Whims of godsOn Friday after work before going home that there on a habit to have supper nourishingly the cooled-down yesterday`s stake and it is lazy to be extended in front of the old TV, I decided to glance on a spark in a pub that I was at a brand new gas station, in hundred meters from the house.
Outside stood February, and so far I reached to the treasured place, gray shades of a faint hope behind windows of the bus were replaced by ink water colors of blank despair, and from the sky fell down is rainy - snow porridge.
Weather was disgusting and if not thought of a hot grog with the glazed puff in a hospitable institution behind turn, I would leave at the stop, and immediately would hurry to country “country house“ from two rooms and to an old black cat of the Gipsy nationality (the animal was black as night, it is thievish and lazy), which patiently expected every evening my return.
Having gone out of the bus and having managed to become covered slightly by snow-white porridge, I almost rushed into this silent den of silent vicious passions, and, slightly considerably having nodded through a bar rack to the hostess, the young and attractive maiden with a northern dialect which was excessively sad for such hilarious hole, for a start flopped for a free little table.
In the bar, except me, in the neighbourhood sat two men of the shabby exterior - ordinary frequenters of such unpretentious places, one of which was to me from where that he is familiar.
having A little recovered the breath, I rose and approached a rack to make the order as it was accepted there. Usually, waiters and waitresses approach you to serve, but for myself I drew a conclusion that the snack bar is worse, the more strict there orders and therefore never waited for the waiter.
- Grog, as usual, more hotly, and chocolate sloyenka, - I said and
buried in the purse in search of a suitable trifle which owners of such institutions asked eternally.
- Weather today dog - neither winter, nor fall - smiling, the very young barmensha answered me with
, giving a high glass with the handle and a plyatka of chocolate fancy bread.
- Yes, and a dog you will not turn out, - I took both hands being due
to me an entertainment and carefully started wandering on the place.
of the Man, sitting at my back conspiratorially were whispered about something, but to me had no time for them. Aroma of hot rum struck to me in nostrils, puff also surprisingly freshened, and I selflessly was sent by soul and a body to their intoxicating power.
On the TV reported that weather will be same opposite tomorrow, as well as today - a sleet and above-zero temperature, and I, having quickly drained a mug, was already was going to rise after the second portion of hot rum as suddenly distinctly heard behind the back of the word “nasty Bobbie“ (in Russian “cop“, “garbage“). These two words were distinctly pronounced and obviously aimed in my unprotected back that it simply was necessary to take them personally.
without having given a sign, I approached a rack and, having ordered still a mug of a hot grog, I as if accidentally turned back on the couple sitting at the next little table. Guys were already under a fair hmelk, but the fact that got drunk much quicker than the stronger drinking companion more young.
Ya recognized his uncombed physiognomy: he as well as I lived in this area, and me quite often was necessary to see it, as a rule, fairly filled in for a collar - these chubby lips and round osolovely eyes were difficult to be confused with someone`s others.
I once we already met in the same pub. That time this debauchee, as always, was strong poddaty, and took me for someone another with whom he obviously did not sympathize. I tried to assure it that I see it for the first time, but the guy, so being confident in myself as far as I am drunk, continued to send various threats to my address. Having taken
a hot mug, I slowly returned on the bench. On a body the exciting languor quickly spread, rum pleasantly tickled to me the sky. If not a drunk whispering behind the back, me it would be possible to count as the biggest lucky person on light. But, as we know, absolute happiness on light does not happen.
- Yes it it … it, I speak to you, - the nasal tenorok reached me.
- More quietly - the second, more reserved bass tried to bring to reason him.
- Yes to me on horse-radish, I am not afraid, - more and more the tenorok grew bolder.
- You are mistaken - the bass hooted uncertainly.
- I never am mistaken - the tenorok squalled surely.
At last having drunk up the cheap gin, and having thought the remains of brains that still
forces will be necessary for them somehow to get home, guys rose and began to be torn hardly to an exit.
Which - as having passed me, my old acquaintance stopped, looked at me and slyunyavo proshepelyavit:
- Che, on a subwhisper you sit? Well, listen, listen. Write, write.
- You confuse me to someone, kind - I quietly answered.
- I never confuse anything. You from the fourth office. Yes, constable. I will never forget you.
This guy obviously began to irritate me the stupid obstinacy.
