How to improve the relations in collective? To us there arrived the psychologist of
Director of our advertizing agency decided to rally employees in one team and invited in office the skilled psychologist Marya Sergeyevna from “The center of rendering psychological assistance to office workers“. That for a start distributed all tests and ordered to fill in them till a lunch.
Decisions of the management at us are not discussed therefore I, having postponed writing of the concept of an advertizing campaign of contraceptives, began to fill papers. In the beginning it was quite easy. On a question with which of employees I would go on reconnaissance, I without deliberating chose our supply manager Nikita Semenycha. Semenych possessed amazing ability to get everything that is only possible. And without money. And to prove for the administration loss of a ballot box from a meeting room by the fact that it was dragged off by customers of our advertizing. The best workmate in the back of the enemy was difficult to be thought up.
On the second inquiry of the psychologist with whom I would appear on the desert island, I again - without deliberating, elected the secretary chief Sveta. Presented it to bikini bringing to me a cup of freshly brewed coffee … Beauty!
But the third test cast me into a stupor. Literally it sounded so:
“ you and all your employees from the director to the cleaner are in the submarine. The boat crashed and laid down on a bottom. It is possible to leave only via the torpedo tube. And the one who leaves the first for certain will escape. And the one who the last, for certain will die. Place the fellow workers and yourself in this list “.
I went nuts. From our management it was difficult for bigger provocation to present. You will write to the first on the director`s exit - will accuse of a lizoblyudstvo. - in egoism. The secretary Sveta - in adultery.
At first I decided to leave things to chance and to cast lots. Cut forty pieces of paper, wrote on them names of all staff of agency. But in time understood that the psychologist will report on the management on my unwillingness to solve a specific problem. And for career it was not really comme il faut.
Then I decided to make the list since the end and the first doomed myself to death. Let the management will estimate self-sacrifice of the employee! But then again changed the mind. From the point of view of psychology - it spoke about my low self-assessment.
To put in the end of the list of the director, deputy of a creative and the production manager? Safely. Colleagues will estimate. But whether will leave me after that at work - here in what a question?
Whom to offer? Perhaps to arrive by sex? At first to bring to a surface of women, then to ruin men? It seems, gentlemanlike, but how it will look from the point of view of psychology and my further career?
Polny Deadlock. It was necessary to take a break and to leave in a smoking-room. And there already discuss this problem.
Nearly wave fists.
Someone suggested to be guided by the alphabet, someone the seniority, someone age. Young people of type should live so not bad and to drown old men.
On the last offer the supply manager Nikita Semenovich gloomy noticed:
- Who will put me in the end of the list, can not approach with questions of change of a cartridge and availability of toilet paper in public places any more.
Then the secretary Sveta declared that to the chief those who will only try to include her in the list of the drowned will get only through her died body.
In the run high discussion someone pushed someone. The one who was pushed incidentally thrust the burning cigarette in an ear the production director Mischa Sidorchuk. Mischa, having howled from pain, pushed around to a maketchitsa Luce. That cut an elbow to me on a nose …
all left a smoking-room silently and tried not to look at each other. I, having taken seat in the chair on castors, silently took the test and the first since the end delivered to maketchiyets of Lyusyu. Then the programmer Seregu - for the fact that the antivirus cannot already deliver two days to me. Then security guard Borja. Did not greet me in the morning … When the psychologist Marya Sergeyevna from “The center of rendering psychological assistance to office workers“ collected by
tests, nobody any more to anybody talked. All were engaged directly in work.
Probably, the administration of it also tried to obtain.
I thought up a slogan to an advertizing campaign of contraceptives: “Protect yourself for 100% of undesirable pregnancy, send the husband to serve on the submarine“!
But the administration did not approve my slogan and forced to create further. What and to you I wish!