When and how to pronounce the word “no“?
As a favor … Usually so address to trouble-free people. To people for which to tell the word “no“ it is the real problem. If they tell firm and resolute “no“, will cease to love them, will cease to communicate with them, will cease to muffle them on a visit and for lunch. Such people should speak “yes“, even then, when it goes to a section their own interests and to opportunities. Psychologists and experts consider that own low self-assessment is the cornerstone of such non-failure operation, first of all. For such people the perception their surrounding people directly depends on their affirmative answer on any requests. Requests which are not always convenient for them. Also, also the education received by such people in the far childhood is the possible reason of non-failure operation. Parents put not absolutely correct stereotype of behavior to the child and did not encourage his healthy egoism. And such people for whom the word “no“ is a problem just and should think of healthy egoism. There is still a number of the reasons which try to explain our impossibility to pronounce the word “no“. Here and fear to offend, fear to hear the word “no“ on a reciprocal request, dependence on the administration. There is a lot of possible options and all of them are united by one problem - the word “no“ is not pronounced.
But sometimes in life there come such moments when nevertheless it is just necessary to say resolute “no“. When it is necessary to say the negative answer and as this it is correct to do, let`s try to understand together.
You have full authority for the word “no“ if appeal to you, the requirement about actions which go to a section with your personal plans, intentions and actions. The word “no“ can be pronounced safely when it “no“ is reasoned by your vital principles and positions. You have, as well as each person on Earth, the right for the personal opinion and for the personal perception of a situation even if this look and perception does not coincide with opinion of people around. The word “no“ will be also pertinent if you already promised earlier something to other person, and now you are asked to change the decision. You same full personality, as well as all others. You are not obliged if you do not want it, to do for others their work, to carry out others duties, to meet people, unpleasant for you, and to get into situations, inconvenient for you. You have full authority to tell “no“ if in you all to oppose to this request or a wish.
When it became already clear to us to tell the word “no“ with you. And here is how to make it resolutely and convincingly and so that “no“ sounded, as well as “no“, but not as “perhaps, I will think …“
For a start “no“ you have to be confident in the. It has to be your accurate, conscious desire to say “no“. Your fluctuations are actually very noticeable from outside and “no“ will never sound as the present “no“ if you are not confident in it.
When you pronounce refusal the word “no“, do it from the first person, using the word “Ya“. At desire will reason not with superfluous the refusal. Also your intonation, a pose and gestures will perfectly add your denying argument. Is not necessary in the refusal to pronounce words of an apology too often. It will be rather simple to say “Sorry, but is not present because …“ Own point of view does not demand constant apologies for it.
It is quite probable that your the first, second, tenth “no“ first will not be perceived seriously. It will be difficult to the people surrounding you to get used that from just ready to help person you turned into the homo sapiens. For this purpose they will need time. Do not recede from the “no“. Be consecutive in the decisions. Listen to the argument of your interlocutor if it did not overpersuade you and the request continues to go to a section with your feelings, desires, opportunities, repeat the “no“ so much how many it will be required in order that your interlocutors understood that your non-failure operation at last the end came, and you began to love and respect yourself, to appreciate the time and the life.
However you should not fall from one extreme into another and having forgotten the word “yes“ on the left and to say to the right accurate and resolute “no“. In life there are different situations, there are different circumstances and every time it is necessary to approach a situation not with conservative approach, only this way, and not differently, and with flexibility and ease. Sometimes and it is possible to pronounce the word “yes“.
Important that your word “no“ and your word “yes“ were really your opinion, your perception of a situation, but not imposed need.