Illness, trauma, disability. How to learn to live anew?
Trouble come, without asking. A serious illness, a trauma - how to live further? Where to take forces on fight? How to learn to live anew? Answers to all these questions are not put in us since the birth, the person should most look for a way to rescue. To the rescue. Overcoming takes place step by step...
The first stage - rejection, or otherwise - denial of the incident. the Person does not trust, and it is rather, does not want to believe the present. Lives past. Reminiscence - it is constant with it. In talk speaks to a thicket about former time as if nothing occurred.
Very important at this stage not to “go too far“ in care of the patient. Close people often make this mistake. The care has to be dosed. Only in necessary. Physically. Even it is better for moral aspect of a problem to place bigger emphasis.
Why I am sure of correctness of the judgments? What right I have to give advice? In the first and last turn because itself passed through it. I consider the most invaluable experience - it is the experience gained personally by you.
The matter is that, showing excessive care, relatives, relatives deprive of the patient of an opportunity to make decisions independently, do not leave an option. Accustom him to thought of helplessness. Not for nothing speak: “Good intentions …“
there Comes the second stage, the heaviest and long. The person begins to understand all tragedy of a situation. tragedy, differently, the person loses suddenly in any way an opportunity to live fully. Loses itself as the full member of healthy society, many lose a family. Awareness of helplessness leads to constant or periodic thoughts of a suicide. For the patient there comes the period of depressions. Any, carelessly told word irritates.
Here presence is very important. No, it is not obligatory to be with the patient 24 hours a day, it is simple to participate in his life. For a minute not to allow to doubt itself, not to allow loneliness in his heart.
How to achieve it? It is not necessary to be sorry and suffer from a row. Try to inspire in the patient his necessity gradually. To ask council, to share the affairs and news. As far as possible to occupy it with something practical!
The third stage - understanding, acceptance of. This that turning point when it becomes clear, chances of “new life“ are how big.
The person accepts the state, the illness. The understanding has to come - life changed and to find in it the place - a task number one. This life with the difficulties, with an illness, with drugs etc. Other life.
The fourth stage - search. Search of. at this stage of people all reached can “stumble“ and destroy. To find the place in society, again to find sense. There has to be an accurate purpose. The aspiration and achievement of an objective are small victories. Small because it is better to set the small purposes at the beginning. That case, when to anything haste. Everything will be. Not at once. It is necessary to show patience only.
Further people “acquires“ new acquaintances, interests. There is an incentive and desire to help others. It is a victory! A victory over by itself.
Good luck to you and good health!