Darya Dontsova: how to win against cancer of
the Famous writer Darya Dontsova presented the new book. But this time not the ironical detective story and not the collection of culinary recipes, and extremely frank story about how she fought against a dreadful disease - breast cancer. And as won.
the Fragment from the book “I Very Much Want to Live“ which we publish - how the friend of the writer Vladimir Tsekhnovicher, as she said, “forced to shudder and reflect“.
- the Illness should not be the main event in your life at all. What you think of when you wake up? Only it is honest!
- how today I feel, - I sighed.- it is wrong
! - Volodya hissed. - You are obliged to remember at first about Mashka, it should be fed and taken away in school. Then boys, husband, work. An illness on the 100-th place. Present that to you on a visit there arrived the aunt from the province, lodged for a year, lives and aches:“ Grushenka, now eight morning, bring me to the museum... Then in cafe, then in theater... And for the night read me the book... Do not leave me for a second one!“ Your reaction?
- Most likely, I in polite, but rather categorical form will let know to the smart aleck that she can live in my house, but is constant entertain her I have no time. I should carry out household chores, to care for a family. However, I am ready to keep in day off to it the company for a visit of conservatory - inconveniently absolutely to disregard the guest. Approximately so, - I answered.Volodya knocked
a fist on a chair.
- it is excellent.“ Oncology“ - so call the impudent aunt which arrived to stay for a while without invitation. What the hell you constantly are engaged in it? Put the smart aleck to itself on the head and you drag it! Just include cancer in the life, you with it will spend more than a year hand in hand. But let keeps at a distance. It at all here not the owner, and part of the schedule. In the morning any affairs, then you run on radiation therapy, after a lunch teach private lessons. Unless you panic from - for the fact that it is necessary to walk twice a day in the yard with Cherry? Treat an illness, as a poodle. It should be dragged on a lead to the doctor. Point. Now such stage of life, then will be another, the third. Remember the schoolmates: as soon as they saw that to you to spit on teasers, lagged behind. Cancer is very similar to harmful school students. Everything, go to bed!
Tsekhnovicher got up, went to a door, but on a threshold turned back.
- did not think that you such weak - decided to give up, having received the first kick from destiny. On light it is full of people to whom it is much worse, than you, and nothing, live to themselves normally. And you are surrounded with attention, have the beautiful husband, wonderful children, good work, the apartment and pour snivels from - for the fact that it is necessary to be treated. “Regret, I have a breast cancer...“ Fie directly! In your case there are no reasons for pity. Though, I am not right, you should sympathize only from - for your nonsense. At you everything is good, the illness already slowly recedes, and you turned in shivering jelly. Darling of people pulls out itself from a grave, but also itself keeps within there. And any doctor on light will not help the little fool who daily speaks to herself: “I by all means will die!“
Vovka left. I was covered with a blanket with the head, curled up, wanted on a habit to begin to cry, but tears from eyes did not pour down. It seems that the best friend of the husband is absolutely right - it is impossible to regard an illness as of paramount importance, to submit to it. If you are afraid of demons at bright electric light, in the dark easily you will die of fear. It is necessary to become brave and to treat cancer, as the temporary satellite. I managed to agree with migraine, and it does not stick to me every day any more. And why? Because I told myself:“ I am not afraid of headache attacks any more. Will ache so will ache, I will go to bed, and a point“. The main thing to win against fear, to understand: oncology for me not an exclusive event, but the ordinary. Arrived to clinic, lay down under the device and rushed off on affairs. And it is impossible to complain about destiny at all, to consider itself as the razneschastny sufferer for whom the most terrible fate waits.by
Right there remembered a parable which my grandmother of Afanasy Konstantinovna liked to tell.
“... The man by the name of Ivan very much complained about the life, considered it as ordeal and very much envied neighbors at whom, in his opinion, everything developed in the best way. Vanya ached, ached, and to him the angel with words suddenly went down:
- I Felt sorry for you, let me help. Ask that you want!
- I drag the Very heavy cross on a back, - Ivan complained, - freight of cares and many grieves is big. Make a favor, replace my cross with another, not heavy, but easy.
the Angel picked up Ivan and came to be together with it in the room entirely filled by crosses.
- Itself find to yourself a burden, - the seraph offered.Wan`s
began to look round. Crosses were the most different - huge of a stone, a tree, iron, met and slightly less, but all the same they looked awful.
Ivan Long paced the room and suddenly, lo and behold, the tiny cross from twigs, makhonkiya lies on a floor, it is less than little finger, light as goose down.the man Seized with
him and cried:
- the Angel, I found to myself a burden! Change my awfully heavy cross for this!the Seraph with a smile answered
- Eh, Ivan... You picked up the cross received from the birth now.- cannot be
, - the man did not believe. - Whose then those iron and stone sculptures?
- Not on the cards yours is heavy, - the envoy of heaven shook the head, - and you weak yes envious. Those huge crosses belong to neighbors who, in your opinion, are much happier than you. The real person with a smile will drag a log, and to the coward and the idler the mote will delay shoulders...“
Ya got out of a bed, approached a window and nestled a forehead on cold glass. Well that, a breast cancer, we will look who whom will eat!at this moment me it became clear to
: in life the new stage begins. I passed a big way. At first did not want to believe that ached, cried, complained about a heartrending experience, hoped that the fairy godmother from nowhere will arrive, will wave a magic wand, and there will be I healthy. Then was frightened of cancer and, thus allowed it to become the main event in the life, itself put a sore on a pedestal. I was weak, coward, frightened to a shiver in knees. Did not hear sensible words of the husband, did not perceive statements about an illness curability. What a sin to conceal - I reveled in sufferings. I so liked to feel sorry for myself, to comb moral wounds! But now the understanding came that I not weak, not poor, not unfortunate, not poor, and am capable to live quietly with an illness, without submitting to it, and eventually by all means I will recover. Why? Yes because the oncology is treated. There is also other answer: I will not die of breast cancer because I do not want to die. I have no right. To me so far early on a next world, at me on it it is full of affairs.
From the book “I very much want to live. My personal experience“