Rus Articles Journal

The Fenteziyny fighter “Conan is the barbarian“. How legends degenerate?

Are three ways to talk about new work of Markus Nispel. The first and the most obvious - to compare its opus to John Milius`s original of 1982. Thereby, thanks to which career of “Iron Arney“ went uphill.

The way not absolutely honest because the present generation that picture in the majority did not look and comparisons will not estimate. And to throw on one scales of Jason Momoa with Schwarzenegger as decently how to take away lollipop from the child.

The second and more humane option - to address the primary source, Robert I. Howard`s books by which Nispel was allegedly inspired. Reading matter, frankly speaking, specific, on the big fan. From the book in the movie unless the general imperceptible aura was lit and the atmosphere of stupid violence. Conan - a figure fictional, and Howard, owing to the fact that died at the blossoming age 76 years ago will already not stand ups for copyright therefore it is possible to decline his characters somehow and in any foreshortening.

The third way is represented to me the most logical - to apprehend new “Conan - the barbarian“ as independent work. And then it is not necessary to be spat sadly after the leaving credits. There is no sense to lament over pozhulkany decades in the way of the great barbarous soldier. On the roll there is only Momoa, his wooden sword, beautiful computer landscapes of Bulgaria and the trail of blood which is trying to keep step with it for nearly two hours of screen time.

… When Conan was small with the curly head, he esteemed the father, carried to it scalps of the murdered forest robbers and dreamed to become sometime the cool barbarian and the leader of the tribe. The father who found the son from a womb of the dying mother in the heat of fight cherishes dreams of the worthy successor too. It even shaped to Conan a ball, but does not give yet that that inadvertently was not cut.

And then angry people with curve sabers will come to the village, pozhnut yurtas, will rape women and will leave the young barbarian in proud loneliness to howl on the Moon. The boy already was wildish, and left to the mercy of fate, absolutely went astray. An arbitrariness became its credo. Twenty years later he fries port maids, creates justice with friends - pirates and secretly dreams that the destiny reduced it on a narrow path with the nasty enemy that killed his father.

Sudbinushka did not keep itself waiting. The enemy zamateret, got army and the strengthened hut. Halar Zim known as “Death angel“ travels around vicinities in the overland ship, in search of the maiden - the beauty that it is necessary the distant relative to deceased sorcerers long ago. It has a mask fantastic which he hopes to restore to life the spouse - the witch and to become the first among equal. But the girl that to our Conan will attract and that was required to the barbarian, it is possible to take away only through his calm corpse. Here also old opponents in casemates stone will meet to measure between themselves advantages different and to solve - the further to live, and a coma and spatenk it is time … Is formal

that new that old “Conan - the barbarian“ - any the screen version. Nothing the general with a plot of books, okromya the main character, they have. And if to consider that after Howard adventures of the character corresponded in several tens works of the most different authors (from Lina Carter to Poul Anderson and Steve Perry), then to look for interrelations with a literary basis, at least, silly. Officially Markus Nispel removed the version of adventures of the famous soldier which does not have any relation to John Milius`s picture “Conan there is a barbarian“ (1982), to the TV series of 1997 of the same name with Ralf Moeller`s participation. In other words, that wanted, created.

Nispel beginning career in 90 - x in shootings of music videos for Mylene Farmer, in general is famous for a habit to select crumbs from others table. It it reanimated in zero “The Texas slaughter by the chiansaw“ and “Friday, 13 - e“. And, by the way, already dealt with fenteziyny heroes in the tape “Pathfinder“ (2007) which badly failed in hire. In general it is unclear how producers, being in senses, entrusted the German statement of “Conan“ for 90 million evergreen presidents, remembering pejorative financial results of “Pathfinder“. Probably, the Russian “perhaps“ interfered. Or German “probably“.

Anticipating aroma of rotten tomatoes, I will note that the serial actor Jason Momoa coped with image of Conan at all not worse than Arnold. At least, for it it is the same role through passage in an epic chukalov, as well as in Schwarzenegger`s career. Yes, the invoice is more liquid. Yes, charisma to a poslabzha. But the newest technologies of operator art, computer special effects and a recognizable brand work at Momoa`s party. A sin in such company not to look the dandy.

It is accepted to speak about dead persons or it is good, or nothing therefore we will especially not abuse a plot of the movie. It is a shame to man when he is down to hit. The movie was scripted in three hands, and, apparently, all of them were curves as sabers Halar Zima. And if the main idea which authors skommunizdit at Howard it is possible to forgive for predictability and straightforwardness, then the set of fine details needs to be traced forever in their summary.

Here also absolutely idiotic collage with the barge haulers pulling the ship by land and the final act of sacrifice of the beautiful maiden enters. And you wait that Stephen Lang who is got up in a dried octopus will shout by a bad voice “Kalima!“ will also pull out heart at unfortunate Tamara. About noble pirates and Rose Makgoun who is got up in a suit of the angry clown with claws Freddie Kruger and there is no wish to remember. Generally, someone`s ears from everywhere stick out. In hope that the viewer already to the middle of the movie or will get up and will leave, or will fall asleep and similar nuances in memory will not detain.

In general if to exclude absolutely excess pirates and a sad physiognomy Rachael Nichols (Tamara), then Nispel`s picture will quite fit for one-time viewing in the company of alcohol-containing liquid. Nichols - a scandalous miskasting and the worst that could be imagined as the fighting girlfriend of Conan. But on its background Momoa looked even more more beautiful and is more curly-headed. And his words “Hey, the Woman, to Me!“ cause only silent approval. Never you know where you will find where you will lose.

The movie slogan unambiguously says that “The legend revives“. I do not know what at whom after viewing revived, but it is obviously time for Markus Nispel to come back to Mylene Farmer.