Recently mother transferred by BACK IN USSR
to me the tetradaughter with accurately removed inscription “Education“ on a cover. When I was a little girl, mother subscribed to Rabotnitsa and Krestyanka magazines. It cut out the most interesting articles from these magazines and pasted them in a notebook. There were notebooks on cookery, sewing, housekeeping and, of course, education of children. Thus, I had an opportunity to plunge anew into the atmosphere of my childhood and to look at it a little bit on the other hand.
the Majority of articles was how to minimize influence of the child on life of adults. Articles of type: “Whims at children“, “Little despots“, “He understands nothing...“ obviously dominated over all others. I cannot keep not to quote.“I want“
and it “is impossible“. How to cultivate desires of the child
“Well whether it is worth worrying also about education of children`s desires? The child and has so enough of them - only manage to satisfy, - other reader will tell. In that is that and trouble that many children have excessively many desires and there is no ability to constrain itself. Education of culture of desires also assumes care of teaching the child to coordinate the desires with desires of others.
Education of desires - difficult and laborious business. It is enough to make a small slip, and the first harbingers of trouble already appear: at the child such requirements with which it is necessary to struggle long, persistently arise. Look at the newborn. The baby understands nothing yet, did not learn even to look, listen, be enough with hands, but already well feels pleasant and unpleasant, unconsciously reaches for what gives him pleasure. Will visit several times hands at the adult - and does not want to lie in a bed any more, it is rolled up from crying when it begins to be stacked, demands that its all the time was carried on hands. If feed the kid from a pacifier, after that he does not like to suck a hard maternal breast any more. Also easily there are also other harmful desires and habits: to suck fingers, to finger mother`s hair or eyebrows, to tear books and magazines, to fill up at a motion sickness etc.
the Active resistance to the wrong aspirations of the child, consecutive “no“ - here one of important means of fight against egoistical desires of the child. > “It is good to p to tell
to you “no“, parents will tell. - And what to the small child from these bans? He will loudly cry“.
At the beginning the kid, having heard exacting it “is impossible“, and will cry really. It is a pity for him, of course. But there is nothing terrible, let it be time - another will cry. If bans of adults are consecutive, children`s tears will quickly dry, and then there will come the moment when the child quietly repeats after the adult: “It is impossible! It is impossible!“ ...
Here at such level. Separately from everything. From biology, ethology, common sense. It is not known senior research associate from where bad habit appears to suck fingers. What to do to the poor child when the breast was selected on a whistle exactly in a year, and a pacifier even earlier - “spoils a bite“? The Sosatelny reflex, as a rule, does not die away to two - three-year age, and in certain cases longer.Hair the kid fingers
because genetic memory so prompts it it. The little monkey holds a mother`s hair and feels safe. My one-and-a-half-year-old son still half asleep touches me for hair, and only after that quietly continues to sleep farther. It is unlikely he would understand me if I heart-rendingly began to cry out “it is impossible!“ in the middle of the night.
A to be at mother on hands - not a whim, but a necessary condition of normal emotional development of the baby. Only closer by a year the kid begins to realize himself a separate being and to defend the autonomy, to same mother and the child make simbiotichny couple. Often kids of 8 - 9 months begin to bite a maternal breast, and it does not speak about dissoluteness of the child at all. Just the child needs to check what reaction mother will have on the action caused to them, he experimentally comes that mother - the individual. To give a flick to the baby, or to splash on a bottom in revenge that “to liquidate harmful requirements and desires“ to put it mildly, uneducationally. As well as to suffer, hiding pain as these can disorient the kid. The best is to discharge for the period of the kid of a breast, having emotionally explained to the kid that it is painful to mother.
About feeding on hours was already told and written much therefore I will just provide one quote: “The first two - three months of the kid feed with
in 3 - 3,5 hours, doing a break at night. If this rule to observe strictly, the child is good, with appetite is. But sometimes mother herself breaks an order: with pleasure the child sleeps, there is no wish to awake him. Time of feeding moves, the order is broken. And then mother is surprised: the kid begins to be capricious, eats worse. Mother with feeding will be late - the following needs to be begun in time put behind that!“ - N. Ivannikova, candidate of medical sciences. whether
to such significant amount of bottle-fed babies. Only the children`s small bottle with mix, and not the real female breast can adapt to the similar mode. By the way, the explanation why it is impossible to feed at night very amused: whether
“To feed with night of the kid? No and no! The stomach of the child is not capacious and excretes digestive juice a little - let`s it have a rest! Do not break already developed feeding rhythm. Prepare every evening the fresh, cooled boiled water. If the kid begins to rustle and worry at night, give him water from a spoon. It is desirable that it was done by the father or still somebody from house, but only not mother. The kid on a smell of breast milk knows the constant wet nurse already well and at her presence insists on more exactingly night feeding“ - S. Polchanova, the doctor.
would be is logical to be assumed that if the ventricle is not capacious, therefore, has to receive food in the small portions and is more often. And that turns out, so small time and “underdeveloped“, in general have a rest. There is nothing and worry. And if joking apart, then the kid crying with hunger it is a pity. The nature specially allocated this baby with a keen sense of smell and a search reflex that it on a smell of milk found a mother`s breast, and a loud voice that if something happens this milk to demand.to
In general to understand these simple things does not need vocational education, only the maternal intuition suffices. All instinctive programs are written down at us on brain “hard drive“. A problem that the belief in the printing word was so strong what maternal intuition not always maintained the competition in fight against authorities. And history shows that some mothers, really, stood with hours over shouting for hunger, babies and left away the room that the kid could “train the lungs“.
As for pedagogical education, at that time it was successfully replaced by education ideological. The ideology was present everywhere: in psychology, physiology, medicine, and in science of education and related subjects she took the central place. Finally, all above described recommendations were consolidated to that in the final society received the responsible, patient, executive citizen without excessive inquiries, “excessive desires“, got used to live on the mode, especially without thinking of sense of life.
the Child since the birth had to fit into system, and parents at the initial stage had to enter it into this system. In a year the kid went to kindergarten with ideologically sustained bias. And mother came to work as she is, first of all, the valuable worker, and mother in the third, after trade-union, turn. Further the baton was adopted by school, a pioneer team, the Komsomol organization. Then it was possible to go to build BAM or on the Virgin soil.
Fortunately, person being difficult and many-sided. It does not keep within such primitive scheme and irrespective of the fact which in the country the political system or religious faith, tries to live under the internal, natural laws. So in the majority, we, the generation which was born in the Soviet Union grew up the normal thinking people. And, thanks to reason of the parents who though read similar nonsense, but nevertheless not always it was followed, we kept ability to think freely, is not clamped also without complexes.the Nature is wise
, the main thing that there was enough mind to listen to the heart.