What to do if darling does not want to marry?
Exist such type of men whom it is possible to call “imperceptible eagles“. They are able to cause delight in the girl, to cast a condition of euphoria, to present unforgettable feelings. But what then? And then - “pechalka“ … It turns out that they are not ready for the serious relations and do not wish to burden themselves with a family nest.
A what to do to the girl who was fallen in love in it here by the macho? To wait until it ripens? And whether it is possible to prove to it what best wife, than she, not to find? Whether it is worth spending time and forces on such relations if your purpose is creation of a strong and reliable family?
Ideally, the man himself has to understand at what moment of the relation it is necessary to transfer to more serious stage. But what to do if it there is no long period?
Try to find out the reason. If you noticed that your relations obviously clogged also all efforts and hints of you do not bring any result, then it is necessary to decide on direct conversation which purpose will be an identification of the reasons of such situation. Conditionally they can be divided into three groups:
It believes that you meet few, to bring up similar questions. Quite good reason if your relations last less than a year.
U it temporary financial difficulties, which have to be resolved soon. It is the objective reason if only does not serve as cover for real.
Shyness, fear of refusal. also it that the man drags out only because he is too constraining Happens or is afraid to hear in reply “no“. But as soon as he is convinced of your love and devotion, he makes up the mind to a serious step.
Reparable, when performing certain conditions:
It is too young . It is rather serious reason. You can wait when it ripens. But you remember, many psychologists consider that if the man is less than 25 years old, then he is not ready for that responsibility which is assumed by marriage.
He is not sure by of your disinterestedness. If your elect - the man of means, then he can be afraid of the fact that you just want “to warm on it hands“. But it is already a question of trust. If it is absent, it is big minus.
It is possible, it does not trust you because in the past it had a negative experience, and now it projects it on your relations. Or mother constantly repeated to it that “women are dangerous, mercantile and artful beings“, thus, having engendered in his soul unconscious fear to the serious relations. And maybe, a hitch in you if you show barefaced interest in its finance.
In any case, by itself this problem will hardly be resolved, and family therapy will be the most reliable exit from current situation.
the Egocentrism, emotional immaturity, unwillingness to take the responsibility. If your darling accepts the relations without any obligations, then it speaks about presence at it of above-mentioned qualities. But you are amused, most likely, by such deal. It is a heavy, but curable case. If your man everything is recognizes existence of a similar problem and will take certain actions - will address the psychologist, will work the children`s injuries or there will take place training of personal growth, then his living position will exchange.
But at once I want to warn - very few people from men direct the efforts to change of, it is easier to find the girl who will suffer his immaturity.
Fear to finally lose freedom. It is rather common cause. Also it is generated owing to excessive control from the woman. If you manage to leave to the man a certain vital space that he did not feel accountable, then his fears will gradually vanish. Stop to take offense at it for the fact that it went with friends for soccer or in a bath, show respect for its interests. Also you remember - he is not obliged to be always near you.
Mother`s sonny. If the man loves you, but does not decide to make the proposal from - for the fact that your candidacy is not approved by his mother, then it can be the certificate that he is “mother`s darling“. You can confirm this diagnosis by certain tests which are available on the Internet. If suspicions came true, then I hurry to report that similar persons very hard give in to adjustment.
Other family. it is possible, the reason is rather banal - the man already has one marriage and you are for it a mistress. Concerning that, progress in creation of the serious relations with such man is how probable, I think, you guess. If is not present, then communicate to those who already tried to make it.
Clinical “ladies` man“. Perhaps, to your macho it is pleasant to win female hearts, but having reached a clear victory, he loses interest in the victim. One business if thus it raises to itself(himself) a self-assessment. But absolutely another if it turns out that he suffers from “seksogolizm“, it is already much more serious and is hard curable.
Thus, having defined to what category the reason for which your man does not wish to establish a family belongs, you will be able to understand how it is better to work in the circumstances. If it something from the reparable reasons, then one of the offered ways have to trying to affect dynamics of the relations or to think up the option. And if you understand that a hard case and almost incorrigible, then reflect whether it will be better to break off for you these relations and to move off in searches of true love with the suitable person?
But anyway you remember that you are noteworthy care and respect. And allow to treat to nobody you as to temporary or spare option. If the man serious, mature and really loves you, he will not oppose to a marriage.