How to get rid of problems?
of the Problem, problems … Big and small. They are always with us. Sometimes them so many that it seems that the whole world against you. There are also periods of relative calm when easy cloudlets only slightly break vital idyll.
As often there is a wish to disappear from the problems where - nibud far away. But hardly it will turn out even if we will choose other end of Earth.
We often treat a problem, as something third-party: “Here I, and here my problem“. Happens and so: “There are my problems, and here I“. Until in our head there is such division, problems remain.
It is possible to take offense at life, to be angry, fight with them. And it is possible to recognize that they are. And not where - nibud nearby, and in ourselves. At times it is impossible to agree with it:
- How so? Stole money from me!
- changed Me!
- I was deceived!
- I was offended!
- Why a problem - in me?
In some measure we are always reflection of what happens to us. Instead of a storm of emotions ask yourself the following questions:
- Why the problem arose in my life?
- What it gives me?
- What I can make for its decision?
- What I cannot make?
To receive answers to the first two questions very important. If you do not think of it, then the lesson which life gave you is not passed. It is possible therefore some people constantly “attract“ troubles. Complaining of injustice, they do not even notice that life “causes them to a board“ again and again and “puts the two“ for not learned lessons.
Take the incident for granted. Think what now depends on you? Also make it! And then “release“ thoughts of a problem. Our reality all the time changes. If later any time you understand what was made not by all, act! And then provide to events to go under the own steam. Over time the problem either will be resolved, or will stop being it.
Life always meets requirements of optimists! You should not “exhaust“ a problem deep into yourself. It - “a mine of the slowed-down action“. If there are not enough own resources, primitepomoshch friends or experts. But do not shift to them its decision. People will never make what depends only on you.
Of course, there are things which are not subject to you. But, as one of rules NLP says: “The Universe - the friendly environment“. Provide also to it the part of work.
Ourselves give to any problem power feed, and from own reserves. And that it expands, and our forces run low - only our merit. All work happens only in our head. So we can easily make “of a fly of an elephant“ or arrive differently.
For example, “to include curiosity“: to see some hints, to think what useful can be taken. To feel the researcher. Such pragmatic approach very much helps.
It is possible to arrive “exactly the opposite“: to cease to show interest in a problem. As where interest - there energy is also directed. Without your attention the problem can die away.
The famous psychotherapist Milton Eriksson sometimes used similar reception. Somehow mother of the teenager who had all person in juvenile spots addressed it. He advised it to go with him to a ski resort, but to make so that during all the time that they will be there, the teenager never looked in a mirror. Two weeks later “the result was available“ and on a face too!
our personal liberty is that we can learn to experience emotions necessary to us and states and to be exempted from the fears living in us, hatred, offenses and restrictions. And it is one more way to getting rid of problems.
It is not so simple, but it is quite possible. We are able to operate emotions. Is able to receive and analyze “feedback“ from the world. It is only a question of sensibleness and continuous training. Over time our skill will pass into the area unconscious, and so many efforts will not be required any more.
There are two ways: in “lag“ in a problem - and in its decision. Our degree of freedom - in the choice of the movement in this or that party.
We often act on habitual templates. Therefore one acquire problems as “snowball“, considering the world as “the place of a survival and big difficulties“. And others, even at serious tests, revive all the time, “as a bird the Phoenix from ashes“. They turn all the vital difficulties into invaluable experience and use to themselves for the good.
Understanding of on what way you dvizhtsya, very important step for disposal of problems.
Someone considers that its problems will be resolved if in his life there is darling. But it - “escape from reality“ and not the best way of a rearrangement of the tasks on other person. Next illusion and next disappointments … Often we consider that our problems will disappear if we have money (the car, housing, good work). Life proves other.
We cannot receive happiness from the outside, yet “we will not open“ it in ourselves. Perhaps therefore in many countries with a high standard of living there are a lot of cases of depressions.
We often do not even reflect what actually makes us happy? And it turns out that it is the simplest things. Sometimes it is quiet summer evening, a breath of fresh air after hospital walls, the tea which is carefully prepared by darling, the ray of sunlight sliding on a cheek, joyful eyes of the child or slow conversation in a circle of friends.
We feel happy when we live in a consent with ourselves and with gratitude we accept life in all its manifestations. And then we test a resonance with the world. We do not think of a question any more: “How to get rid of problems?“ We see in them only hints of the Universe.