Ya of people of a peace profession, I work as the marketing manager at plant on production of brass cranes, nobody never had relations to police. Even on military collecting I was caught only from the third attempt - so I hated army and everything that is connected with it. And police - the same army, with the same stupid subordination and rules.
- I once again repeat, guys, you confuse me to someone. I have no relation to police.
- Do not whistle, I remembered you, the constable, - disheveled the drunkard on envy it was self-confident, - but we still will meet, I promise you.
Both debauchees fell out of doors, loudly discussing something. It was easy
to guess that.
- Here there are simpletons, tell the truth - do not believe - I as if
addressing the girl for a rack, &ndash shy said; now this drunk clodhopper it is rested proves to the second that I - it not I. Though you burst. There are silly people.
Ya saw that the maiden behind a rack somehow unnaturally strained. Her lips clenched, she nervously considered by
banknotes from cash desk.
“Really and she believed that I am a police dog?“ - I thought. “Here, pancake, ridiculous life: you tell to
the truth - do not believe. You lie - believe. That for people“.
Ya drank up the cooled-down grog, thanked the barmensha which grew cold to me, and, having clasped on all buttons of a coat, went outside during a rain. Passing
on “zebra“ at gas meters, in the twilight I suddenly saw familiar figures of my importunate guests.
- Hey, Bobbie, wait, there is a conversation, - my old acquaintances obviously wished to continue ours for me absolutely unpleasant acquaintance.
- Well, che it is necessary? I have not enough time.
- You badly arrive. You overhear che - that, you sniff up, - hardly that which “got to the core“ of me moved language.
- Listen, guys, I already told you: you were mistaken. I have to police no relation … - I did not manage to finish speaking as the uncombed spindle-legs hit me on a face. The blow was unexpected and this bumpkin was nearly twice larger than me. I reeled, and, having dropped to one knee, having nearly overturned in dirt. In a mouth became solono and in a disgusting way.
- Here, the devil - I swelled up and, having waved from surprise hands, tried to protect himself from the second blow. But the second bouncer clasped me with hands behind, like a hoop, and held until his friend aimed the fist in me for the second time.
Ya understood that if I do not escape, me - a cover. “These strong children moreover under the influence of fumes of wine, can kill easily me“ - flew at me in the head.
Immediately, I sharply bent down forward, then back, then again forward. But the robust fellow behind me did not weaken a grasp. I obviously did not have puny strength. I bent down again forward, saw a leg in a dirty leather boot and that was urine of the boot heeled on a leg to it in a shin somewhere. The roar similar to bull low was distributed, hands were unclenched, and, having rushed aside, I for some reason snatched out from an inside pocket the mobile phone - rather for fear, than for safety reasons, and, without dialing numbers, shouted in a tube: “Weaver`s constable! Weaver`s constable! On a gasoline station on Mardi - Lane immediately armed dress! Armed attack on the police officer! Attackers two! Both are drunk! How understood?“.
the Situation was comic - I would not be believed also by five-year-old boys - but the attacking spindle-legs it seemed in a minute sobered up and, without understanding nuances - as I managed, without dialing numbers to phone in a police station why the constable of police showed such weakness in resistance to two tipsy strappers - scolding violently, rushed in different directions.
I, without remembering itself for fear, arrived home, it was washed and, without having had supper, got under a blanket. My hands still shivered. I am a peace person, even coward. But this time I managed to cope with two drunk spindle-legs.
to toss Sherry`s shot glass Since then how many I would not come into a pub on a gas station or to get warm a hot grog - at first with the heart beating for fear, and then it is surer, - I never saw “friends“. Them as if also the trace caught a cold.
Moreover, on the area spread hearing that I am a cool police officer, a thunder-storm small and not really punks, coped with two armed criminals alone. All my attempts to “justify“ oneself, explain to respectable inhabitants of the suburb that any I not the police officer, were turned by them a deaf ear.
I Should have appeared in a familiar pub as all talk calmed down, men validly glanced at me frowningly, women looked with obvious admiration, and to me it became awkward and uncomfortable, despite all my heroism.
even came To me from the fourth police station. “We know that how you dexterously inflated these gawks, having been called the police officer. Yes, yes, it is very amusing. It`s killing! But the fact that you finished two armed bandits coped with them alone, does you credit“.
Oh, yes. I was even wanted to be awarded. Yes, yes. Only what medal - I did not ask. Nothing, I will ask next time when arrive to me from Head police department. Or Skotland - Yard can from. You never can tell? My glory, everything grows.