Why people live with unloved?Each person dreams to meet a kindred spirit, the adherent, the soulmate with he on whom life will go easily and surely. But, alas, so it turns out not at all and not always. Having rejected the banal calculation pushing on the relations deprived of emotions and feelings there are also a delusion, the passing passion, fear not to meet someone else, keeping a tight rein on us near unloved. Why we do not leave?
First and one from the main reasons is stereotypes . Society dictates us standards to which we are compelled or we want to correspond. For example, that the girl after 25 years - the old maid. To save himself from “sticking by fingers“ and morals of more skilled aunts and neigbours, many ladies are ready to live practically with the first comer who will be more or less positive and “suitable“ for their relatives.
The second common cause is a habit which sometimes is even stronger, than the past feelings. The passion dies away, the reciprocity becomes monotonous, but much in common (life, friends, a hobby, family business) that anyway connects two, weakens their will power to break off the relations. Never it is necessary to get used to love! Make each other gifts, romantic surprises, recover feelings unusual pastime and do not give chance to the loved one to become unloved.
For the woman very much it is important to to feel protected and not lonely . Therefore quite often she is able to afford to live with the unloved man only was to whom in the evening to meet from work, to make for it the serious decision and to embrace in a bed.
The underestimated self-assessment forces with unloved to be identical - both men, and women. As speak in such cases: “loves for the fact that he (she) loved“. The person just feels gratitude to the one who fell in love with he (she) it (such) as he (she) is, and cannot throw it even contrary to absence of feelings.
The general children who the man and the woman can have, and also a stamp in the passport - too are the reason not to leave. The desire to keep the relations in order that the child had a father and mother, gives rise to need to live with the unloved person.
In certain cases to it pity obliges . The strangest, but the reason which was not less extended from all. It is a pity to leave the person alone, it is a pity that he can make something with himself, etc. But very often pity develops into hatred, and then about any other feelings in couple out of the question.
the fear of the unknown forces to live with unloved us often . Here, near by - the, not beloved, but such acquaintance and to pain the studied person. And behind a threshold - new who needs to be studied to whom it is necessary to adapt and it is new problems and nerves. So can be, “love comes with habit“?
If you have no former warm feelings to the person any more, release him. Or leave. Do not create illusion which will not bring a sincere pacification to either you, or the partner. You do not hold near yourself foreign happiness and do not miss the.