Whether it is possible to return romanticism to the relations? Who will be able to tell
what is love? About! There will be one thousand definitions and all of them will be faithful. But whether we think that the love can be different? Passionate, gentle, native... What can it change, raise and develop together with us? Ourselves do not stand still.
Ya reflected and whether it is possible to return those feelings - flight and euphoria from only one anticipation of appointment to darling? Also asked to reflect on this subject several tens couples, having asked them a question: Whether “It is possible to return romanticism to the relations?“
the Majority interrogated - the young couples living together. Having received questionnaires, I was surprised, are how rational and views of these young people were realistic - as if I received answers from couples which lived together a set of happy years and raised many children and grandsons. But all one after another!
“Generally, 30 - the summer man you will not change! Only if absolutely rag, only to whom such it is necessary?“ (c) (from the questionnaire interrogated).
Strangely enough, girls reconciled to the fact that not to return romanticism to the relations. But it does not mean, as the love passed! Passion - yes, recession happened, but the love did not get to anywhere: it, like energy, passed into other form - care about each other.
You know what is surprising? Any girl did not write that she longs on former times, any did not write that she “brings up“ the man. No, girls accept darlings such what they are, and look for compromises in household questions. Whether it is it - true love?
To my astonishment (and there is a little to regret), there was no word of the complaint on blessed. Here it is strange and as “all men - svo...“?
My belief in stereotypes was broken once and for all. What do you represent at the word “wife“? Such aunt in hair curlers and with a rolling pin? Here not! Now before my internal look - the elegant girl, a reliable support for the husband, the faithful companion, the friend and the adviser.
Yes, not to return romanticism of the first meetings, but it also is not necessary, and is even inappropriate. Those relations that were in the beginning, and what is now - two absolutely different stages in life of two people and to try to make them identical, at least, silly.
Of course, sometimes there is a wish from darling more attention, communication and support - and all this is expressed not in flowers and compliments any more, and in the help with the house, in joint education of the child and the notorious joint choice of wall-paper for repair in the room.
Development of the relations happens when two look not at each other, and in one party, aspire to a common goal and support each other.
And what to do if something in the partner irritates? Well, for example, it scatters socks or leaves a dirty plate directly on a table? Perhaps to try to change it? And again not: “To change something in the neighbor always it seems more simply, than to change own relation to it“. To talk, discuss problem points and that the most important, to speak about the feelings: “It, maybe, and sdelayetvid that to it all the same, but will reel up on a mustache!“
our heroines constantly work on themselves, think out joint occupations, praise darlings for progress and do not forget about small female cunnings.
“It is necessary to appreciate what you have and to enjoy the moments “we together!“
of the Man are insensible blocks in the majority, isn`t it? And at all they do not understand us - girls, truly? I too so thought, did not read answers to questionnaire questions yet. And then re-read again - it is impossible to believe, thoughts of people who sincerely love each other are how similar and value the relations. And why these children do not tell about the love to the ladies? Yes because they are severe getters, they should not part all these pink snivels:
“All know that there are several stages of development of the relations: konfetno - buketny, love and friendly. Girls always remember only the first stage and want that so was always. Well it is normal - they since the childhood read fairy tales about princes on white horses. Only in books do not write what from horses smells, princes wear dirty socks, they are drunk or upset that today nobody was pinned up!“
In fact, men came to the same conclusions, as girls: not to return romanticism and it is not necessary, in the relations it is necessary to keep stability and to become people native each other. Not to try to bring artificially the partner to passionate rushes - it will only spoil what was built for years. Flexibility and patience - such recipe of success removed men.
Much are helped by phone - put a reminder for every month: “A compliment and flowers just like that“ - let according to the schedule, but darling will not notice, and here the act of attention will highly appreciate very much! And again coincidence: “First of all it is necessary to work on itself“ - here so we and we influence at each other that two persons in couple independently come to one conclusion!
There is no limit to perfection and there is always a wish to change something, so really why not to begin with themselves? But I repeat, forgive! As for as me always it seemed, hated to a male of negotiations concerning feelings, and here men surprised: “I advise all at least once a year to talk about the half on a subject “to whom what is not pleasant and how to solve a problem“, at the same time I put emphasis on “once a year“! Otherwise not to avoid quarrels!“
cannot Return romanticism to the relations, but it does not mean that they cannot be recovered - and again men are solidary with girls: “It is not necessary to turn love into domestic squabbles, it is necessary to be attentive to each other“.
It was really surprising and extremely pleasant to me that our heroes did not turn out on different sides of barricades that both parties seek for development of the relations and believe in sincere feeling that grows, develops and even grows old together with them. Perhaps, I was just lucky also all couples to whom I happened to communicate - entirely lucky without problems and adversities? I doubt... Here only they do not neglect everything, and use the efforts to be happy, put on a brick in the house which can safely be called a family.