When parents at work...
our era are a century of huge speeds, and it demands from us the same fast movements. Hardly we manage to wake up as it is necessary to run for work, only we come back home - inevitably drives at a dream. The most part of life leaves at best on realization of the ideas, in the worst - on providing the family with elementary means for accommodation. There is no time left for communication with close people often. And it is good still if it is about adult independent people. Is much more sad that there are left without parental attention children, mothers and fathers constantly at work. May we bring up normally children on the job? >
everything Begins i with banal need to provide the child with all what it needs. And it needs qualitative products (it especially actually in ecologically dirty Moscow), toys, clothes which should be updated regularly because the kid grows... And clothes, toys and other things have to be not worse, than at other children in kindergarten or school. Not to do without the developing grants and textbooks, not to mention paid doctors, psychologists, sections and circles, hobbies of the child who can be very expensive. Everything listed forces us to be late at work much more than eight hours put by the labor legislation.
A except work we have also a requirement to take care of the own life, the hobbies and “toys“ that too takes away many hours. As a result of time for occupations by own children remains... it is slightly more, than at all. According to data of researches (in any case such information “walks“ on the Internet) on average the Moscow parent spends for communication with the child 23 minutes a day! It is a lot of or a little if to consider that for the little man parents are people on whom the Universe becomes isolated?
What is lost by the child?
Remember the childhood. What you dreamed of, having come from school or staying at home in the long winter evenings? Probably, that here - the call here will be distributed and mother or the father will be, the smell of a frost and freshness will break into the house, the beloved parent will smile, and you will rush to it towards... Of course, you hoped also that will bring to you that? that tasty or interesting, but the main thing - you will not be alone any more.
there passed a lot of time Since then, values of young generation rather changed, but the desire of human heat, presence by a number of a kindred spirit remained and remains dream of each person, especially the child. And regularly repeating situation when the son or the daughter goes to bed before your arrival from work, leads to emergence of a problem of loneliness (with all that it implies) in the early childhood.
Alternative occupations - games, the computer, circles and even books - do not replace real-life communication which is necessary for skills of behavior in society. If to address fauna, and also to remember mankind history at early stages of development of a civilization, we will see that kids spend all the time among adults. Thanks to such unity by the time of the beginning of adulthood the child has all knowledge and abilities necessary to live in society similar. Being aloof, the little man risks to grow up deprived of these skills, asocial, not contact.Would like to indicate
one very important detail. It is no secret that in the childhood character is built up. Partly the genetic factor, partly - an environment operates it. And the you spend less time near the child, the risk that the child will grow unlike by you is more. And who would not wish to see the son or the daughter similar to himself - kind, clever, sympathetic, strong, capable to become a reliable support to parents in old age and to give to them a reason to be proud of itself?Possible result the Child does not leave to
the problems unresolved too. To a certain age he begins to look for all that lacks it the house - attention and examples for imitation. How you think where it finds all this? Correctly - on the street where there are same children deprived of attention to live life and establish the laws. It is good or badly such school - solve, many of us passed it in due time. But it is necessary to consider several nuances.
the Street in the opinion of the child - the world of adults, that is senior teenagers. Authorities of the yard, and become at the same time objects for imitation of beginners and their authorities, and anyone can appear them: from heroes of new movies to modern political leaders. Arrangement of priorities happens on the street, as a rule, from force position as quite so and any society at early stages is formed. The law “who is stronger, that also is right“ forces the child to learn to submit to strong and to suppress weak.
Certainly, the system of values of the yard is formed generally proceeding from the same principle. Humanity, kindness, respect for the personality (but not to force), and also love to fine are displaced on the latest places. Each child seeks to become adult, and not just adult, and same as those who surround him. He will begin to smoke if in its environment the senior teenagers smoke, will try alcohol and drugs if these “entertainments“ in honor at the company.to
I at last, leaving the child on education of the street, you risk to sink quickly the authority in his estimation - it will be succeeded by other authorities, and to serve two gods, know, it is impossible. May be that, having missed several months, you should restore the arisen tears within several years.
What to do?
can Solve a similar problem, only paying to the child enough attention or at least providing the regular presence near it. But how to be if we do not have enough time for this purpose? Everyone who realizes importance of a problem tries to find the way out. Let`s consider possible options of the solution of this task.
Can shift part of cares of the children to own parents, that is to grandmothers and grandfathers. It is good if you have with them fine relations if they already also have for pensions time and desire constantly to be engaged in grandsons and granddaughters. But if what? that from the listed conditions is impracticable?
Then we address nurses, nurses and governesses (of course if our earnings it allow). But in the choice of the person to which you intend to entrust the child it is necessary to be extremely captious. In? the first, it has to be the kind, honest and happy person who will not cause to you and to the child of the evil, will not break on it the negative emotions. And in? the second, it is necessary to find if not the professional teacher then the person having a wide experience of the communication with children which is comprehensively developed to notice talents of your child and to give an impetus to their development. Besides, the nurse or the governess is obliged to impart to the child respect for parents, that is for you, and also to teach him to elementary rules of conduct, politeness, to tell about the secret code of honor adopted in our society.
If you consider that foreign person whatever it was will not give to the child of the fact that only you can enclose in it, then it is necessary to cut down the operating schedule.
Think of what forces you to spend at work much time: the desire to earn and realize is more than itself or will of the chief? If the first, then for the sake of own child you could stop for a while on some acceptable minimum to come home for an hour - another earlier. If the extended schedule - production need or a condition of acceptance you for work, try or to cope with the duties quicker, or to convince the chief a little to shorten your working hours even if with some decrease of a salary. For many such statement will seem absurd and unacceptable, but think of what you will lose, having kept superfluous hundred - two hundred dollars. In general, so far as concerns own children, pertinently to tell also about such victims as change of the employer with that which will allow you to leave work in five - six o`clock in the evening as it and is accepted in the majority of public institutions. In a question of change of work it is necessary to be guided also by criterion of proximity of office from the house, most of Muscovites spend for the road to work and back a lot of time.
one more interesting option unfortunately accepted not for all Exists. It is that one of parents hires the child after school lessons to himself. In it there is the charm - the kid since small years gets to adult collective in which not only studies communication with people, but also comprehends elements of production or business.
Needless to say that holiday and the most part of days off need to be carried out entirely with children. As if from time to time you wanted to have a rest from everything at once, not less and even yours are more necessary for your children care, attention and love.