Parents and children. Whether is at teenagers of a problem?
Many modern teenagers meet a lack of attention of the parents recently. Mothers and fathers are very engaged at work, come home tired and angry. And to them it is uninteresting at all what place in school competitions was taken by their beloved son, and especially they are not adjusted to listen about indifference of the loveliest and good boy at school with whom already as several months their daughter is in love. What to do to children? How to correct a situation to parents. we Will begin
with the childhood. Misunderstanding and some distance between parents and their children arises not at once. Since the birth parents care and engaged with the children: teach them to go, speak, to read, write. And life, that which is actually children begin to learn already at school. But there is this knowledge of life not from parents, and from society to which the child gets. In this society everything absolutely different, all have a different education, different opinions and views which in many respects coincide with parental.
But in initial classes children are still very dependent on the mothers and fathers, ask permissions before to make something. And parental nervousness and fear for the kids it is still very high. But the child matures. He does not report every day for the estimates any more, does not tell about each word of each schoolmate, does not ask permission, itself knows how to it to arrive in this or that situation. Now the teenager who shouted in a carriage until recently and went to a pot comes home, eats and leaves. Goes to the room, to friends, to walk alone, to do homework or to drink beer behind garages - it is unknown to parents.
U them the problems. Constantly catastrophically there is not enough money. They need to be taken somewhere that to dress all and to put, feed, pay for the apartment, phone, the Internet, to buy gifts for holidays which, such feeling, every week. Moreover with the husband / wife again dissonance. And at work a full blockage. Generally, in the head one problems and cares, affairs and plans, anything, only not children. Adults quite often forget to allow thought of where now there is their child and what he is engaged in. “The kid grew up. I already taught him to everything to what could, I already brought up him, now he can take care of himself“, - here all also begins with these thoughts.
A at the child is constant in the head a thought about what parents about it forgot. Eternal questions and requests come to an end advising something silence, the words “I am busy“ or something like that. Just adults think that children have no problems. Of course, what they can have problems if we give everything to them: both money for journey, and clothes, also I go, both the computer, and phone of a latest model. Certainly, parents do not forget that they have a maturing child, but whether they remember that the child matures not only externally, but also internally?
A at teenagers the same problems. They too sometimes lack money for purchase of a disk with the favourite movie or other desired purchase, and it is inconvenient to ask from parents. They quite often have disagreements and the conflicts with schoolmates, teachers, friends. And what to talk business warm? And in general, at teenagers there are so much different problems and questions on which there is no answer therefore it is so important to them to ask for someone council. And they follow council to parents. Also it happens, unfortunately, so that beloved mother or the father treated a question of the child a little not as it could be expected, or at all in any way. Here then at the teenager in general the desire something vanishes to ask parents.
Here then the thread connecting the parent and the child breaks. The teenager is afraid to tell in general something to parents, being afraid of the wrong understanding, inadequate reaction, quarrel or simple indifference to a problem. Children cease to trust the parents. And this most terrible! When between the parent and the child the trust vanishes, after understanding of the mistake it is necessary to spend a lot of time for restoration of the former relations. What
conclusion? Children need to gather and entrust the parents the soul, the thoughts, the points of view, the problems, to ask all interesting questions. If parents persistently do not want to be in contact, then it is necessary just to talk. And parents need to remember themselves in youth. They would like to appear in the same situation? I think, no. Parental wisdom and vital experience should not sit inside, they have to go for the good to people, in our case - to children, own, favourite and unique. To quarrel and row - at all not option, it is necessary to treat with understanding to the children, to rise to the place of children, to give them a wise advice, not to allow to drown in this ocean of adulthood. I do not say
Ya that such problems are present at each family, but they meet quite often. From - for misunderstandings and absence of parents during this difficult period of life I promote development of isolation of the child. From there are addicts, alcoholics who are simply lost in life people, not having an opportunity somewhere to break through. Everything goes from a family. Therefore parents should reflect and whether time suffices and attention they give to the child?