Lady perfection?! Or how courageous Gods help? Part 1
to All of us since the childhood is familiar to
to be ideal in everything. to be the best in everything. always to achieve the received result. to be ahead of all. And already exclamations of peers and teachers are heard behind - it is ideal! Not the girl, and dream. Any of us in a class had such girl - dream.
That it? Projection of future ideal woman or...?
Benign can find the reflection in “the honors pupil`s syndrome“. Let`s dwell.
At school I had a schoolmate. Katya. Katya was a girl from very intelligent family. Since the early childhood Katya studied musical art, attended classes in a choreographic circle, cross stitched the shaking cloths in the evenings. At lessons Katya knew everything, answered accurately and distinctly, always allowed all to write off, in a case Katya always had spare handles. Never swore at anybody, shared cookies on changes. Naturally, did not smoke and did not sing a song in the yard to the guitar with boys while we tried the first Malboro in the life, ran on discos, and with surprise listened to the overstraining youthful voices to the guitar which tried to rehash V. Tsoi or Petliura and who are more courageous and more raunchy - Mikhail Kruga. We had fun, and in the Katiny window the desk lamp always burned - Rolling did the next occupation with all diligence inherent in it. Naturally, the school was graduated by her with a gold medal, entered the university chosen by her parents. Here our ways dispersed, but in a consequence we learned that Katina was not died - the husband the terrible bore who was a son of the colleague of the Katiny father, the campaign in a pothouse on Fridays and moaning about difficult life of “squirrel in a cage“ was the only entertainment of the husband, at work it did not reach a high position, and her girlfriends did not put it in anything, and children do not need comments... And other children from a class who were “tear off and throw out“ somehow were beaten out in people, have houses, prestigious works and beauties of wives which not all were diligent schoolgirls from intelligent families.
So where it is a side between good and bad? And what it is good and what it - bad?
These questions rhetorical, I will not dare to give an assessment and the characteristic, but it is possible to consider shades.
For Katin of parents was the main thing - that the daughter brought only victories. It had to be the best in everything! And here a keyword - has to. Let`s remember once and for all - we to nobody have to nothing and, first of all, to ourselves, besides how to be happy! Katya went on the way, chosen as her in absentia. She did not study herself, she did not provobat, she was not mistaken, she did not accumulate experience. Parents fenced the daughter from these efforts, as a result she could not resist to vital circumstances. She lived according to the list which was in advance written to it, but only here parents could not provide that the novel of life of “the good girl“ written by them could become in a moment the drama.
U of any of us was the list, and maybe now is “That we have to make“ - to grow thin by April, to graduate from the university perfectly, to find prestigious work instantly, marry / marries to 25, to continue a sort and to live a strong family till an old age. And as soon as we begin to feel deviations from this internal schedule - the schedule we are covered by panic. But it is impossible to make the plan for life! It flows, it changes - it is the river! Draw the scheme of the river and its features today, in a couple of years it will be unacceptable - because the river constantly changes a current. And life - it cannot give in to the scheme, to the plan is not a lesson of geometry or drawing, it is a canvas on which events are drawn and details are finished drawing....
But a question - we finish drawing them or to us already planned the scheme? Whose dream we will become? are young, very young Predstavte:va`s
. You are given 2 cards. On one you draw the dreams, desires, imaginations and in what you really want to be engaged in life, and on another you receive drawing of parents, teachers, friends and td. Also you put both cards in two pockets. Also you begin the way. And here to you 40! Crisis of middle age... all speak to you unanimously - members of household, psychologists, friends. You look back - everything it seems went as it is necessary as was planned, but there is no happiness inside and harmonies but only a regret. And suddenly you remember about cards. You get left - here it everything that happens to you... Also you remember about right... - blood begins to rage, and heart clenches.
you were the romantic, sang songs to the guitar, wrote verses, played soccer, and now every day you are surrounded by a pile of documents and reports, house except a dinner and a tired face of the wife waits for nothing, on days off for all as at all. Unless you dreamed of it, aspired to it?
Wanted to travel, visit all globe in the cheerful company, and were only in several resorts and that incidentally there got... What became with that or that pure soul which is torn to freedom. it was sphered. IN TOTAL. All died away. With the wife or the husband of intimate relationship was not already few years. where that passion? And here women of easy virtue, alcohol, drugs are used... But it does not return passion. And it is unsurprising! Because the source of love, happiness, good, beauty - you is. Only having returned passion to life in itself, it is possible to begin to live!!!!! Crisis. no! It is a change!! Transformation.
Crisis (other - Greek κ ρ ί σ ι ς - the decision, a turning point) - revolution, is time a transition state, a change, a state at which the existing means of achievement of the objectives become inadequate therefore there are unpredictable situations and problems.
Standards are put, habits are developed. and it is very terrible to change all. And suddenly it will not turn out, and suddenly it not that, it will pass, just the period difficult. You can deceive all around, but only do not deceive yourself! Present that you live the last year. And then think of how much you did not make... Only the strongest will find forces everything to change and will not regret! Courageous Gods help!
Yes, will be difficult to learn itself anew, to study, dig in itself, but it is worth it. Do not lose pleasure to lead life which was wanted by you, to lead passionate life - to love life! !! You will not be left one, you will be helped, to give signs, and you will come there where so wanted to come, being still “not a squirrel in a cage“. The child, when learns to go, he is helped - do not laugh at him.
But if you leave everything as it is, life can give you already inducing calls. which can break you or bring on the contrary there where you are fated to be, but already absolutely other person.
we Will return to perfection. What is it?
Perfection - a condition of absolute quality or advantage someone or something. In the simplified expression, perfection is something the best.
goes concept of perfectionism Nearby.
Perfectionism - in psychology, belief that best result it is possible (or it is necessary) to reach. In a pathological form - belief that the imperfect result of work is unacceptable. Can be both the “normal“ characteristic of the personality, and a neurotic mental deviation.
We considered concept of the “perfection“ imposed by us. And what if it is internal requirement of an organism? Constantly there is a wish to develop and to develop multilaterally, passing the way adequately and to find wisdom, to become the best person who you can only become! That if passion, love, kindness, sincerity, honesty, happiness - All is revealed. that goes down grace and to live becomes in pleasure. Be dream for yourself!!!
P. S. I have an unpretentious taste - to me quite enough best! (O. Wilde)
Work on yourself, develop, strive for your perfection, perfection of your soul!
Who told that it does not exist? You heard this voice?!