it began to go to her: at first one-time, then even more often. Reached that it began the real withdrawal pains if it did not meet it two weeks. It is necessary to tell that it is favorable to such women “to form constant base“, for this purpose they use various receptions, for example, at the time of an orgasm press certain points on a body. In neurolinguistic psychology (NLP) it is called “an anchor method“, as a result, having sex with other woman, this person begins to feel that it not that there it was better, more habitual, more comfortable. It is clear, that to force the husband to go to the psychotherapist it is impossible. It is possible to resort to cunning: tell that the help is necessary to you, and from it support is required“.
the Myth the fifth
Prostitution - purely man`s problem. Women never pay for sex
on the website Newscom Recently. ru appeared the unusual message: the authorities of Turkey are anxious with flow to the country of lonely Russian women. For many of them it is not just tourism, and sex - tourism. But women consider that it is romantic tourism: palm trees, sea and passionate, gentle lover nearby. Happens that it is necessary to pay for love and romanticism, in the same Turkey the animator, the massage therapist or the waiter will take for the additional, not provided by the hotel price list services from the client $100-150 in a week. In the countries is poorer, for example, in Cuba or in Dominican republic the cute young man with pleasure will become the faithful servant and the page of the wealthy tourist only for one opportunity to live at her expense.
Having interrogated 240 women having a rest in Negrile and in two similar resorts in Dominican Republic sociologists from Britain obtained data which contrary to expectations confirm existence of “pink“ sexual tourism: about a third of the interrogated women told that they during vacation had physical proximity with local young people. 60% allowed existence of “an element of economic interest“ in these intimate relations.
Opinion of visitors of a forum of Maria Arbatova where the subject female sex - tourismby
“For the Turk you - his first and last love these three days was discussed (even if already tomorrow he will forget about it). As they do it, it is unclear, quite possible that trust in it. Flowers, oaths on a lap under the moon, the night clubs taking trips over the sea, verses only in your honor, a hookah and... well and sex, of course“.“At my friend the husband significantly repeated
:“ The man will always attach the member“. At the same time it had a started prostatitis and there was practically no inclination. And at the girlfriend - read off scale. You will go here both to look for Turks, and the yeti“.
Comment of the manager of travel agency Olga Vasina:
“I consider that rumors about man`s prostitution in the western resorts are strongly exaggerated. Naturally, among local men there are enough persons interested to oversleep with the Russian tourists. Our women around the world are famous for the beauty. For the local man it is a great fortune, hardly he will begin to ask even for sex from the lady payment. Owners of hotels look at such informal relations with tourists rather strictly. If the hotel expensive also belongs to a solid western network, then the gigolo can take off from work. Hotels make light of such tricks more simply. The owner of one hotel in Hurghada even exempted the waiter from the main work when to it there came a constant mistress from Russia“.