In what force of associations and dissotsiation? A secret of happiness
Imagine red Ferrari. Powerful, sports, growling. What comes to your mind when you imagine this car? It rushes by at great speed or shines gloss in prestigious car showroom.
And maybe, the scarlet handsome quickly accelerates from the intersection, deafening all street? Everything that you imagine, it is possible to call dissociation. It is a situation or the phenomenon which occurs somewhere nearby, and you do not take part in it. You as if take a detached view of everything. You are an observer. This car is not associated directly with you.
Now imagine something with your direct participation. For example, your boss dismisses you. It is connected with you directly. And, imagining this picture, you imagine the feelings, emotions, experiences at once. You are a participant of action. You not sideways and not nearby. It happens directly to you. Dismiss you. You associate yourself with the taking place event. It is called association.
And if you want to feel happy the person, you need to know when to associate itself with the taking place events, and when there is no. And to understand, you do it or not, it is very simple: it is worth looking at your emotions only.
When you worry, actively react - you associate. People who go by cars associate themselves with traffic jams, checkup or traffic police. People who have no car - are not present. In good and positive situations you have to associate yourself with the taking place events. You have to “enter the picture“. Well and positively to you. In undesirable and negative events it is necessary “to get out of the situation“. To become the observer. To take a detached view of a situation and not to attach it significance, not to give vent to emotions.
People who are very happy in life completely associate themselves with all good. They where it is good. If there is something bad, these people do not associate themselves with such events. They move away. Do not attach it significance. Do not express emotions, try not to test them.
People who in are depressions and a negative associate themselves with negative events. They twist a negative in the head. It is simple, isn`t it?
Let`s review an example as it is possible to apply it in the life. Let`s take the relations, the most important and integral element of full-fledged and happy life. There is nothing more simply, than to take and fall in love with other person. To fall in love with someone, you need to associate yourself with other person completely. And to dissociate itself (that is to abstract) from everything that in it upsets you. Check! Remember how it was with you!
You do not divide everything on “it in you it is pleasant to me“ and “and this is not pleasant“. When you fall in love, you just feel all that good that you see. You live in those fine moments which to you are given by your darling.
And if you want to stop loving, it is not less simple to make it. Just associate yourself with all negative or irritable. “Aha, again did not wash away a toilet bowl“, “Did not prepare for me to eat again“, “When you at last will take out garbage“...
Live these feelings, endure it. You are in it. Associate yourself with it. Also dissociate yourself from all that connects you together. Think of something special when you together.
Will not pass also several weeks as you stop loving irrevocably.