What do we feel when we are born?
This question began to concern mankind long ago. According to psychologists, by means of different receptions, for example hypnosis or respiratory equipment, it is possible to break through to memoirs which remain with us after the birth. Let`s try to present (or to remember) what happened to us at the time of birth.
Knows that yet not been born kid is capable to feel, feel, see and hear. Moreover, the psychologists studying pre-natal development of children proved that in memory of the child there is all that he endured from the moment of conception. Impressions of the events are partially kept in a brain, partially - in a peculiar memory of a body. Proceeding from it, it is possible to tell surely that such bright event as the birth, has to leave a mark in our consciousness. But if everything occurs quite so, then why we do not remember the moment of the birth? Most likely, we remember it, but unconsciously and therefore we not always associate it with the muffled images and unclear experiences which are to us.
Of course, memories of this event at everyone the. And still in them is much in common. If you want to approach a little those feelings which were felt at the time of the birth, then it is possible now, from height of adult understanding of life and by means of the developed imagination, to try to present what happened to you then, in those far times.
So... You live in fantastically convenient place, the feeling of discomfort - always heat, conveniently, nourishingly and quietly is not familiar to you at all. You are happy with everything, you have everything that is required, all your requirements are satisfied by itself, hardly managing to arise. At the same time you should not use any efforts in order that everything was quite so around. And you, of course, do not even suspect, are how happy because you in a different way never and lived.
But suddenly everything begins to change promptly around. At first to you it becomes rather small and dushnovato, then it is a little hungry... You are puzzled because did not want anything to change also the main thing at all, did nothing that though something changed. However, despite it, your habitual world for some reason began to fall. To cope with a situation, you go to long and difficult travel, even without representing, than it can end and whether there will be you live of this scrape.
Having endured all burdens, deprivations and dangers of this dangerous way, you from the cozy, comfortable, perfect world get to the world unknown, cold and empty where everything is necessary, all to do most and at the same time still to suffer from hunger and belly-aches! Agree that such impressions can be compared to the real vital crash easily. For this reason psychologists call the fact of birth “a birth trauma“.
Change of day and night
Getting to the new world, the newborn does not know yet that it is adapted for life in it. And before being convinced of what can breathe independently at least he tests deadly horror. Not fear, namely horror which endures any living being when there is a threat of his life. Whether it means that the first shout of the baby is a shout of horror? Yes, in the same way as the second and third. But whether the child has an understanding of this horror? Most likely, no. The kid tests the horror which is not postponed in consciousness. For this reason he cannot remember this feeling subsequently.
By the way, unlike adults kids endure vital events in a different way. For example, when the adult is in the heat of passion, at it nevertheless the part of consciousness capable to critically estimate the events remains and according to it to regulate behavior (loss of this ability speaks about emergence in the person of psychiatric pathology). The newborn has no ability to understanding as it was not created yet. Therefore everything that occurs around it, he worries all the being - both a body, and soul, but does not realize at the same time either time, or a scene of action. Everything endured remains in subconscious memory and has no relation to conscious emotions. Then in consciousness there can be pieces of various emotions, but all of them make only an iceberg top.
Life of the newborn proceeds in three states:
- the Content occurring when to the kid is nourishing, warm and comfortable. Usually in this state he sleeps or dozes. About one and a half months, that is until emergence of the first smile which means that the child realized who his savior, the kid does not test special pleasure at the time of awakening.
- Discomfort which directs horror at the baby. The child cannot independently facilitate to himself life and endures a condition of hunger and cold as fatal inevitability. Of course, the simplification most often comes, but it is always unknown from where and always by itself - the kid cannot allocate long time from world around of the one who brings it disposal, and every time perceives it as long-awaited, but unexpected. For the adult expression “by miracle most precisely characterizes this state escaped“.
- The third state comes at the time of contact of the kid with mother as with a certain manifestation of the outside world. In spite of the fact that the child does not understand yet what occurs, this interaction is original as in it there are participants, a meeting and interpenetration of two worlds. Of course, at first all meetings are painted by fear, but then when the kid “communicates“ with mother, to it the understanding begins to come that it is not lonely in this world. By the way, this feeling brings it disposal of the tested horror.
Strangely enough, they arise not only at the child, but also at mother, and usually do not depend on her adult solvency. At the same time a condition of the baby and mother cardinally differ from each other as everyone experiences the difficulties. Let`s try to deal both with those and with others.we Will begin
with the fact that the kid does not guess existence of such real being yet as mother, and about her role in his life. For it there is only a discomfort and someone, relieving it of this discomfort. Mother perfectly knows who is she and who for her this child, she prepared that he will be born waited for a meeting with it. Besides, she owns not only concept of the present, but also past, and future, and knows that even if the kid will cry a couple of minutes, nothing terrible happens, he will not die neither of hunger, nor of cold. Especially as he will begin to see and recognize her soon, and the world around will stop being it frightening and dangerous. Still mother understands that sometime the child will grow up and will be capable to take care not only of himself, but also of others. Thus, the woman sees prospect and is usually glad to appearance of the kid therefore its emotional state is much more positive.
