The colleague - my enemy or the friend?
the Conflicts in the business sphere happen, and is frequent. Side by side with strangers on 8 hours a day is a test... But I want to talk not about the reasons of contradictions of opinions, and how not to lead labor relations up a blind alley when an exit one - the notice of resignation.
In that case when between participants of conversation there is at least no elementary aspiration to make a step towards each other, the conflict can arise absolutely unexpectedly and almost from scratch. Therefore you remember that it is much more pleasant and easier to criticize the opponent, than to listen to his opinion. Bite to yourself tongue, having felt desire to start immediately reasoning and to explain “unreasonable“ as everything has to be actually. A step, patience and scrupulousness in questions of business etiquette - here the main virtues which should be cultivated in themselves on service.
Try to understand interests of the opponent. Very often own negative emotions dim to us eyes, and the speech of the partner is heard through a prism of embitternment and notorious unwillingness to agree with him. In that case try to keep cool and try to put yourself to the place of other person.
As it will seem surprising, but we also sometimes irritate people with whom we communicate. See to yourself: can be, you like to stand during conversation too close to the interlocutor or to collapse in a chair, having thrown legs on a table? Perhaps, it is habitual to you to use a toothpick, fixedly looking to the colleague in eyes or to gnaw a ball pen? The drumbeat fingers on a table, as well as clicking by them, a manernichaniye - for example when phrases in a foreign language are significantly said, too can incite the interlocutor against you. The habit to interrupt the colleague (because, in your opinion, already everything is clear), to pat him shoulder, and also to take liberties, teach, criticize and to pass to patronizing tone also leads to the conflicts. If you tightened
in the conflict, the main thing in a similar situation - to choose the correct style of behavior. Psychologists allocate five standard strategy - choose to liking, the main thing - to be defined that as a result is required to be received.
Adaptation . In this case the person changes the position and seeks to smooth contradictions to the detriment of the personal interests. It is used when it is much more important to person to keep cordial relations with the partner, than to argue furiously the correctness.
Compromise . On bowls of scales arguments, identical on the importance, on both sides are put. When makeshift of all arranges, and it is favorable to parties to get though something, than to lose everything.
Cooperation . This strategy is used when the parties actively seek to develop the uniform decision satisfying both those, and others. Usually in it there is a requirement when the compromise is impossible, but it is necessary to reach a consensus. It is easier to make it if you have with the opponent close and long relations.
Ignoring . It is reasonable to use similar method when it is required to keep calm, not “to lose face“, to soberly estimate all pros and cons. The head can quite ignore the conflict if he considers that subordinates can cope with it independently. It is useful not to pay attention to a problem if its discussion only adds fuel to the fire, and will not help business.
Rivalry . It is meant as open fight for the interests, upholding of the position. It is pertinent in behavior of the chief when he is confident, for example, that his subordinates accept authoritative management style that it has enough powers for removal of a final and irrevocable verdict.
The trouble-maker in collective . Quite often in labor collectives people who use “the power pressure“ meet to provoke the conflict. Their main receptions of are as follows:
collecting the compromising materials on the head further to use it as a mine of the slowed-down action;
continuous stay at work with the offended look and eternal complaints that the boss of all offends and oppresses;
use of any trifle as reason for discontent;
colliding by foreheads of collective and chief: “All of you are such competent experts, only he does not notice one it and does not appreciate“;
recruitment of dissatisfied employees for break-in around opposition. to
It is clear that with the trouble-maker it is necessary to do something. At first it is necessary to recognize existence of the instigator of the conflicts among you. And then will not pay most usefully attention to it and not to give in on provocation. Do not allow it to involve you in a series of small working quarrels which will bring you glory of the fan of hostile collisions and it is tightened to the bog of the all-consuming conflict. If the trouble-maker continues attempts to win round you, giving allegedly to one to him famous information on you, remember that publicity - your first defender. Any power pressure is some kind of blackmail. And the best means of fight against the blackmailer - to publish “compromising evidence“ most.
It is known that in the conflict almost there are never winners. Here also think before being got involved in quarrel whether such Pyrrhic victory is necessary to you.