Why it is so difficult to find a common language with the teenager?
Stopped being the child, and the adult did not become yet - quite so it is possible to tell about the teenager. At this time the person changes in the eyes, and not all parents are ready to accept these changes. And during this period relatives need to make everything not to lose touch with the child.
The teenage period begins at all differently: at someone earlier, at someone later. Parents have to notice these changes the first and begin to behave with the child in a different way. It is impossible to ignore age changes - otherwise negative consequences will not keep themselves waiting. It is necessary to show a lot of patience as teenagers sometimes and cannot understand what they want.
It is the most difficult to have this time to parents who got used to sponsor and control the child excessively. Such education not only promotes development of many complexes, but also can pour out in a powerful protest. The discontent of the teenager often arises from - for the fact that his life and views are actually poorly interesting to parents. In authoritative families children try to escape from - under guardianship, protesting sometimes by very dangerous methods. If to try to suppress will of the child, as before, it will lead that to heavier consequences.
Hardly it is necessary also those parents who got used to indulge the child and almost everything to allow it. It is a typical case when the lack of attention is compensated by toys and money. Usually children in such families early mature, are very independent and even at teenage age do not cause special problems to parents. But it becomes frequent the child absolutely uncontrollable, exhausting parents the overestimated inquiries and unreasonable whims. In this case relatives have to find surely time for the child because nothing material can replace love, understanding and confidential communication.
The teenager needs to see that he is liked that are interested in it, and to be felt that it is necessary to parents always, even despite those changes which happen to it. At this time it is worth communicating especially intensively. Having made once a month attempt to talk, parents will achieve nothing - most likely, the teenager will not go for contact and will even more become isolated.
At the same time communication cannot be imposed. It is not necessary to try to force it to be frank, and on the contrary, it is better to tell more it about the affairs, to consult on it, to explain him the behavior. Seeing genuine sincerity, he most likely will want to answer the same. Also it is just necessary to be interested in his hobbies is an excellent opportunity for joint pastime.
The teenager needs more freedom, than to the child, but it is necessary delicately to let it know that has to bear responsibility for the acts and decisions of people. Many teenagers are not ready to be responsible for the actions, maybe, because parents did not talk to them about it in time.
Active recreation all family or other joint occupation will help to approach the teenager. No matter, what to do, the main thing - to spend time together. It is possible to organize a small party for the child`s friends, without imposing at the same time the society and without subjecting action to careful control.
The world of the maturing person is unclear and strange, but it is necessary to try to penetrate into his problems. The main thing - not to push away the changed child not to lose it forever.