It is recommended at stings of
our kid bites?! Usually for parents it is a bolt from the blue. And it not from pleasant. While bitten and bitten equally selflessly roar, you are forced to take emergency measures: to console one, in brief to explain the principles of philanthrophy to another and to apologize to parents of “victim“. Why many kids show discontent and anger by means of teeth? And how to teach small to declare a kusaka the feelings in the way which is socially accepted, not leaving marks of teeth?Anton someone bit
? It is difficult to believe in it. In one and a half years at it absolutely normal relations with other children. To bite! It absolutely is not similar to it. Anton was sent recently to a day nursery, and as soon as the door is closed behind his mother, all who are nearby should escape. Anton bites! It in rage! To it it is absolutely unclear why he has to spend day far from the house moreover and share the teacher (the mother`s assistant) with other children. Of course, such behavior creates difficulties for people around, but it happens to kids more often than can seem to us. Such reaction not the rarity for the child aged from one and a half till two years who was sent to a day nursery or was charged to the nurse. Of course, he gradually adapts to new circumstances, finds a common language with children and adults, but can sometimes express the love or rage literally, trying to appropriate or even “to absorb“ other person. For the kid it is a normal way of expression of aggression and love. Remember when the baby is hungry, he as if eats mother and if she insufficiently quickly responded to his appeal, he can bite a breast. Babies from the first days of life are able to suck and bite, a mouth for them - the major body necessary and for absorption of food, and for acquaintance to surrounding objects, and for expression of feelings. When the child is upset or angered, he can react in the way, habitual for himself, having simply bitten the offender. Social norms and rules are still not too important for kids, to it still not easy to control the rushes, he acts impulsively.
the Objective reasons
How to react to the fact that the kid bites? To limit his communication with other children? To be glad its abilities to stand for itself? Or to bite it in reply that he understood that it hurts? Precisely you should not resort to similar means. The child can begin to bite for the most different reasons. Anton fell into despair because that mother left it in a day nursery. Alyosha “showed teeth“ to Mischa when that pulled out at him from hands the machine, having interrupted fascinating game. Ania bites mother when that speaks by phone. When needs of the child for some reasons are ignored, he “votes against“ by means of teeth. The child reconciles not at once with the fact that parents and other people exist not only to submit to his desires and that their desires can be contrary to its own. You should not abuse and punish a small aggressor, namely such is usually first rush. Tell: “You become angry, you have on it reasons, but it is impossible to bite“. It is important to recognize the right of the child to experience negative emotions even if they concern you, and then to show that there are another, socially acceptable ways of their expression.
That your arguments sounded convincingly, use simple words and bright comparisons: “You are a person, and wolves and crocodiles bite. You not a crocodile?“ Vanya can become angry about the companion on games when that does not get down from a swing in any way. He can even shout that now its turn. And Lisa can envy the girlfriend who left to the yard with a new carriage for a doll. But to bite? No way! People so do not do, only animals. Explain it to the kid “without delay“, and then fix passed in a quiet situation. Think up several short stories about a wolf or some other toothy offender. Sew from a mitten a toy - a kusaka which the kid will be able to put on the handle and to show how the kusaka becomes angry. Playing with parents, the child will learn to operate the emotions. The good experience for the kid helping it to accept own “bad“ feelings, but not to perceive them as alien and destructive. Through game situations it is possible to show to the child conflict situations, typical for his life, and how game characters cope with them. That is to give it role models, at this age children gain behavioural skills, imitating our actions. The small child often has no alternative way of expression of anger, it is necessary to teach him to advocate the interests by means of words and the corresponding tone: “Is not present! I do not agree!“ Show it as it can support the words by means of language of a mimicry and gestures: to frown eyebrows, to stamp a leg. Most often the kid manages to acquire such, safe for people around, a way of expression of anger. At first it is necessary that adults were near and helped children with resolution of conflicts, reminded that to do and speak in a situation, difficult for them, encouraged and protected. Maturing, children will be able not only to stand for themselves, but also to protect younger. And the more children communicate, the their repertoire of expression of the feelings becomes richer.
your child quite often comes from day nursery or kindergarten with traces from stings. What to do that it stopped?
- Warn tutors if they it is not aware yet. To calm aggressive-minded children and to protect from them the others - their direct duty.
- Talk to the offender`s parents, without resorting to the conflict and without accusing either them, or the child. Together try to understand what occurs and to find the reasons of such behavior. The main thing that parents have to put and begin to solve this problem in one way or another.
- Teach the child to assert the rights. If he feels danger, he can shout, stamp indignantly a leg, generally, to show that he is angered too and will not give himself in offense. Having learned to express clearly the feelings, the child and in other situations will feel confident and that is not less important, will be able to be respectful to feelings of people around.
If the child bites himself
It is not an exceptional case, and such behavior can have several reasons. Some kids, having made offense for which they are usually abused, defiantly bite themselves, showing to parents that those can already not worry concerning punishment. As a rule, parents are anxious from - for the fact that the child hurt himself, and persuade him not to do more so, offense remains unaddressed. It is worth meaning that such behavior of yours of the baby can be not only small cunning, but also way to show to parents that it rather big to be responsible for the acts and to admit guilt. The kid can bite himself if he strongly is angry, but cannot or is not able to express anger. In this case it is necessary to explain that he has the right to be angry with others and to show the feelings to offenders. It does not need to punish itself for the anger, to test it absolutely normally.