I look for the fellow traveler - we select the company for rest with the child of
you gather in a trip with the child and decide to go with someone - we will tell, with the same cheerful and active mother. Even if with well familiar, but with which you still did not go anywhere. What from this will leave actually - it is unknown. How it is correct to choose fellow travelers that rest was successful what to discuss and what to agree in advance about? The list of important questions was prepared by the skilled traveler and mother of two children Ksenia Chesnokova.
Till the birth of children I with pleasure traveled one. Or with the girlfriend: we approximately time for a trip took offense at each other, cried on corners, then embraced and reconciled. Or with the husband: we swore more often, but it was not so important, to reconcile with the husband - business not cunning.
With the birth of children I did not cease to travel, but now I prefer trips to the companies - in the company of other children (to them so more cheerfully) and parents (to me is so more cheerful and quieter).
At first on open spaces of the Internet almost ideal Lenka was found: we went for a month to Thailand and Vietnam with children. The next year with us there went two more girlfriends with children. With one we proputeshestvovat all month, and with another swore so that we do not communicate since then at all. More than a year later repeated travel with that from girlfriends with which, it seems, it was good troubled us.
But again incidentally from the same Internet was come up by Masha who thrust in the company in Tye, and a year later upon Bali. And I am ready to go with it at the end of the earth though in Moscow we almost do not communicate. And then in Indonesia were in turn two different Katya with the different three-year-old sons.I for myself accurately understood
For all this time: the fellow traveler surely has to have one important property. He has to love your children, and you are his children, then any conflict will be settled easily.to avoid unpleasant surprises, to the choice of the fellow traveler - and, most likely, all - fellow travelers - should suit
seriously. There are questions which should be discussed before joint travel:
- the Fellow traveler has to be absolutely independent . You have to understand that if something in each other does not arrange (at rate of movement, in where one of you wants, in comfort of housing), then you are quietly divided. For what term? On my travel there were different options. Absolutely: we continue rest separately. Or it is temporary: for example, I go to some distant village, and my partner lies on the beach meanwhile, and then we reunite. Or just we part on different hotels: and nothing prevents to meet in the afternoon to bathe, eat, take a walk together. It is far better, than to test constant irritation. Also it is not necessary to break plans and to refuse from conceived if the fellow traveler does not decide or does not want to keep you the company in any adventure.
- Should clear a question, at once how to lodge: in one number or the house - or in different . In my practice there were offenses when suddenly the person understood that he should live separately, that is to pay twice more. It is possible to alternate together - separately, depending on mood and type of housing which managed to be found. It is necessary that it did without offenses too. All can want a privacy.
- needs to discuss an approximate route in advance - otherwise it can turn out that you have very different expectations from rest. Start up a route will be absolutely approximate: let`s tell, we are going to stick out at the sea all the time, to move once a week or all the time to move. For example, my fellow traveler has to foreknow that I can leave at 6 in the morning if seems to me that it will be so simpler to endure moving to other city that I love night moving because children sleep that I can be dragged on foot several kilometers if I do not like the price of a taxi. Should tell
- to the fellow traveler, on what category of housing and food you count . You want to have always the conditioner and to eat only at very decent restaurants? Or, on the contrary, to live in absolutely unpretentious hostels and is in street snack bars? Both options have the right for existence, but to understand whether your intentions better here, but not on the place coincide. Then it will become clear whether there will be able to be you together or just you will go to one city - on one island sometimes to meet to drink to tea - to talk for life.
- In general, if you are going to travel with children, food needs to be discussed in detail . The fellow traveler prefers full-fledged three meals a day? Houses or in cafe? To it not laziness to prepare and spend on it precious time? Or he wants to prepare in turn and does not agree that in your watch children ate cookies with ice cream?
- your partner punished the child, without having bought it frozen . Or chocolate is impossible for the child. Or she does not want to buy expensive toy. My position: I can buy at the same time the child ice cream, chocolate and a toy. In spite of the fact that it will be offensive for that child, and it is difficult to parent to explain why to one yes, and to another - no. I can not buy (naturally, I not for harm will buy everything that it is impossible for another). But if my child wants, and I do not see the reasons to refuse - I will buy. Also I will not take offense if the fellow traveler arrives also. Specify that this subject is suspected by other mother - it can become a subject of constant offenses.
- In general at the choice of the fellow traveler should be understood, as it brings up the child . If you carry in a baby sling and nurse, the person who insists that you should not take the child on hands too often, and a pacifier - panacea from dragging in a mouth of everything can irritate you. To the contrary, respectively.
- Estimate age of children . In general, this point is not so important, but the closer on age your children, the more interesting to it with each other - and the quicker you with the fellow traveler will bring your needs together.
- needs to prepare morally that children will not find a common language . They can fight, be malicious, provoke each other. In my opinion, for normal coexistence it is necessary to treat very kindly other people`s children . To understand them, to explain to the child why they so behave and to try to make friends as a result children. If each parent just supports the child, and foreign child will irritate, nothing acceptable will leave: both children will not make friends, and parents will quarrel. If it is important
- for you, it is necessary to discuss the relation to the blue screen , and also existence of addictions .
- Pay attention to that, what experience of independent travel at your fellow traveler . If one - the skilled traveler, and another - is not present, then the organizer on a trip will become inevitable the first . Just be going not to be irritated and not to take offense because the fellow traveler should learn much still. If you are not ready to the leading role - look for skilled. Decide by
- on the mode. needs to be understood who got used in to get up how many - it, by the way, can change on travel. If one - “owl“, and another - “lark“, then it is necessary to consider it. If you are going to live in one room: during a rain or cold “owl“ will have near by the getting up early neighbors who have no place to get to, and “lark“ - sleeping, from - for whom it is necessary to behave more quietly.
I the most difficult question for me: what to do if you understand that you do not want to continue travel with this person any more? How to tell not to offend if all it seems to it normal, and you more well cannot! Somebody has an algorithm?