When the child and mother meet and begin to interact, they as any two persons, influence at each other and transfer at each other the experiences. And, if the kid does not aspire to it as he understands nothing yet, mother tries to adapt to the child psychologically. And it is fraught that the woman, especially sensitive and emotional, most likely, will feel horror which is tested by the kid, and “will catch“ him. As it was already told, memory of this time, let subconscious, remains at each of us. Mother risks to meet not only experiences of the child, but also with own, recovered and emerged from subconsciousness depths. As a result to her it will become bad, terrible, and she will hardly be able qualitatively to care for the kid.
Actually, to the adult it is very difficult to meet the horror of the birth endured once. In - the first, it real, that is reflects the real situation: threat of life of the newborn exists, the kid is still so small and vulnerable that cannot live (and to survive) independently. In - the second, this horror comprehensive, it covers all your being, is endured by each section of a body. And not only because mentions life support bases - during that time when the horror was postponed in memory, you were only born and in a different way were not able to worry. Especially, at that moment nobody promised you any exit, and the birth did not bear disposal, and opposite, meant the separate existence connected with discomfort and various difficulties.
What can help mother? In - the first, understanding of what happens to it and from where these feelings undertook. If the woman of it does not understand, she can be frightened of the experiences. In - the second, mother can try to recover, that is to rehabilitate the adult, maternal part of consciousness which just knows what occurs sees prospect and rejoices to the fact that it has these difficulties (the care of the kid means).to
It is interesting that memories of that time periodically visit not only young parents, but also many others, not puzzled so far with this problem, people. Usually it occurs during the crisis periods of life which can be connected with death or loss of the loved one, especially if he was for you support and a support. Very often these memoirs emerge during crises of a growing when there is an inevitable understanding of those changes which you are not able to cancel. However they can arise and when you consciously change the life, especially if it is not just natural stages of your life, such as marriage (marriage) or appearance at work, and cardinal change of the direction of a course of life.
Very often the experiences which remained from the birth come to us in the form of dreams. Of course, none of modern psychologists and even psychoanalysts will undertake to treat your dreams, but nevertheless it is possible to pay some attention to them. Different people dream the most different images, but the essence always remains same: the person moves from one world to another on a difficult and narrow way, and it is connected with very strong and not always clear feelings. Sometimes dreams - accidents where you remain on the place are, and the world around you sharply changes.
you can meet the experiences which remained in memory since the birth and in reality, by the way, usually it is much more unpleasant. In a soft form it is familiarly much of us. You never felt awkwardness, because that the train stopped in a tunnel? Or when you had to remain for a while in the got stuck elevator? And maybe, you do not like to leave the narrow alley on open space of the area or the wood - in the field... It is known that many people (it is much more, than it is accepted to think) experience in similar situations not just unpleasant experiences, but peculiar attacks of panic with heartbeat, shortage of air, nausea and dizziness. Emergence of such feelings can be explained with the fact that all described situations in some measure reproduce experience of our birth. So, the movement on the narrow closed space, jamming and impossibility to be released conditionally means the movement on patrimonial ways, and the exit to suddenly extending space is similar to the birth. whether
Affects future emotional human life what he tested at the time of delivery? The data saying that the origin of any mental diseases or borderlines is connected with the birth no. However in moments of life, heavy for mentality, in a brain those heavy experiences which once you already happened to experience can come to life (for example, at the time of the birth). It is known that the person - a being rather “economic“ therefore why to him to invent new if similar and suitable already is in experience even if unconscious?
the Psychological trauma of the birth becomes for all of us the first reality of life and hardly requires special attention or correction. If the newborn managed to pass through childbirth and to survive, so he rather strong to pass tests which will be brought to it by life as a payment that he lives. The same as physiologically healthy (“ripened“) child can be born without harm for health, so he is able to endure and psychologically this trauma without any harm for sincere health. Inconvenience, troubles and discomfort (both physiological, and psychological) are not so dangerous as they seem as make a part of the life and are normal vital difficulties which the been born kid has to overcome.
B than the main complexity of perception of “a birth trauma“ consists? Partly that it seems to us strange that it the event, traditionally happy for all, as the birth, is connected with experiences of fear and horror... But probably the great sacrament and a miracle of the birth which, probably, will never cease to shake mankind consists in it too.
By the way what we neither knew and nor was explained to themselves and others, but on shock force the birth and death stand nearby. Eternal riddle of the universe: from where the new person, the new world, the whole planet, never earlier not existing undertakes? And where all this leaves? Probably, not to find the answer. But make one rather interesting conclusion in attention: the birth and death are equally significant both for the person, and for the world to which it comes, in which lives and which leaves then. Life comes to an end with parting and begins with it. Only in the first case it is necessary to say goodbye to a frail world, and in the second - to a maternal womb...