Man and woman: how the family is formed?
So the world is arranged that our likes and dislikes are defined by biological compatibility. It is rather simple to explain it: each organism is constructed on the five-element scheme of interaction of bodies and systems and in itself is not balanced - always there is some overload.
And so if two organisms, each of which by calculation has pathogenic loading (a problem with health), mutually each other sympathize, the norm, and full norm on all bodies and systems in common turns out. That is, if two individuals in love in itself are sick, then together they mutually compensate certain defects, and their children are absolutely healthy. It can be considered as one of miracles of joint life.
And so, the man and the woman form couple according to the scheme of the Yin - Yang - black and white, and here children of couples do not form any more because they “color“ - there balance according to the scheme Red - Blue - Green. A literal conclusion is simple: if in a family one child, he is not compensated - two others therefore biologically it will be compensated by the father with mother are not enough. From here both loading, and complexity in education. The child worries, requires to himself special attention, and actually everything is very simple - he biologically dekompensirovan.
The second child improves a situation - is with whom to work, his attention will be directed generally to the brother (sister). But it leads to the fact that in families where two children, between children develop the difficult relations: small “clings“ the senior, the senior of younger “drives“. Interaction of this sort develops at the subconscious level and pours out in a constant showdown. In this case children require attention from parents too, but now concerning clarification of their relations.
The third child introduces full balance of a family, and children are engaged “with themselves“ - they have a steady collective in which constant vigilance of parents is not so obligatory. Certainly, it requires attention and love too, but they do not need “biological feed“ any more. Further increase in number of children essentially does not change a situation, situation becomes even more balanced, but there is no that effect - transition to stability - any more as it is reached.
At biological formation of a family there is one more moment which often should be investigated, - system of biological interrelation. We considered a situation at which mother with the father compensate - totally give biological norm, but it happens not always. If mother with the father dekompensirovana, and is always tendency to certain diseases, the first child tries to normalize this situation.
As a rule, this problem is solved already by the first child, in this case biological compensation arises “for three“ - mother, the father, the child. And psychologically it will be expressed that the child very actively joins in the relations between the father and mother, and at emergence in the father with mother of intensity in the relations (by the way, the simplest consequence of a biological decompensation - emergence of intensity in the personal relations for no reason at all) he will try to settle somehow these relations, being a peculiar negotiator, and the farther, the it is more.
In - the first, it is very load function as the child needs own children`s private life, and not so incessant care of the father with mother. By the way, such situation can arise very much early, simply it will be expressed differently: in three years the child can poor-mouth, roll up a hysterics, making a protest to the abnormal personal relations of the father with mother. Also there are cases when in five years the child quite consciously begins to support one of parents.
This biological binding passes into a binding psychological which usual consequence the fact that further when the child grows up, it will be very difficult for it to begin private life as emotionally it will be very actively connected with the father or mother is.
Such situation rather often arises at spouses when instead of being engaged in private life, to make personal plans, they actively solve problems of own parents that gradually easily leads to family disorder as they have not a new family education, but “on-stage performance group“ according to the solution of problems of parents. As this situation meets quite often, three children can help with its stabilization, forming stable psychological collective - a kernel of family life.
Here approximately and all on formation of a family. It is clear, what this business not so simple, is demanded by many psychological efforts, dobra and attention.
As all people want to be “good“, it is always pleasant to think that we such, and accumulation of a negative emotional background is determined by any problems with health by the scheme - better to be rich and cheerful, than to the poor and patients.