``Remove it immediately!`` And later? How to change style
Now there are a lot of different TV shows on the different channels devoted to “magic transformations“ from a gray mouse in the beauty: “A fashionable sentence“, “Remove it immediately!“ “Reset“. Women actually go there to change the life - but that it is surprising how shows experience, most often after transfer everything falls back into place. Why?
the Plot usually is as follows: once upon a time there was an ordinary girl / woman (sometimes the grandmother), but men avoided, friends were not, career did not develop, and in general somehow everything was boring and sad... And then it came to the telecast, made the picture of beauty with fashionable clothes of it, praised it is verbose in the presence of relatives and friends - and everything at it became good. Well, or it will be good - fairy tales usually so come to an end.
of Heroines of transfers about “magic transformations“ can conditionally be divided into several groups.
1. Women of difficult destiny
It is the most numerous group, women after heavy divorce belong here; girls with authoritative parents; women with the “problem“ appearance which is giving rise to various complexes. Owing to the serious reasons and circumstances they cease to watch themselves, look bad that has an adverse effect on their career and private life.
2. Women with not banal addictions
These women adhere to the certain habits not always causing positive reaction in people around. They put on in Gothic style, in style “pink“ Barbie, someone prefers ethnic - hop / reggae / fate - N - a beater styles. It seems to them that it allocates them from crowd, does unique, original, reflects their rich inner world. Such living and “wardrobe“ position frightens off decent employers and decent men.
3. Young mothers
This group does not need the detailed characteristic. I suspect that change of life priorities, an enormous lack of time and infinite fatigue mixed up with a chronic sleep debt is familiar to most of women who have at least one child. Sometimes young mothers come back to themselves former - charming and attractive as soon as the child becomes more senior. Or they finally forget about themselves - then heroines are brought on similar programs by careful mothers, sisters - or the indignant husbands (though I do not understand the last: if the woman - darling why it is necessary to be indignant but not to make everything that is possible and not to help her?) .
4. Idlers or ignoramuses
In this group belong women and girls which or laziness and a reluctance to take care of the own life, or there is not enough knowledge, experience, taste to look on the five. However, if to trust programs about “magic transformations“, in most cases all their heroines - under three previous masks - are lazy and ignorant therefore it is enough to make efforts, to add self-confidence, to lower laziness - and happiness will be increased.
But whether so it actually?
our television in general loves “magic transformations“. There is a format of TV programs very similar on described above: transformation of a conventional dwelling into “the house of dream“. You watched sometime the releases of such transfers devoted to volume how owners lived in “mansion“ further and what with them was done subsequently? History is in most cases identical: the interiors created without direct participation of owners were exposed inevitable, relentless and not always to beautiful alteration. Sooner or later owners of apartments changed them back “under themselves“, and from remarkable repair and original design decisions there was a minimum.
Grudges that the “changed“ girls - but not right after, and half-year later - are not shown on the TV. I suspect that similar transfer would be instructive. But there was the English program about “the robot - the converter“ which showed heroes in several months: and so, the majority came back to an initial image, and only the few really changed not only appearance, but also life.
Resistance to changes: why?
the whole science which is engaged in a subject of resistance to changes Exists. However, she studies how workers resist changes in work of the company. But the reasons, consequences - and recommendations of researchers - are quite applicable also in case of sudden changes in appearance - especially someone imposed.James About “Toole in the book “Directing Changes“ allocated to
more than three tens reasons of resistance to changes among which:
- inertia (“So many forces will be required to grow thin! Well it!“), satisfaction (“I and such am pleasant to myself“),
- fear (“And whether red color will go to me?.“),
- futility (“All the same men will not pay attention to me“),
- shortage of knowledge (“I absolutely understand nothing fashion“),
- collective imaginations (“I - that know that pink color - a new trend!“),
- ideology (“Appearance not the main thing. But I have a rich inner world!“),
- and even a banal habit (“I all life so put on!“ ).
to the fact that people appear on transfers about “transformations“ where they in most cases according to the scenario are brought by friends and relatives.having Already been
on shootings, heroines pass, - agrees besides About “Tula, - six stages of resistance to changes:
- Passivity (heroines on transfer bring, but they internally do not agree with criticism).
- Denial (heroines tell about the living position and deny that they have problems)
- Rage (it is necessary part for high ratings of any TV shows)
- Negotiations (it are engaged the most part of transfer, persuading and convincing heroines to go for experiments with appearance)
- Crisis (having seen itself updated in a mirror, having heard reaction to the “new“ appearance from the side of the hall or authoritative experts, heroines of transfer feel pleasant shock)
- Acceptance (on a wave of positive emotions of the heroine promise “to improve“ and adhere to the scheduled course).
the Woman changed
appearance: what`s next?
So why changes even if they to the best, are also approved by close people and relatives, are not fixed?the Answer is simple
: heroines are released ““. They come back to a habitual way of life. But for overcoming of inertia, fixing of positive changes, according to researchers of this problem, it is necessary to work on itself further, after the program.as
according to Donald Sal, described in the book “Why the Good Companies Fail and as Outstanding Managers Revive Them“, setting before itself the new purpose, it is necessary to consider the available system of values . If heroines firmly believe that men look for women with a rich inner world, but not a stylish hairdress and fashionable clothes, then hardly, having returned with a TV show, they in a month will go to a hairdressing salon again and will regularly begin to go shopping in search of new things.Baudot Schaefer`s
, the recognized expert in achievement of financial independence and success, in all the books writes that changes are an adequate price of success, but it is necessary to begin them with change of a mentality. So for preservation of a positive effect heroines should believe that the hairdress and clothes at least will not damage.John Kotter in the book “Ahead of Changes“ points
to an important role of communications, and in particular training , at introduction of changes. Having returned to habitual life, heroines should be interested in fashion, cosmetology novelties, effective fitness - programs, generally, to broaden horizons and to study simply.
the Author also recommends to create for effective introduction of changes with the coalition ilny, authoritative and committed to these changes . It is important that upon return from transfer, heroines were supported, close people whose opinion is highly appreciated, for example, mother, the husband or children directed and praised.
Well and at last Jan Kattsenbakh, one of authors of the book “Leaders of Original Changes“, writes that it is important to achieve real, tangible results at the earliest stages of process . The strongest motivator will begin to keep changes in appearance for heroines visits of cinema, on an exhibition, in cafe where they will catch a set of delighted looks from men. So it is desirable to do similar sorties to a thicket, and to begin - at once after show.But, maybe, those heroines who come back to themselves, the habitual images are right
? Whether these changes are necessary to them actually?. Certainly, to solve to women. But I agree with one of the well-known laws of Murphy: “Change - an integral part of constancy“ . In other words, constantly changing, all of us equally remain ourselves. So why not to try?