What to do with the child - the dawdler?
“Dawdler!“ - so usually call the child who does all slowly and inertly. Very slowly gathers - long looks for clothes, long puts on it... Dawdlers irritate. “Dawdler! - we speak with asperity, - laces you tie half an hour!“ “All already wrote down homework, and you only took the handle“, - the teacher says. The dawdler there is always a wish to adjust: quicker, quicker... Whether it is correct? Not quite.
If children bright, that is and others - bright not quite are. And quite even slowed down. It is natural feature of the child and to become angry about it also silly, as well as about the fact that you have only two legs. Such he was given birth by parents. Moreover, when you swear and demand from the child “Well quicker, quicker!“, the child is only distracted by you, gets off and does even more slowly. Do not swear and do not pull the child, it does not help.
Often happens: the child does and so all slowly and if you are angry and him adjust, then even more slowly as though to spite as though specially! Truly, the child is not sillier than you. If you annoy him, he is angry with you and does to you to spite. And what now? To become angry all the same senselessly, from it war will only amplify. 6 - 7 - summer children practically do not see a difference between “quickly“ and “slowly“ and work in that rhythm which for them natural. You treat it quietly, but do not stay idle: sluggishness of the child means only that, as to you, and for the child there will be more additional work. What work? What needs to be done?
You spend at home with the child physical exercises. Any will approach, beginning from finger-type gymnastics. When performing exercises adhere to a certain sequence at speed: slowly - quickly - slowly. Begin all exercises without hurrying that at the child everything turned out, in the middle you can cheerfully strain, but finish again not quickly: the child always has to have feeling of success.
Do all important issues which the child has to do well together with him - until he does not learn to do them rather well. It is necessary to tie laces - begin to do it earlier. Show how it becomes then he has to make it. It is impossible - let trains (without hurrying) over and over again. Why and yes? And it needs to be done until under your priglyad he does not learn to do everything that is necessary day after day - as it is necessary.
If the child near you is engaged in business, for example, in lessons, do not hurry him. It is necessary for you correctly, but not quickly. It is bad if you, showing parental eagerness, hurry: “So, fast tell me the rule“. Especially it is not witty, without having waited for the answer and without having given to the child time for a swing, to accuse him: “Again did not learn“. Perhaps, he knows the rule, but that to remember it and to tell you, it needs a little more time.
Do more often breaks in studies, but occupy them with other reasonable activity. Where other child will be continuously engaged 30 minutes, to the dawdler it is better to take in 15 - 20 minutes a break. But in a break let it moves physically: together with you poprisedat or again will do finger-type gymnastics.
You teach the child not of speed, and accuracy and clearness. More often do something with it together, watching that the child did all most accurately, precisely, consistently as you told and without distracting. It can be sluggish, but has to be accurate and exact. In it be exacting, the dawdler - not permission to sloppiness.
The child can be sluggish, but should not turn into the dawdler. Children are born with different temperaments, but there is no “a temperament of the dawdler“. - are not born dawdlers, become dawdlers if parents resolve or especially support such behavior. Why to the child to become the dawdler? And why to be bright when it is possible to become the dawdler, to come under the spotlight, and for you all will make?
It is not necessary to become angry about dawdlers, it is necessary to care for them because they are our darlings. And our care in teaching the dawdler to do things built and quickly. When the dawdler learns not to distract, will learn to tie dexterously laces also will know in what sequence what to put on, it from the dawdler will turn into our pleasure.
Another thing is that there are dawdlers the presents, and happen - dawdlers specially. The dawdler specially is a child who is quite to himself bright, but near you and in some certain business suddenly becomes the dawdler. Really, an important question concerning the child`s sluggishness: “The child cannot quicker or - does not want“? Your child really slow or bright which hesitates to you to spite hesitates when it is necessary to him? In most cases the difference is well visible: if cannot, it sluggish always and if bright, then - it is selective. For example, if is going to school slowly and writes lessons drowsily, and for the computer dives quickly and there fingers touches quickly - you have not a dawdler, but the child bright.
Bright dawdlers are more adult already know scientific justifications of the right to do as it is convenient to them. Quite with conviction and vigorously you will be told: “I so cannot, well you shout … I forgot everything! It is impossible to me! You do not hurry me, I am lost … I cannot when you me adjust, I can, only when slowly. You do not consider my character and temperament. I am a phlegmatic person with the melancholiac`s elements. And in books write that the temperament does not change, mother!“ There are children who from vital problems easily leave in “to be ill“. Such child goes to the right to be a dawdler and a brake when it is favorable to it.
And what to do with such bright? It is curious that recommendations will be similar.
Do not swear and do not accuse of deception and a lovkachestvo: you will prove nothing, and the relations will be impaired a little. Pretend that you believe that your child just is not able to do everything as it is necessary, and begin it to teach it: as slowly, as it is necessary for it, but it is as inevitable as you will choose. Most likely, you will become not the most interesting episode of his life and if the child understands that the only chance to break from your care loose - to begin to do as you carefully learn, then it so to do also will begin. And it will be quickly enough.
And what difference, specially or not specially it dug earlier? Do not turn into the dawdler, do not dig where all the same you will not understand. And if thanks to all event you learned to teach the child, then the child helped you, and you are good fellows!