How to struggle with fears?
One of frequent inquiries - important for many and very painful - is formulated simply: “I have many fears“. What is fear and as to get rid of it?
Fear - one of manifestations of an instinct of self-preservation, the internal state caused by the danger threatening real or imagined. And here it is worth placing emphasis on the word of “imagined“. The fear warns about a situation, potentially dangerous to us. And we define danger degree. The event as our interpretation is not so important.
One man`s meat is another man`s poison. What causes panic horror in one, for another a regular situation. How our predisposition to uneasiness is formed?
The hyper sponsoring parents especially strongly seek to secure the child against dangers of world around. They do it most often, focusing attention of the child on possible threats. High physical activity of the child - the story about the broken extremities and concussion. The cut finger - the detailed description of horrors of blood poisoning. Walk to the neighboring yard - the colourful story about maniacs. Even without realizing, parents often such behavior realize the egoistical needs for control and influence on the child.
There are no words, fear - the most powerful instrument of management, but reflect to what consequences it leads? If at the growing person the basic feeling of safety is not created, namely it gives the chance of full development and success, then the condition of uncertainty in the forces, intensity and search of external protection will become constant companions already of the adult.
The full-fledged care of the child is a formation of trust at it to world around. Warning about danger, it is important to let know that there is a set of reasonable rules which observance will help this danger to avoid. Then into place to all-consuming fear the understanding that the person can influence the events comes. And it gives to confidence.
If we do not know how to behave, i.e. ahead uncertainty, and the confidence is not created, then any unfamiliar situation will be perceived as potentially menacing. But new bears in itself opportunities. Most often, the fear makes active an organism for realization of the avoiding behavior, ubeganiye. Thereby, without allowing to receive something new and limiting the level of claims.
Normally to be afraid of something. But we are afraid exactly until the situation is unknown and potentially dangerous, i.e. beyond our powers. Very often the person admitting that he has many fears is covered with it from the unavailability to bring changes in life and justifies the inertness.
If you really want to move and become stronger, then take courage to understand what causes fear. It is quite possible that it is harmless things. But your imagination draws horrors. Accurate understanding that disturbs you the developed action plan in an unfamiliar situation will allow figuratively “to find the soil sublegs“. And to go forward. Thereby, having begun to operate the fears independently. Having deprived of them the power over you. But it is possible only if you really want to become surer and to move to achievements.
The best way to cope with fear is to meet it face to face.