Rus Articles Journal

Whether the friendship between the former spouses is possible?

break up more than a half of marriages Presently. Many are concerned by a question of whether it is necessary to build up the friendly relationship with former. Especially as life in certain cases develops so that the former spouses can be in sight of each other or adjoin somehow in professional or other activity.

When to the former spouses it is better for i not to think of friendship?



Divorce is a severe stress for both spouses. Almost always it is followed by strong negative experiences. It can be both offenses, and irritation, and disappointment. In the course of divorce, as a rule, one or both spouses get a psychotrauma for disposal of which in many cases work with the psychologist is expedient.

For this reason relationship of the former spouses after divorce is so difficult. It is enough often one mention of a name to cause all number of negative events and states in memory. Therefore not each broken-up couples are capable to maintain the friendly relations in general.

There is such saying: “Out of sight, out of mind“. People, as a rule, seek to avoid painful feelings, and therefore it is easier for them not to communicate after divorce at all not to chafe sincere wounds.

If after divorce still there are deep wounds from the relations, the former spouses should not maintain the friendly relations. There has to pass some time, perhaps, in the future a lot of things will change. In what the friendly relations with the former partner in marriage can prevent

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of Feeling, arising after divorce, can have dual character. Besides a negative component, there can be an attachment or latent desire and hope for restoration of the relations. In this case it can turn out so that upon the taken place divorce it is endured subjectively as not final and incomplete.

Then any communication can feed hope that everything can be changed. Though such hope is also denied at the level of rational consciousness, it can strongly influence human life and that the most unpleasant, it blocks an opportunity to enter the following full-fledged relations. The former spouse will avoid new acquaintances and will not be able to begin the relation.

When can build up the friendly relationship between the former spouses? whether



And still needs to build up the friendly relationship after divorce? On this question there is no definite answer, and everyone in a concrete case makes the decision.

The friendly relationship can be built up if there are no big spiritual wounds after divorce, and they do not interfere with emergence and development of the new relations in life of the former spouses. If these conditions are met, then the friendly relations can testify to a maturity of the former partners. There are examples of the famous people who could remain full-fledged friends after divorce.

Actually it is not even so much important whether there are these friendly relations how many the fact that both partners managed to overcome the offenses, to cure sincere wounds, to recognize the mistakes, to take out experience and wisdom from the last relations. And the friendly relation, care can be just manifestation of some vital wisdom. And also understanding that, despite parting, the former partner brought something valuable and important in life of another.