Introvert: how to survive in the ekstravertny world?
the Modern world - ekstraverten. And each introvert, as well as I knows about it. And who does not know - feels. A pursuit of material benefits, the eternal haste which set the word teeth on edge - skill to communicate - activity - commitment...
And what to do to us, introverts? To people, sometimes vulnerable and closed, loving rest and silence, not having anything against fascinating communication, but in exclusively narrow circle of people and on not mediocre subjects?.
In the article I will not tell about introverts and their antipodes - extroverts, I want to designate two main difficulties with which I as the introvert, already faced, and a certain thought on achievement of more comfortable life in “it is active - the sociable world“.
1. Communication with people. From personal experience I can tell
that it is very difficult to introvert to get on with the extrovert. If communication simply formal, then the introvert with the minimum losses can sustain it, and the ekstravertny family, close acquaintances liking to chat about anything exhaust introverts emotionally so that it is felt physically (weakness, detachment, desire to hide).
And what to do to spouses - antipodes? Well present, to you - the introvert wants to read after work the book in silence, and your ekstravertny half, without having had a good long talk at work, tries to stir up you and takes offense if you do not react.
Introverts of insignificant talks do not love. But it does not mean that they are absolutely reticent, no! If the subject and the company to liking - he with pleasure and long - can long speak to the introvert about something.
In 80% of cases work means, besides direct duties, continuous social contact - the administration, colleagues, customers, and at times work are directly communication, for example, the sales manager, the telemarketing specialist. On own experience I can tell that (without “tea drinking heart-to-heart“) and the administration (as necessary) the introvert can quite take out formal communication with colleagues; but if its work assumes that “skill to communicate“ which set the teeth on edge then it is already more difficult than business … Continuous communication exhausts the introvert, exhausts all his forces, and as a result, coming home after not such tiresome in fact work, the introvert feels broken, suppressed - a squeezed orange, generally.
It is possible to tell - find to yourself a congenial employment, introvertny! Yes, there are such specialties - the writer, the editor, the artist, the accountant, at last, but if to understand, a way to the editor or the writer who is not writing to a table, and receiving decent money for the work, not such short and easy. And till this time what to do? To burn out at “sociable works“?.
The impression can be made that introverts are certain haughty touchy persons, but it absolutely not so. These are people who do not need feed from the outside, they derive strength from the inner world and are not afraid of boredom since to them always is than interesting and useful to occupy themselves. But that was what itself to feed, the introvert needs to resupply the energy constantly. He is also engaged in it, reading the book in a privacy, reflecting, drawing something, just doing everything that is pleasant to it.
So to do?. What to do to the introvert to whom often it seems that the world is adjusted to it extremely hostilely and presses the emotions, the rules and installations?
1. To develop self-confidence - it is useful for all, and the introvert - especially. So it will be able to get rid of many disorders and alarms.
2. To increase skills of communication - sometimes with a great effort, through “I do not want / I cannot“, but even if you will not be sociable at all and you it arranges, you should come into the minimum contacts. Better if you have though any idea of it. You should not force yourself, just look at this situation differently - you became here a writer, write yourself quietly, and then to the editor you go. And if you in conversation with the editor and couples of words cannot connect what then will be? Presented? Here - here, the minimum skills of communication are necessary to all, and introverts including.
3. Relaxation - you feel tired and flat-out? Day was given too sated with communication? Turn on the pleasant music, turn off light, and it is better to light candles or an aromalampa, accept a convenient pose and minutes 20 have just a rest … Do not think of anything, do not analyze, have simply a rest .
4. Introverts are most often the people who are esthetically adjusted to themselves and to life do not miss it in yourself. Develop the sensuality, samorazvivaytes, you treat yourself with love and care. And do not consider yourself wrong at all! Of course, for society you can be strange and unclear, but it means that you not such as everything that you special, you understand yourself, the nature also are respectful to yourself.
The most important that I want to tell all introverts: do not break the nature for any public installations at all. Just you learn to be plastic, flexible in life, but the essence, “stone“, do not break and do not allow to break to somebody. Us, introverts it is, not enough, but in it our highlight - we are special copies. Be yourself!