When to send the child to free floating?
parents ask This question, hardly their child is above “kolyasochny“ age. And when the kid goes to kindergarten or to school, mothers and fathers continue to doubt: how many independence can allow it...
First what it is worth paying attention to parents to -, peers of their child are how independent.Complexes begin
when he feels like “black sheep“: all walk in the yard without supervision, and he is brought by the grandmother. Or, on the contrary, from school schoolmates go with mother, and yours “stamps“ one.
the First exit to the street
In 6 years the child can quite leave one to the yard. But before the first exit it makes sense to lose possible situations.
Here it leaves the apartment. Whether one can go down in the elevator? What to do if it gets stuck? Or on some floor the bad uncle will enter a cabin? And if you are invited in the elevator by the aunty, in appearance kind, but unfamiliar? How to refuse that it not to offend?the child is farther than
leaves to the yard. How not to be run over by the car approaching the house? What to do if children agitate to run on building where there is so much interesting? And if some the uncle calls on a visit, suggests to look at a thoroughbred puppy?. And here bums collect bottles. Whether it is necessary to be frightened them? Or boys who not only are not afraid of them are right, but even tease? And here children kindled a fire directly near the cars standing at the house... Questions here darkness. Listen as your child answers them. It will become clear to you whether it is possible to entrust it independent walk or still to move for the handle.
Releasing its one, in advance stipulate iron rules which has to be a little, but which have to be carried out implicitly. For example, it is impossible to leave the yard. Or to come home to friends, without having reported about it to you. Even for a minute! The violator of bans follows for a long time, at least for a week, to deprive of the right to walk to one. If you do not want in several years when your child becomes a teenager, to go crazy, waiting for it at night, accustom him since the childhood that you always know where it and with whom.
How many independence to give to the school student
to Junior school pupils can charge to descend in shop. Usually they do it with pleasure, flatters them that they “as big“. Only be not overzealous in this eagerness: purchase has to be simple (for example, bread or milk) and inexpensive, and shop - near the house.here in school and back many parents accompany with
A children of years to 11 - 12. And not only for safety reasons, but also from - for need for initial classes to communicate constantly with the teacher of a study occasion. So do not worry from - about the fact that you at the age of your child were more independently. Times changed. At the same age it is quite possible to allow the son or the daughter to go to one somewhere by the tram, the bus or the subway. Better without changes and, of course, during daylight hours. Before a trip once again speak his route with the child and repeat “rules“ of type not to stand at edge of a platform, to cross the street only on transition etc. Main same principle: obligatory notice of parents on the residence and observance of arrangements.
For lies or forgetfulness - immediate “disfranchisement“. At preadolescent age freedom of movements are still the desired privilege, but not something self-evident, and try to use it to bring up a sense of responsibility in children.the Teenager wants
even more independence. The parents frightened of drug addiction on the contrary, more tightly tighten reins. The eleven-year-old child still is afraid of much and it is more difficult to drag him in a low company. Fourteen-year-old has a longing for deeds, and in this sense to leave them unguarded much more risky.
the Child will not run away from the house which is attractive both to it, and to his friends. And to sate quite natural thirst of the teenager for romanticism, arrange him in some detsko - junior club where go hiking. Thus, it will be able to go without you for the city (essential increase in independence!) but will be under supervision of the adult head of club.
If the child does not want to walk without adults?
It happens too. Other parents literally with fight turn out children on the street, repeating that it is necessary to breathe fresh air. And children go obstinate and even roll up hysterics.
In my opinion, no fresh air does cost children`s tears. Wishing to the child of health, parents actually loosen to it nervous system, turning such joyful event as walk, into a heavy, hated duty. It is better to leave the child at home and to try to understand in what business. Perhaps he is offended by children? Or he hesitates to get acquainted with them?by
Sometimes behind children`s obstinacy conceal fears - the most different, up to fear of the elevator or badly lit entrance. Children, especially boys, can long not admit it, being ashamed of sneers. Then especially it is not necessary to push out violently them on the street. Try to eliminate these fears: go down in the hour agreed to the yard that the child did not need to enter to one an entrance, help it to bring friends. Then it will be easier to break a psychological barrier and to go outside.