How to look after the woman?
become simpler to Get acquainted. Old taboos on “street“ acquaintances are removed, people often visit cafe, restaurants, clubs and other cozy places where it is possible to meet an opposite sex and to start acquaintance, there was an opportunity to get acquainted in virtual space with subsequent “exit“ in reality - opportunities weight. by
For the most modest young people publish various grants to the subject “How to Draw Attention“, “How to Get Acquainted“, “Reference Book of a Pikaper“ and so on. So it is possible to get acquainted. A question in another - and further - what to do? Well, drew attention, got acquainted. And how to keep this attention of the pleasant lady? How to look after and that it is beautiful and that it was pleasant to the lady?
It is good to be a deer. At them everything is clear: it was linked by horns to the rival, won - and received in an award a timid fallow deer. Drake to be quite good too - got bright plumage, and it is possible to be sure that a duck already under a wing. And in general in fauna the issue with courtings was resolved at a dawn of emergence of life, is recognized working, and animals safely use ancient techniques. Not that at people.
Process of courting is the whole problem. It seems that the question of the eaten-away egg is not necessary, and actually everything is much more difficult.
Recently the friend of the son complained of unsuccessful courting - very indicative history. The young man - the higher education, without addictions, independent, self-sufficient, perspective work, a good salary and so on (the long list of merits) - got acquainted with the nice girl - the higher education, without addictions, independent, self-sufficient, perspective work and so on (the long list of merits too). He wanted to look after her beautifully and invited to a concert to the organ hall. Ice cream, cakes, coffee, cognac (the droplet - to coffee) in elite cafe, conversation about Bach and Beethoven, flowers … Generally, the young man rasshibsya in flat cake to make impression on the lady. Made! The girl decided that he is a book boy who lives at the expense of parents and under the wing of strict mother, obchitavshiysya romantic literature and nothing is perfect knowing about real life. The novel did not take place. Young people left, dissatisfied with each other. Heart-breaking history as used to say News agency.
And it is only one history from a great number of similar. The world changes promptly, and manners change too. What else not too was long ago an obligatory component of courting is considered outdated and even inappropriate now. For example, to ask permissions the girl`s parents to this courting. But all right it would be talked only of permission of parents, so also other actions become outdated and at the same time are still considered for many as a stereotype.
On the occasion of the World day of men (it is noted on the first Saturday of November) the dating site eDarling conducted survey, trying to find out - what the man to be pleasant to the woman has to do (see the schedule). That is: as the modern man has to look after the modern woman. Respondents about 19 thousand so answers to questions can be considered safely legitimate were gained.
And here it becomes clear that the vast majority of ladies considers that the man is obliged to open a door before the woman, to help to put on a coat, to take home, to offer a hand at the exit from the car (the trolleybus and so on), to pay the bill in cafe (survey was conducted among inhabitants of the former Soviet Union), but here candies and flowers on each appointment admit already optional (and until recently if not candies then the small bouquet of flowers was considered as the integral appendix of appointment).
Modern women refuse excessive officiality (the address “on formal terms“ is not welcomed by most of respondents), do not wish to hear serenades under windows (obviously, are not too sure of male musical abilities), they do not like flowers in a buttonhole, bows and kisses of a hand. Also ladies consider that they are capable to overcome independently obstacles in the form of pools and fences (and here in former times the gentleman could put the jacket in the middle of the sidewalk - that the lady could pass, without having soiled shoes). And if the man looks at the lady all the time, not to look away from it (earlier - a sign of the enthusiastic relation), then it will be the reason of displeasure in half of cases (actually, obviously, the percent dissatisfied with such attention will be more - if the man does not look away, the woman begins to think that it has something not as it should be with a make-up).
Process of courting becomes simpler - perhaps, the reason in what is accelerated every day of life and becomes complicated life therefore though something needs to be simplified. At the same time from it a certain old-fashioned raid of romanticism - the same flowers in a buttonhole, serenades under windows, kisses of hands and so on disappears. Before the man read on appointments verses (if could not compose, then strangers), now are afraid - the lady can not understand.
And at the same time women are eager for romanticism in courting. Wish to feel the weaker sex, wish security - otherwise in poll such points as opening of a door before the lady, the help in putting on of a coat, farewell to the house and giving of a hand at the exit from the car would not be in the lead.
The task of men is difficult. To be pleasant to the woman, they need to find balance, to pass on a thin side, keeping romanticism of courting and at the same time not especially resting on female weakness and desire of protection (not without reason women refuse the address on formal terms, transfers through pools and fences, bows and kisses of a hand).
Men try. Also it would be quite good if women showed a little condescension to their shy attempts in finding of balance. And that many are already afraid to read verses - as if did not consider not quite adequate!