It Part 2Chapter 2
Ahead were four Christmas days off. Four days of inaction and lazy luxury First of all we recovered … where you think? And where first of all goes, arrived to stay for a while the woman? Correctly! On shops. We went marketing the largest in the city that “to buy all necessary“. “All necessary“ hardly held in three big packages, and I did not even try to resist her consumer greed. As if the retired ballerina, she attacked on meat counters, intending to buy up everything that on them was. Then the turn of a dairy row, vegetable, fruit came. I, was, tried to bring to reason her, suggesting not to hurry, but all my judicious councils were turned a deaf ear.
Having bought a lot of stuff including absolutely superfluous, and hardly moving legs under the pleasant burden, we went to an exit when, suddenly, in the neighboring pavilion she noticed department of ladies` headdresses. And, of course, right there remembered that “to it himself needs to pick up a hat“. I obediently covered with bags stretched on it. In department of hats she right there took notice of “a charming pestsovy ushanochka“. Tried on it. Then one more. Still. And still. Then we glanced in shop to the oseena - spring footwear as to it “himself needed to pick up some boots“. First couple, the second, third … Earlier, I already surely would lose patience because it is difficult sane to suffer to the person long time near himself the person of the mad. And the fact that the woman from the person sensible turns into the person with a sumasshedchinka hardly her leg crosses a threshold of some boutique and hypermarket, I had no doubts long ago. But this time, this crazy gloss in her eyes, the hasty movements of hands and sharp need for everything as if time stole all things from it and it remained absolutely naked, raised at me only a weak smile with inflow of unclear tenderness and patience to all its whims.
In an hour, having bypassed almost all shops with footwear and headdresses, we, at last, got out to a great wild world and went home. Houses, having got tired, I failed and wearily stretched on a sofa. Its energy seemed inexhaustible and did not cease to burst forth the powerful fountain, drenching me with the splashes. Hardly we from a frost became hollow to the house as she right there rushed to cook though in it there was no that urgent need of which it would be possible to think, looking at that race which she suited. While on a plate the pan began to boil, it swept, washed up plates and smeared hands with cream. I looked at it and could not guess that for change happened to it. She was always an active woman who did not sit minutes, idly earlier. But earlier it had a great lot of claims, appear, to everything on light, beginning from the broken sidewalks and finishing slowly beginning to boil pans. Sometimes it, without ceasing, ached and complained of what on the street was cold, and she too warmly put on, and in too warmly and therefore to it hot. It could lament for hours concerning the long road and inconvenient seats in the car. She was upset from - for the fact that she bought white loaf, instead of black and that she cannot eat it. She did not obey my councils, doing everything on the and very much was surprised when she made mistakes. In a word, she was the ordinary living woman with a whimsical claim to all surrounding. But now … Now in it almost inaudible change was felt. She did not complain. Did not ache and did not lament. And with firmness and patiently went on a frost, overcame snowdrifts and stood turns.
In the evening I noticed that she, having put on my cap, left to my room where by a hasty voice zabubnit a prayer. Later she prayed twice a day. In the morning and in the evening.
It became softer and more rigid. Gestures got confidence. Look softness and mildness. What change was, I did not guess yet, and to ask directly me there was not enough determination because I felt that something big was behind all these changes and important. Something intimate and to me relations not having.
It was to me an example. Example of courage, optimism and will. Has to admit that shortly before her arrival I began to fall that is called. Barchelor life in the thrown den, problems at work and crisis of middle age in which I not really believed set to me the seal of fatigue and despair. Bothered to do me every week clear-out for this purpose only that already through a two-three of days to grow with the mountain of dirty ware again, to become covered by a thick dust layer and once again to be perplexed what to prepare for me for dinner. Quite often, for removal of a stress, I strong drank that for the morning even not to feel all a familiar hangover. Even it avoided me. At work I felt sick from uncountable pieces of paper in which I had to be engaged. Career development was not expected, and the administration flew into a rage every day. It was impossible to believe in God. In a word, I was bored by everything and even I am.
As far as the man is able not to love himself, so the woman is able to love herself. The woman will not make against herself and the 100-th share of those idiocies which the man against himself makes regularly. She will not get drunk to unconsciousness to get involved in some most stupid unpleasant incident. Will not go outside without warm clothes that then week to sneeze and cough, swallowing of some poison, it seems to “Terafl“. It for weeks will not eat the disgusting hamburgers which are washed down by strong coffee. She will not argue with the administration, arguing the point of view. Because the woman is a prudence. The woman is a practicality. The woman is a thrift. It has the concept about a debt. About honor. About decency. And nobody in abnormality of the opinions will be able to overpersuade her.
The woman is an optimism. May you present the woman - the pessimist? The woman - the pessimist - so rare phenomenon, as well as the child - the pessimist. Pessimism is not peculiar to the woman by nature. Pessimism - attitude more true and deep, but also less useful. Optimism - the phenomenon thoughtless and misleading. The first is peculiar to important and gloomy men more. The second - to carefree children and women.
And so, having wallowed in the highbrow pessimism, I floated on the river of life there where its current carried me. To flounder hands and legs that to change something, me was laziness. Life was empty and sad as an empty box from under cake which was eaten long ago.