Why we are not loved? One of one thousand reasons
we Will take a standard situation: Masha adores Vasya, tries to pay his attention to herself, and Vasya persistently does not wish to reciprocate.
Masha suffers silently or unburdens the heart to girlfriends, in especially started cases - is wrapped in a plaid, sits down on a window sill, is sad “smokes and Vasya thinks of It“, and... yes, thinks of it too.
Approximately following: “As it got to be imposed with the love“.
In this case it is accepted to empathize unfortunate Masha. But if we get up to the place of Vasya, what we will see? From it something is wanted. And not just there a shelf want to beat or help with work - from it the biggest what the human soul is only capable of.
And to which of us it is pleasant when from us something is wanted? Perhaps, the fact that attention those to whom we are cold and vice versa, it is caused not only appeal of an inaccessible target pay to us, but also the fact that the one who does not love us also wants nothing from us ? Thereby allowing to make out its best qualities without hindrances and irritation.
I saw hundreds of requests on the Internet on subjects it seems “Why he does not call me?“. Also did not find among them any where the girl would try to get up to the place of this villain who does not call and does not write her.
Perhaps, without its presence his life is only more comfortable? But, as a rule, the unwillingness to recognize the sad truth or pride does not allow our above-mentioned Masha to recognize this simple thought. And she continues to want love, attention, caress, without reflecting and what she can give? More precisely and whether what it can give is necessary for the person?
It is useless to care touchingly for the person about whom in the childhood “perezabotitsya“, and now similar manifestations bring him to white heat. It is useless to try to strike an aseksual with the erotic abilities. The obvious street mugger - knowledge of philosophical subtleties. Well, it in case you love street muggers.
Unfortunately, sometimes those our advantages which are of value for ourselves are not deserving attention for object of our feelings. But we persistently do not notice it.
Love which is so often confused to true love in general often obscures a brain. And what love? According to the well-known quote she “does not look for the“, she is unselfish. Darling exists, to him it is good - and you are happy. But it is ideal option to which it is not always possible to come. Not always it is possible - but it is worth trying always. And, maybe, if without you it is better, than with you, you as the loving person will get up to the place of object of the attention and will relieve it of the presence?
For a while. That has a rest. And for “rest time“ it is possible and to reconsider strategy of the behavior. For example, from amount of the paid attention to pass to quality. One pleasant surprise (if you are sure that it will leave really pleasant), than 100500 same calls is better. It is better to surprise suddenly with the new pleasant properties, than again and again to loom before eyes of the person in that image which already became boring to it fiercely.
But this medal has also a reverse side. Happens, the person tries very much, changes, pleases, tries not to bother on trifles... And as a result of anything. Cold.
In this case it is senseless to ask the question “Why I Am Not Loved?“ because in it there is no your fault. It is simple how you were good, without you it is really better for this specific person.
And than quicker you to yourself admit it, that it will be simpler.