On what the favor - is more similar to bread or to wine?
Making a gift or rendering service, we create response social obligations. But what happens to influence of gifts and the rendered services after time? Whether services are similar to the bread hardening in consciousness of the recipient and losing over time value? Or they are more similar to wine which value increases over time?
the Answer to this question depends on that, you render service or receive it. In the book of Robert Chaldini “Belief psychology“ cited as an example such experiment. Among the staff of department of customer service of large American airline conducted survey. One half of employees the researcher asked to remember cases when they helped other employees, and other half he asked to remember cases when helped them. Then all participants of research asked to estimate the felt value of service and to mark how long it was rendered.
Results of research showed : interrogated perceived services as very valuable right after they were received, but over time the feeling of value decreased. At those who came to the rescue the return process was observed: right after rendering service it was given smaller value, but over time it increased.
Perhaps, one of the reasons that over time memory of an event is distorted . As people have a tendency to see themselves in the best possible light, recipients can consider that at that time they did not need in such to enormous support. At the same time performers can think that they made even more, than from them it was expected.
There are also consequences affecting efficiency of our ability to convince people around both on a workplace, and beyond its limits. If you made a favor to the colleague or the acquaintance, then
the greatest desire to reciprocate he will test within a short period of time. But when the favor was made to you, it is important to remember ability of people over time to underestimate its value and not to get to category of ungrateful.
If you are not able to recognize all-round price of a favor in weeks, months or even years after events, then as a result can spoil the relations with the one who to you made it. If the favor was made by you, then can badly begin to think of the recipient in connection with his unwillingness to repay to you in kind.
So what can be undertaken to maximize the value of service which we rendered if over time it decreases in the opinion of the recipient? One of ways to remind to the recipient of the value of a gift or service is to tell it that you were happy to help: “It is sure that if I appear in a similar situation, then you will make for me the same“.
The second and potentially more risky strategy - in the repeated statement of value of the previous gift before a new request. Naturally, at such approach you have to carefully
be at loss for words. Attempt to tell something it seems: “You remember, I helped you a few weeks ago? And so, the day of reckoning, the friend came now!“ - it is doomed to a failure. But the polite hint can serve good service.
Though the universal, absolute method of influence on others does not exist, the understanding of those factors which are involved in this process, already is the good beginning. And if nothing helps, remember one the simple rule of an exchange of courtesies : the fly sticks on honey, but not on vinegar. You definitely receive a bigger favor by means of a bottle of vintage wine, than by means of a day before yesterday loaf of bread.
There are even more strategy of belief - in the book of Robert Chaldini “Belief psychology“.