How to carry on dialogue with teenagers in a modern manner?
Why teenagers cannot, and, the main thing, do not want to behave decently, to talk a quiet voice, not to answer any question: “Chyo?“. They not such rough what want to seem. And business here not in difficult, awkward, teenage age, and in notorious, Her Majesty, Modya.
Presently, unfortunately, fashionably it is ugly itself to behave and biliously messages. Teenagers just are afraid to behave, receive decently good marks - otherwise they will become derelicts at school, “botanists“ is not abruptly. Therefore teenagers defiantly do not answer questions of teachers to receive the two and to be considered by “person“ in a class though well know the passable material. And houses …
Parents clutch at the head, they checked homework, and the child was absolutely ready in all objects. Also “began“: reproaches, lamentations, cautions: “In life you will achieve nothing, you will not get good education - you will finish the days in poverty“.
Unfortunately, adults often make the same mistake. It seems to them that children will obey parents only because they tell “the correct things“. And whether teenagers perceive them as authoritative people - this question adults, for some reason are not set. But saying of “the correct things“ still the insufficient basis to be heard.
And after that why we are surprised that teenagers begin to be rude? It is especially offensive and unpleasant to hear it from girls!
And there can - to be it only protective reaction, or just they on us train certain life skills: ability in time to answer, to joke successfully, and sometimes and to show sharp, evil sarcasm. Unless it will not be necessary for them in life? Very difficult to parents, of course, to listen to a stream of caustic ridiculings on a subject: “You already old and do not understand modern life!“, seasoned with causticities, tricks, laughter. Let`s be cleverer and we will allow our children a little over us to experiment (without being beyond legal, certainly). Then in difficult situations they will behave correctly, without losing at the same time prestige at friends. For example: on the offer to drink, light, use some preparations of the girl, the unwillingness to do it, the easy and easy phrase: “I did not understand what is it, I am a blonde, so far will reach me!“, translate everything for fun.
Between times (reproaches and a raspisyvaniye of future “good life“) the daughter can also prompt the well-known phrase of Scarlett O`Hara from the movie “Gone with the Wind“: “I will think of it tomorrow! “ Nevertheless it is better, than on the proposal of the young man to go to it home, the girl - the teenager will answer: “Mother does not allow me!“ That`s it: ridiculously!
Here they on us, parents and teachers, also work causticity of thought (it is a pity that not the capacity and a saturation, well and it is fine). Also the family and school into “School of malignant gossip“ of the famous classic Richard Sheridan turns. And here it is better for them not to speak about it - will be upset, teenagers so do not love classical literature!
Well and what we will do with roughness, that is with very good ability to talk scandal? It seems to me if we very much want and we will try, then we will be able to understand the children. And they should not represent from themselves those whom they are not.
And I have a scenario always one: to huff, give lecture on “About Love and Friendship“, to tell the crown phrase: “To the friends you will talk so, but not to me! “ And, certainly “to thaw“ after words of the daughter: “I love you!“ It is not pedagogic, wrong likely and. But! If someone thought up more effective options - let will share!