Dependence on darling. Whether the psychotherapy will help?
Any, even the strongest, relationship can reach a deadlock sooner or later. Of course, at the initial stage of love nobody even thinks of it. However nothing is eternal under the sun …
the Gap is always a stress for both, but it is always a little bit easier for the initiator of this gap. And here the strong feeling of fault and fear of loneliness can torment that partner who was left. Emotional cocktail sometimes happens so powerful and destructive for the personality that here just right to give urgent psychological assistance.
First of all there is a question of how to get rid of a strong binding to darling? You with it or with it were connected by very much! You laid so many hopes for these relations! And suddenly everything falls. On applied psychology you will find the mass of a practical advice on this subject in articles. Including to you will surely suggest to switch a vector of the attention to any occupation, new to you: to begin sports trainings, to receive other profession, etc. Also to you will advise to come actively into new contacts and not to forget about already available friends.
All these councils, undoubtedly, are good, but often do not yield any result. Pain from loss is so severe that the person in literal sense loses feeling of reality and all world around for it just ceases to exist. Any attempts to distract from burdensome thoughts by means of external factors will give only short-term effect since the problem essence at the same time is not solved. The skilled psychotherapist can come to the rescue, but it is possible find the good expert not always. And it costs expensive absolutely. The technique offered below successfully is applied by the practicing psychotherapists. It is based on work with subconsciousness and is applied in a Gestalt - therapies.
The essence consists in the following. Close eyes and relax. Nothing has to prevent you to concentrate on the feelings and emotions. Now imagine the person to whom at you so painful attachment. Put yourself near this person. And now attention: you need to see that communication which unites you. Peer in the form of what it? It is often possible to hear the answer that communication presents itself a rope in the form of a rope or dense, but elastic rubber which entangles both hands, and legs.
There are, however, also very extraordinary associations. For example, the person saw the communication in the form of a shank from a shovel. The explanation was the following: the shank both does not allow to come nearer and to release does not release. Give vent to subconsciousness - it will pick up very exact images over which you will be able to think then.
Further when you saw this communication in the form of material object, ask yourself a question whether you want from it to get rid? And here the most difficult begins. The matter is that at this stage it can be found, something you do not want it, or if you want, then communication such is that beyond your powers to break off it. So the person can see in the body hooks from which the tapes going directly to the partner depart. Realizing what pain process of extraction of these hooks can bring, the person can already give up at this stage thought to break link.
So if you faced something similar too, then stop and take a break at least for one day. Having visualized the binding, you made a lot of things as it is.
You will feel that moment when again want to lay therapy. Ask yourself a question: what will be if you break this link now? Almost always answers meet - will be excruciatingly painful. And, as a rule, to both partners. In order that thoughts of it did not frighten you, create to yourself the imagined image of the future elect or darling. Only an image, without concretizing any external lines. You can create the same image also for the partner if you want it, of course. What all this is necessary for? The matter is that from this day you will begin to work on tearing off the communication disturbing you.
If you see a rope, begin to cut it slowly. You see many ribbons? Begin to untie them. It is optional to carry out all work in one day - it is not necessary. Stop while you feel that to you it is very heavy. One fine day you will manage to break this link. What then to do with the broken-off ends? Here everything is easy - just attach these ends to your imagined new elect. Make the same also for the partner whom you so loved - let and him everything will be good. Record the state, realize all event - now you are free and open for the new relations!
The given technology with small changes is applied also during the work with the people who endured death of darling or close relative. The main advantage of this therapy is that it is rather simple in application and does not demand use of the NLP or hypnosis. But you remember that any therapy is always intervention in psychoemotional processes, and therefore it is necessary to work most carefully and accurately here. Protect the darlings and value the relations!