What means to listen to the child and to understand him?
are necessary for Children not so much: the love, kindness, caress and an opportunity is more often to spend time with parents. Strangely enough, but novelties of equipment did not add the adult of time - much lack it still catastrophically. So everyday life passes in affairs and cares, and during week-end there is a wish to have a rest and gain strength.
Here also turns out that many children of present generation, being, it seems, near parents, grow up the victims of a parental inattention. Many adults believe that in four - five years the child has to solve many problems. Allegedly quite in power to allow the conflicts with peers and usual household problems to it most - will be more independently. Parents assign themselves a part of detached onlookers who at peak of an aggravation of a situation will render the “only correct“ a verdict. But unless in it the real attention to the child is shown?
What is felt by the child when sees obvious neglect or hardly the attention switched to it? Offense, uncertainty and fear. All this will be shown in isolation or, on the contrary, in excessively display behavior subsequently. Having matured, such people reluctantly remember the childhood and rather cold speak of parents.
The most difficult situation - transferring of model of a dissatisfaction of life of parents on children. In this case the situation is completely neglected. Message such: I could achieve nothing therefore and I will not be able to teach plainly. As a rule, such parents never interfere with the conflicts of children and quietly take down even unfair remarks to their child. The child gets used to the fact that he is worse than others, and is reconciled with such situation. It becomes related with this vital status and leaves with it in adulthood. Therefore it is important to see these prerequisites in time and to cease to push own child in risk group.
The attention is not a selective orientation on someone, and continuous inclusion with it in one action. This process should be started as soon as possible. Many confuse attention to total control. The most important - to respond to the child`s requests, to together solve difficult situations, to trust each other. Why not to allow the child to choose the day in a week - he will always look forward to it. This day it is possible to indulge it with what he loves both in games, and in food.
It is necessary not only to listen that is told and told by the child, but also to hear. Process of communication has to become especially intensive when the child began to attend kindergarten or school. Its narrations about adventures, supervision, experiences - it is not simple to notice an opportunity first signs of incidents, but also to let out all negative through words.
Each person has the personal power picture of the world. The active phase of its filling falls on the childhood when all channels of perception (sense of smell, touch, a review, sensuality, etc.) are not littered yet and work at full capacity. At the same time the child needs to share with someone energy which he received that the chain was full, and the circle is closed. If people around are indifferent to it, then and there are no messages, hands fall, passion passes. Aggression and uncontrollability - the worst options of this position, however quite often uses them the child to draw attention, and at many it works.
Actually to listen to the child and to understand him, titanic efforts are not required at all. Collaboration and interest do education process imperceptible. Children will surely take all the best of the childhood for creation of an independent family and will understand how it is important and it is necessary to pay attention to needs of parents. On it the real, full-fledged and correct relations of generations are also under construction.