For as how we punish the children? Personally I will never forget
day when I for the first time did not restrain and shlepnulapo to buttocks I wash still very little, but already very stubborn daughter. To Takplokho it was also a shame to me never before in life. And here I, perhaps, for the first time thought of whether really I understand what is created to a vety small head. And still I understood that I proceeded not from a sobstvennopostupk of the baby, and from the irritation, fatigue and god still of znayetchy.
is frequent we just “we break“: we raise the voice, we are irritated, we punish the child, but, most often, we cannot even on mgnoveniyeostanovitsya, think, try to understand - not ourselves, and this the little, but quite deserving respect personality. Except the shabby nerves, seldom what we try to obtain a myprakticheska: punishment - not most effektivnyysposob education. So, for example, also the author of the article “Aggression Iagressivnost“ considers.Many psikhologiutverzhdat
that we inadequately express the relation and, thus, we form “protest behavior“ at the child. The psychologist M. Boguslavskiyschitayet, that the samyyzhestoky type of punishment is a humiliation or fear. Such to sposobdobitsya obedience it is considered among psychologists a blow below the belt. Pochti80 the % of mental injuries which psychologists should “investigate“ uvzrosly neurotics originate in the far childhood when rebenkapsikhologichesk cruelly punished.experience Nikitinykh described in the book “Reserves of Zdorovyanashy Children“ is Very interesting to
. They too schitayutprobly punishments of children of one of the most difficult, and to them, also as imnogy of us it was necessary to overcome many stereotypes in communication by own children. And again, also you are again convinced that more often the vsegoprichina of the conflict is covered in “own not skill, tactlessness, crudity, short-sightedness“.
the Author of the book “How Really to Love the Child“, R. Campbell, considers too that sometimes we incorrectly treat “bad“ behavior of our children. In practice it turns out that our kids otchayannoinut our love, sometimes in very irrational ways owing to a svoyeynezrelost.
If you supporter of strict education of children, perhaps, to you budetinteresna article “How to Punish the Child“. Only not zabyvaytespustya some time after the child was punished to obyazatelnodat to it to feel that it still we love also roads for you. To destroy the threads connecting us with our children so easily, to avosstanavlivat trust to us, the adult, it is necessary for many years.
How nevertheless not to bring the matter to family “storms“, both to adekvatnosoriyentirovatsya in a situation and to choose punishment if business to etogodoshlo, read in Haim Dzh`s book. Dzhaynota “Parents and children“. The author rassmatrivayetkonkretny situations with which we, parents, come up daily, ivykhoda from them.
A here the magazine “Female health“ considers, chtonedopustimo to punish children physically, it is even simple to splash. Otveshivayapodzatylniki, you admit own inability spravitsyas situations in other ways. About the power, the authority of parents, restriction read to loss of this power on the website “World of Psychology“.
On the Internet, everyone will find for itself(himself) answers to questions. On me, personally, great impression was made by the sermon of the metropolitan of the Kiev igalitsky Vladimir canonized, on punishment of children vpravoslavny families, published, unfortunately, in a short form. In the sermon it is said that badly only the fact that it is sinful before God therefore to punish sleduyettolko for what makes a sin before God. Perhaps, it also is tayedinstvenno the right wisdom which came to us from centuries, which and dolzhnabyt our beacon?
you can Discuss all these questions at a forum of the deacon Andrey Kurayev, a napravoslavny forum for parents, and also at conferences of a samogosemeyny portal “7ya. ru“.
With all the heart I wish you to love and understand myself and the children!