Whether always kindness is disinterested?
On the general representations kindness are a responsiveness on others problems. At the same time the given help has to be disinterested, otherwise it is not kindness. Whether so it?
Whether disinterested aid is real? Any given help is interpreted by
as kindness manifestation. Actually, helped. Made life of other person in something easier, and can even solved his complex problem. And it is unimportant, there were at the same time mercenary motives or not. The main thing - result. Against it there is nothing to tell. However the speech is a little about another.
At the heads of people there is a mash from any cliches. Happens that the person helped someone, and then waits for “gratitude“, sincerely believing that made a disinterested good deed. It is just necessary to be able to distinguish one from another.
My friend worked in the private medical company. The cousin appealed to it to reduce with the famous doctor in circumvention of the general administrative rules. The girlfriend did not want to ask the doctor and then to be obliged to him, but also it was inconvenient to refuse to the relative. As a result everything passed normally, the doctor gave help to the relative of the girlfriend. After a while money urgently was necessary for my friend, and she addressed that relative (who had money, thanks to the rich husband). The relative politely refused to her. My friend was so revolted that she long did not want to communicate then with her. The girlfriend was sure that the sister responded to her “kindness“ with “base ingratitude“. So in what this kindness consisted? If the girlfriend, helping the sister, counted on mutual aid, then this not disinterested good, but the transaction.
Other friend gave money under percent and sincerely considered that she is good to people.
One more acquaintance during repair in the apartment was exempted from unnecessary things. It was a pity to throw out them to it. And it represented “charity“, distributing old, semi-fragmentary curtains and doormats. All right, if it carried them, for example, in orphanage. No, its help was “address“. She imposed all this only to acquaintances, saying that she should know that things fell into “good hands“ (as elite puppies). That is it was pleasant to it from thought that curtains and doormats still “continue“ the life, and, coming to acquaintances, it would “control“ this process.
Why we need gratitude?
Incidentally I looked with
at a transfer piece on Animal channel where two men let out some animal from a cage on will. Perhaps, the animal was wounded, and these people cured it. It is remarkable that to an animal helped to survive. I always rejoice to such cases. But release of an animal was followed by words which left an unpleasant deposit. When the animal disappeared in the wood, one of rescuers told that “she looked back, and I hope that she wanted to thank it us“. I did not like these words.
Really it is absolutely impossible to make a good deed just like that, for the sake of the good? It is necessary us manifestation of gratitude to feel that we tried not for nothing. Even from an animal we wait for gratitude, that is “a moral payment“ for our works.
Well why is so necessary to all gratitude? Perhaps, we are people, in general mercenary beings? Then it is not necessary to argue hypocritically on good and unselfishness, it is better to leave these categories as ideals. And in real life it is simple to respond to requests of acquaintances, without representing virtue and mercenarily counting on “answer“. Perhaps, all in the nature mercenarily, and it is necessary to treat it quietly.